Boy: So what did you think of the movie? Andie: I thought it was okay. Boy: Sounds awesome. Andie: Yeah well I thought it was okay, until I was like “Man this is awesome…” *nervous chuckle* Boy: My mom’s not gonna be here for a while so, do you just wanna hang out? Andie: Here? Boy: Yeah, we could just like sit, right here, just… Andie: Oh, *Music* Boy: My uncle Maiben has a lot of guns. Andie: *Awkward sigh* Boy: He has like, a lot of ’em, and sometimes I get to shoot ’em Andie: That’s cool. *awkward chuckle* Boy: My sister has fancy rats. Andie: What is it-uh.. Is that like a name you gave them or.. Boy: No, they’re called fancy rats. Andie: So fancy rats is like a- SMOOCH BOIIII Other girls: “…I swear she almost got hit by them-” “Oh my gosh-” “I thought she did too,” “Oh my god my mom’s here.” “Can you drive us home?” “Yeah you guys can ride again..” “Yeah-..” … *Music* Andie: This is me at 15, and I’m very gay. *Music* *Water flowing down* Andie: I just- um… I just really need to talk to somebody… Therapist: When your mom called to make the appointment, um, she said she didn’t know why you wanted to come in. Andie: I uh, I, yeah I didn’t.. I didn’t want to tell her, why… Therapist: It’s okay, That’s- That’s what I’m here for. Andie: Sometimes I smoke pot with my friends. *Pen click* Therapist: Do you do that a lot? Andie: No just like whenever I do I just, I get like really paranoid, like.. I just can’t stop thinking like my mind is just like, crazy. Therapist: What do you think about? Andie: Like I don’t wanna kill myself- but like sometimes I feel like it would be so easy to die. Like I don’t wanna die, like I’m not- I’m not- I don’t wanna kill myself, like I’m not gonna kill myself, but like, sometimes when I smoke it’s like, “Oh my god,” like, “I could die.” ‘chuknowwhatImean? Therapist: Do you think about that a lot? Andie: Killing myself? No, that’s not why I’m- that’s not why I’m here. I mean not to laugh at that. It’s okay to come here, for that.. But I just like.. I’m saying like sometimes I get so high, that I feel like, anything can happen like, I could just like, ’cause I read stories like, people like, peel their arms off, Therapist: Uh-huh, Andie: With like an orange peeler because they think they’re an orange. Therapist: Do you ever think about trying other drugs? Andie: Like what? Therapist: Like.. Coc*, gives some people a really great high. (*cocaine) Andie: Oh. Okay. Maybe I’d just, drink. Show: -but in lesbian world.. ___’s married. *Andie’s zipper* Show: I’ve wanted to call you but… this is a really difficult situation for me- *garage door* *footsteps* *sports channel* Mom: *Laughs* Dad: What? Mom: Andie, what are you doing here? Andie: Hey, oh I’m just-.. Mom: I thought you were going to Judie’s house for dinner. Andie: No I’m um I just, the Cougars were on.. *Simultaneously* Mom: You should’ve come with us. Andie: Uh-I don’t want- I don’t really like steak. Dad: Hm, saved 20 bucks. Tess: We never get steak. Mom: Tess, we just had steak. Tess: Why is it so loud? Andie: *Inaudible* Tess: What are we watching? Andie: You can just- just change it if you want. Show: -forecast, we’re gonna work our way through the next couple of days for your Wednesday… Andie: *Inhale… loud exhale* Therapist: Have you gotten high since your last visit? Andie: What? Therapist: Have you gotten, paranoid? Andie: Oh, oh no, um.. No I haven’t smoked. Therapist: Good. Is there anything else, you wanna talk about? Andie: I’m… *exhale* Guess. Therapist: Guess… what, you want to talk about? *Inhale, exhale* Andie: I don’t- I can’t say it out loud, *sniffle* Therapist: Why not? Andie: *slurred* I don’t know I just can’t say it out loud without crying… Therapist: So cry, it’s okay. Andie: *Deep breath* I’m gay. *Inhale* I said, I can’t say it out loud without crying. Therapist: Do you not want to be gay? *Andie sniffles* Andie: No, like I do wanna be gay, like, I don’t care like, I am gay, but like, *inhale* just not now like, I-I just wanna be gay later you know like, like, when I’m in college or like, *sniffle* in California like, that’s fine.. but I don’t wanna be gay now like in high school. *inhale* like I don’t want anyone from my high school to know.. *sniffle + small exhale* *sniffle* Therapist: I used to date girls. Andie: You’re gay? *small giggle + sniffle* Therapist: I’m, bisexual, I’m married to a man, I have two kids but, I had a girlfriend. I had the biggest crush on this girl, we dated for a while, Andie: Do your parents know? Therapist: I never… explicitly came out to them, they just, knew I had a girlfriend. Andie: Really? Therapist: Yeah.