Laughter is the Best Medicine

Best Sexist Jokes!

D- So, we’re all sexist right? T- Oh yeah A- I’m damn sexy. D- I’m just assuming right? N- Define sexist. S- Yeah. D- Look, down upon the opposite sex. T- Oh, wait. No, I thought that meant D- I know I’m kidding. T- I thought about something else D- None of us are sexist A- I like to look up on the opposite sex. You go to the mall. You get a mirror. It’s fun. D- You know, what’s great Is that’s inconspicuous. Nobody notices that. A- No, Exactly? Selfie Stick on The Ground Here on your you put it on your Shoes no Sham It’s quite the better now Look at They’re Looking Down To Look up you Walk Into walls and Security Officers We have sexist Jokes all right sexist Jokes Are Good I’m Curious to See how good, or Bad They are we’re not We’re not sexist Though no sirs uh [what] sexist Would Say [why], you, sound Just like A sexist yeah are they cheesy Or they Really offensive Summer I mean it’s across the board, oh Gotta Wait [for] me hey Can I start what you shut up Shut Up my gosh [Just] on the Start of a small Turn tell a joke Already Tell Fucking Joke The Ladies Are Looking in The Mirror She’s like I look fat Give me A compliment to her Husband [Husbands] like you have Perfect eyesight, [oh]? Gotta Start off With A joke Could go either way a lot of These are interchangeable There’s no Particular order We’re Gonna go back and Forth and Stuff like that so there’s an Airplane that’s about to crash and this Female Jumps Up and Frantically Announces that if I’m gonna die I want to die Feeling like A Woman so a guy Throws her his Shirt and Says I earn This Let’s Say that’s sexy like yeah, do you know what I’m Seeing right Now it Is our female Demographic Here from 3% of – This isn’t really A Joke But it’s like it’s like A fact God gave men a Penis and A brain but Unfortunately Not Enough Blood to run both at the same Time That’s A kind of it’s not a Joke but it’s all right don’t Laugh at then yeah you, don’t yeah yeah, oh yeah We can Loud me I’m Supposed to hmm? Inquisitive Sometimes The dick Thinks for You that’s the point of the huh yeah why, do women have legs to Walk I thought it but I didn’t say [it] he Said it yeah but Specifically from the Bedroom to the and then back to [them] They Get Better up someday life okay hey here We go how Many bright sensitive Caring men in the World does it Take to do the Dishes I don’t know Both of Them, well Names Both, of Them Cuz [that’s] suggesting There’s only Two you Gotta do dishes why, don’t women blink during Foreplay Because it doesn’t Happen There’s not Enough Time right okay [Cuz], We don’t Care what do you call the useless bit of skin at the end of a Penis I’m not familiar with this bit of skin the man the man I Was gonna Say the woman? I get Could go either way yeah it Could go either way um why? Do Women have smaller feet Than men Because They’re Smaller all over except Their hips and Breasts Like it’s so they Can stand closer to the sink Kids I didn’t Make it up Can I throw it in There that’s yeah it Please, [oh] it’s my ex got Some good yeah it’s a my Sex right why Can’t Stevie Wonder See his Friends Cuz He’s blind blood Because he’s Married ha ha Why, do men die before Their Wives because, they’re sick and Tired of Hearing her bed I want to yeah, okay? What Three words are Guaranteed to Destroy A man’s Ego [I] love you are you in is it in is it [a] [zit] in That Said You’ve Ever Seen, I’ve no i think I saw a micropenis [I’ve] Heard hitler had One that was on the interwebs the other day There was a bunch of our Advice Row No I did was drop Buganda Western Propaganda so, we Can Take down hitler yeah what, We really hate This guy, let’s Say? He has a small [Ding] There yeah that’s like can, we do a video about sexist Jokes yep Here We go how Can you tell if A man is sexually Aroused he’s Breathing yeah? Yeah We do like Sex what Should you do if you see your Ex-Husband Rolling Around in Pain on the ground fuck’em? Yeah great Joke Yeah Point Lam an answer yeah but it’d be Pointing [Laughing] Show an Ambulance Root him again, oh Son of A bitch yeah that took you Forever to deliver That, well because you guys, were yeah We’re Gonna stop talking to [back-To-Back] how Many men Does it Take to Screw in A light Bulb Jokes One First Ones One We’ve Tried it yeah Stacks Ones he Just holds it up There and Waits for the World to revolve Around him That’s A lead single [june] Yeah yeah right right That Can go in A lot of Places and the other answer Is Three one to Screw in the Bulb and Two to listen to Him Brag About the Screwing Part yes yes, We do like Sex and Talking About it With [our] Friends a Quarter right no There’s no Particular [order] why Don’t you Worse sart Another knot they get Better and better why, do men Name Their Penises They, don’t we yeah We does that don’t think Anyone Here Does I haven’t Named it’s A Joke so Let’s roll Well [Rock] [God] [Shut] [it] Around like Wait Wait am I the only I got a tattoo and everything yeah dick Name yeah, I do get a, dick man [yeah] his dick has Papers [Felipe] Make Fiddlesticks What’s the Joke Robbie why do men Name Their Penises the answer is because They, don’t like the idea of Having a stranger Make 90% of Their Decisions I so whole [Thing’s] [a] nouns, We all need to name our dish except for you We do like the Sex Way okay your as Yours established yeah We need to get Papers Reminds an Immigrant How’d That Happen, [oh], no Does he Have one Slanty-eyed A Glass Eye Oddly, his Name’s Ping Pong big Bug big dog [This] [Lady] is Turning Around right we’re Done? I Hope There’s one At least one More sexist Joke at some Point in This Video I Got Tears for you know it’s been A while since I had the tears but I might Have Allergy Why Does it Take a Hundred Million Sperm to Fertilize an Egg [I] don’t think it Does I think it’s Just One Whoa, There’s a million going only one [Fertilized] you just Shoot out one Yeah No that’s The Point I think [more] Sharpshooter One Thing I think I came Because not one Stop and Ask Directions Finally is like no no yeah Towards man yeah men don’t ask Directions [Sound] like that with gps how Do you Keep your Husband from Reading your email You don’t Marry A, nosy Person I Love our plant as it just it’s Really good at Rename The Email Folder to Instruction Manual Yeah, well A lot of These are and They’re all just Shaking [Their] head like Mm-Hmm What’s the Difference Between a Sorority and a circus when Is know Delia I don’t try to? Well give it up then, don’t Ask a circus is A cunning Array of Stunts Yep Stunning Array like the thing Got it How I like This one how, was A woman like a condom he’s Made of rubber yeah, no? No Just Love doesn’t always Work Fuck it Is [Shit] but this, One’s Pretty good Both Spend more Time in your wallet than on your dick, oh? It’s Really good [I] going yeah yeah how are Tornadoes in Marriage Alike They Both ruin your life That’s The Short Version yeah, no One’s Gonna lose a House Yeah it’s that Thing yeah They Both Begin With A lot of Sucking and Blowing and in The end you lose your House yeah [if] the dove is the bird of Peace what is the Bird of True dog Swallow yes ah very Nice [Shema] Pow I like This one how do you Annoy your Girlfriend during Sex Call her Oh Call it Right yeah what is the Definition of Making love it’s what women do when men fuck Them yep? What is Thick [Knowledge]? I’m not sexist by the way, no none of us are that’s what A sexist Would Say Our fat Girls and Mopeds Alike all right until your Friends See yep yeah and it Does Know Every One of These yeah [oh] this Is this Is Styx Website Thank you? Hashtag I’m not sexist Animals don’t want to answer [Anymore] but i can’t Know Their [Flair] Kind of Obvious why Does a bride smile when she walks up the aisle [I] don’t know this One’s Half the House Now, no she knows She’s given her last blowjob yeah that’s not a money fuck Good yeah that’s A [lie] [yeah], that’s A lie it Should, be in The vows, oh god witnesses Yeah Exactly Why are There no female Astronauts on the Moon There’s, no, no, One’s Still your Moon rather’s it doesn’t need to be Cleaned yet Okay, Actually [it] Is very Dusty, do you know why women Fake orgasms to get to the dishes Quicker Nope That Right Turn These [Ones] Time man against them That’s the best Sex ever you

