-Ooh, girl, I’ve been waitin for this movie to come out
for months. -I know. Me too.
-Mm-hmm. Oh, here we go, here we go
here we go. -I rewatched 1 through 7
so I would be ready. [ Knife plunges, man groans -No, the black guy’s dead
already? We didn’t even make it
through the credits. -That’s got to be
some kind of a record. Oh, wait, wait,
here comes the cute girl. Here comes the cute girl.
-Okay, okay. -Oh, home girl is showing
a lot of side boob. You know what that means. Dead.
-Shhhh. -I know, she should be quiet
-Mm-hmm! -The killer could be anywhere.
Run, girl! -No, no, no, the other way
-The other way! -The other way!
[ Knife plunges ] -Dead.
-Dead. [ Laughter ] -[ Clears throat ] -Oh, you got allergies?
You got allergies? Hey, you need to try
the shh-shh. -Or have you tried the hoh-hoh -You should try that.
You should try that for that That’ll help with the —
[ Engine revs ] Oh, my God,
he’s got a chain saw! -Oh, my goodness, girl.
I can’t watch this. Tell me what’s happening.
Tell me what’s happening. -Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
-Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. -Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
-Tell me. Tell me. Tell me -Okay, I’ma tell you, girl
I’ma tell you, girl. Okay. Okay. Okay,
so what’s happening is, okay, the other cute girl, she’s changing out of her bikini
into another bikini? I think it’s an evening bikini
I don’t really know. Now she’s trying to open
that crazy evil puzzle box -Now, why is it that every tim
in every horror movie, people do exactly what the crazy
old man says not to do? You know what that means.
[ Knife plunges ] Dead.
-Dead. [ Laughter ] [ Cellphone ringing ] Is your phone ringing, girl?
-Is that your phone? -Somebody — Is that your phone?
-Is that your phone? -Somebody — Oh, wait, girl,
I think that’s my phone. Girl, I think that’s my phone. I got it. Wait a minute, girl.
Wait a minute. Hello? -Tell them you at the movies -I’m at the movies.
Who is this? Hello? Who — Girl,
I think this is you. -What? [ Laughter ] -I think you butt dialed me. -Oh, I sure did. [ Laughter ] -I’m at the movies! -I’m at the movies with you too,
girl! [ Applause ] -Uh, excuse us.
Could y’all keep it down? We’re trying to watch a movie.