Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Bedroom – SNL


>>HEY, BABY.
YOU’RE LOOKING GOOD.>>WHAT?
OH YEAH. IT’S SUNDAY NIGHT.
THAT’S WHEN WE HAVE SEX.>>ALL RIGHT.
WELL, YOU KNOW, DON’T SAY IT LIKE THAT.
LIKE IT’S A HAIR APPOINTMENT OR SOMETHING.
>>NO. I’M PUMPED FOR IT.
LET’S START!>>I WAS THINKING MAYBE WE COULD
DO SOME FUN TONIGHT. MAYBE SPICE THINGS UP A LITTLE
TONIGHT YOU KNOW. MAYBE TRY SOME DIRTY TALK?
>>OH YEAH, THAT’S HOT. ♪♪♪
>>WHAT’S UP, YOU DIRTY GIRL?>>YEAH, WHAT’S UP, YOU FREAKING
ALCOHOLIC?>>OH, WELL, YOU KNOW, BABE.
LET’S NOT BRING UP MY OLD DEMONS, YOU KNOW?
I’M A LITTLE SENSITIVE ABOUT THAT.
WHAT IF YOU’RE MORE LIKE A LITTLE MEAN TO ME.
>>OKAY. WHAT’S UP, BITCH?
I MAKE MORE MONEY THAN YOU.>>OKAY.
THAT’S ANOTHER SORE SPOT FOR ME. LET’S KEEP IT SIMPLE.
JUST CALL ME DADDY.>>OKAY.
>>MM. YOU LIKE THAT?
>>OH, YEAH, DAD. DO ME, DAD.
>>MAYBE DON’T SAY DAD. DAD, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU’RE
TALKING ABOUT YOUR REAL DAD. LIKE YOUR BIOLOGICAL DAD.
>>YEAH.>>MAYBE WE NEED A LITTLE
STRUCTURE. A LITTLE ROLE PLAYING.
I’LL LEAD US OFF.>>HELLO, YOUNG LADY.
ARE YOU HERE AFTER CLASS FOR SOME EXTRA TUTORING?
>>OH, YEAH, I AM. BECAUSE I HAVE A LEARNING
DISABILITY. I READ THE WORDS ALL OUT OF
ORDER.>>THE THING IS THAT’S JUST KIND
OF SAD. HOW ABOUT, UM, YOU KNOW WHY
YOU’RE HERE IN THE PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE?
>>BECAUSE I BROUGHT A GUN TO SCHOOL.
>>NO. YOU DON’T HAVE A FUN, BABE.
I THINK — I THINK YOU’RE HERE BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN DRESSING
LIKE A SLUT. GIVE ME ONE REASON I SHOULDN’T
KICK YOU OUT OF SCHOOL.>>BECAUSE I WANT TO DO YOU.
>>YOU ARE BAD.>>YEAH.
I’M THE BADDEST GIRL IN 6th GRADE.
>>NO! NO, NO.
YOU CAN’T BE IN THE 6th GRADE BECAUSE — GENERAL RULE, ALL
RIGHT? DIRTY TALK, YOU’RE 18.
KEEP IT LEGAL.>>OH, OKAY.
OKAY. BUT I READ AT A 6th GRADE LEVEL
BECAUSE OF MY READING DISABILITY.
>>LET’S MOVE ON FROM THAT, OKAY?
KEEP IT SIMPLE AND FUN, ALL RIGHT?
LET’S START WITH A VOICE, OKAY?>>I’M LIAM.
I’M A SURFER FROM AUSTRALIA. WANT TO SEE MY DIDGERIDOO?
>>OH, YEAH. SHOW IT TO ME, WOW.
>>WHAT’S YOUR NAME?>>OWEN WILSON, BABY.
>>NOT OWEN WILSON. I’M NOT — YOU’RE NOT OWEN
WILSON. NO DISRESPECT.
“SHANGHAI NIGHTS” ALL DAY. YOU HAVE TO DO A LADY VOICE.
>>WANDA SYKES? [ AS SYKES ]
YOU WANT TO GET NASTY WITH WANDA SYKES, BABY?
YEAH.>>ISN’T SHE A LESBIAN?
>>OH. YEAH.
>>KIND OF HOT. [ AS SYKES ]
>>OH, YEAH! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

100 thoughts on “Bedroom – SNL

  1. It kind of bothers me that he's not looking at her 🙄 like you can tell he's reading the cue cards to the side and it's so annoyingly obvious

  2. I just wanna know: Does Melissa not want the guy to touch her boobs, does SNL not want the guy to touch her boobs, or does the guy not wanna touch her boobs?

  3. "Well hello, young lady. Are you here after class for some extra tutoring?"

    "Aww yeah I am….because I have a learning disability."

    I died 😂

  4. That car commercial was disturbing. Hearing a child using the word dick and bigger in the same sentance. Did a child molester write this commercial?and what can be said of the director ,producer,and snl for running the add

  5. Her butt smells like cheese…..and she has STINKY milky white feet awwww I'm cumming…..oh yeah I forgot her extremely hairy pussy smells like cabbage cooking awwwwww I'm so drained!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. This is hilarious! I saw Melissa performing at Zanie's in Chicago last night, she is awesome and such a sweet personality! I got to sit right in front of her! The funniest sketches are usually the ones that have no politics and involves the most ordinary things we do every day when interacting. We need more of these SNL! More Melissa too!

  7. Melissa is super cute super funny and so fucking unique. And absolute perfect chick. I can't enough of her funny voice.

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