100 thoughts on “Best Sexist Jokes!

  1. I got called sexist one time in public by some feminist, so I told her. "I'm not sexist, I'm actually very equal, because I equally tell everyone to get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich"

  2. What's makes a washing machine better than an 18 year old girlfriend? The washer will clean your clothes and won't follow you around for a week after you put a load in it. #imnotsexist

  3. When you know you gonna put a comment saying your offended but you clicked the video because of the title… 😩

  4. I can feel the triggered Sjw's coming. Grab your Ben Shapiro Edition crucifix and scream "HE GONE THOT" to help combat them.

  5. The problems with these people in the comment, all over the internet, and the makers of his video, fail to realise that women are the same species. You're criticising your own species because of genitals.

  6. The dick waddled up to the free kisses stand and it asked the women running the stand Hey choke on me got any conkem’s

  7. What's the difference between a feminist, and A suicide vest…The suicide vest accomplishes somthing when triggered.

  8. How to ruin a man's confidence in a single sentence? – Ask him "Is it in"?
    How to ruin a woman's confidence in a single sentence? – Reply to her "I don't know"

  9. What's the difference between a suicide jacket and a woman?

    A suicide jacket achieves something when it's triggered

  10. I don't get the incels getting super excited because the title says sexist jokes… I mean these guys are making sexist jokes towards men as well. I mean these guys aren't actually sexist, they just like jokes, these guys wouldn't be married if they were truly sexist.

  11. What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman? The back of his hand.

    What's the difference between a man and women?
    One of them is a cumdumpster. One of them is the filler.

    Why do women fake orgasms? 
    Because they think men care. 

    Why did God create women? 
    To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet.

    How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
    None, feminist can't change anything, only the dishes.

  12. Hey neebs I'd like to introduce you to Jerry he's been my best friend never once has he failed me he's gone through the worst and stood with me he's been put with hard tasks and my mother is very cautious that I don't play with him it been a hard time without him in no nut November

  13. Why do they give women a drivers license? I dont know either.. theres no road between the bedroom and kitchen is there

  14. What's common between a blowjob and a sandwich? One has to put both inside one's mouth first before you make your final decision.

  15. american french and russian once made a bet who will tell the biggest bullshit so first
    the american:
    A horse walks to the bar and asks for water waiter gived him the bill and observated that not many horses go to this bar,horse respounded with :with 5 bucks for a glass fo water? that's no wonder why.
    Then Fench guy top that off :
    A Duck walks in to the bar and the waiter was also a duck.
    [Russian and american bouth facepalmed]
    then russian top it:
    A pretty feminist walks into a bar..
    American: he won
    French: indeed

  16. 😂how are wives and condoms similar…they both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick

  17. What do you do when your dishwasher stops working??

    Slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work

  18. My perfect woman,would be….A cook in the kitchen…….A maid in the living room……..And a whooooore , in the bedroom.

  19. Is Google a female or a male?

    Female because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence and it’s already assuming what you are saying

  20. Is google male or female?
    Female, because it doesn't let you finish your sentence before making a suggestion.

  21. Do you know why Jews don't get circumcised? Because they're to cheap.
    Why do Jews wear tiny hats? Because they're half off.
    Whats the difference between dead babies & bowling balls in the back of a truck? You can't remove bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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