Laughter is the Best Medicine

Dennis Rodman Becomes Supreme Leader of the Cold Tub | Cold as Balls | Laugh Out Loud Network

– What’s going on? I’m Kevin Hart and right now you’re watching
season three of Cold as Balls. What’s up man? – How you doin’ Kev? – Welcome, Sir. – It’s all good, it’s all good. – Hey, take your robe, put your robe there
Dennis, we’ll go around and get in the tub. I’m excited to have you on, man. – Oh come on man. – Big day. So we start off, ’cause it’d take me a second
to get in the tub. – All right. – Ohh yeah, here we go. – You should be used to this, right? – Well, no, no I’m not. – All right . – Never will be. I don’t know why anybody would. It’s cold water. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome. Oh sh*t. We got an amazing guest on the show today. We got Dennis Rodman. – What, that’s Kevin Hart, right? – [Hart] Yeah, I am Kevin Hart. – Right, cool man. – Should I call you the Dennis Rodman or just
Dennis Rodman? – Call me The Ambassador. – Ambassador? – I like that. Ambassador. – I’m a fan of the legend of Dennis Rodman. There was a couple players back in the day
that made being rough, being tough, cool. Was this something that was done on purpose
or did you slowly get into that? – No, I had to work myself into a position
to be a player. I came from Dallas in the projects. – Okay. – And I told my mother, I said, you know what,
I’m not coming back unless I make something of myself. – Oh sh*t. – I never went back for three years at all. And those guys actually looked at me at a
Rec center down the street from my house and I was very fortunate they saw me and gave
me opportunity. – Wow. Were you a tough kid? – Back in High School I used to be a mother’s
boy. I was born like, just a follower because you
know, living in projects, what other kids do, you do. – Yeah. – So basically I got caught up in that game,
went to jail, stood and watched at the airport. – How many times you been in jail? – Oh my God. – Sh*t, it’s that many? You just looked up to the sky, I saw it. – I’m so sorry. – I saw that, I saw you look up to the sky. – Is that like back then or like the last
10 years? – Let’s get more in the tub. – Are we going deep? – Yeah, let’s go in, we goin’ in. Come on Dennis, we gotta go. – All right. – [Hart] All right, you get in first. – I can’t get in first, man, I ain’t been
in. – You ain’t been in a cold tub in years? – In years. G*d damn. Sh*t. You know what they say about black people? We hate cold sh*t like this. – Yeah, normally it takes me a long time each
episode to get in it. – All right. – So, when I say how many times you been in
jail? Ball park, ball park. – My lifetime? – Yeah, how many times? – I’d say over 100. – Over 100 G*d damn times? – Yep. – In jail? – Of having too many parties at my house. And for seven years straight it was like seven
days a week. – G*d damn, Dennis! – Seven days, seven days a week, 24/7. – Dennis, really quick, just give me a second
to pay some bills. White hand. Thank you. I just wanna say that this episode is brought
to you by Old Spice, that’s right. We got something called the sweat defense. Dennis, I know you know about that ’cause
you played a lot of defense, man. Thank you Old Spice and everything you do
for us here at Cold as Balls. Thank you white hand. There’s a lot of things that I’ve heard. But you know, you can’t believe everything
you hear. So hearing it come out your mouth. – It’s true. Coming out of my mouth, it’s true. – Yes, I heard you broke your d*ck like three
times. – Three times, yeah. – That’s the truth? – Yep, that’s the truth. The hospital term, you know, if you pull your
pants down, you say, oh I know what that is. He said, I said, what is it? He said, you got a contusion of your c*ck. I said contusion? – Wait, wait, so hold on. Wait a second, what? – A contusion? I said, contusion? – [Hart] Contusion? What the f*ck is that? – Of your c*ck? This is education for all men out there that
have had contusions. – That’s what I’m saying. – No need to feel confused anymore because
there was a contusion on your c*ck, right? – True story. – This is breaking news right here on Cold
as Balls. And by breaking, I do mean literally breaking
news. Do me a favor, take your stool out and get
all red. – Yep. – There you go. Thank you white hand. – There you go. I’m in Kevin, what’s up baby? I know your short and things, but what’s up? – Here we go. Don’t threaten me with a good time. – [Rodman] How many times you do this show
a day? – Hey, well you know. – What do you use, baby lotion? – [Hart] Well, that’s. – Baby oil, baby lotion? – [Hart] That’s it, that’s it. – KY? – Here white hand, take this. Okay. Ah, shit. So, question for you. What was it like playing, you know, with Michael
Jordan at that time? You know, there’s oo’ing and aw’ing constantly
around. – Lit. – About the quote on quote goal. And how was your relationship with Michael? – It was cool. I think when I went to Chicago, that’s a great
story though. – [Hart] What, you going to Chicago? – Yeah. – Well don’t threaten me with a good time
and not tell me about it. – That’s when Gregg Popovich was the GM. He didn’t like me at all. – Why? – I wasn’t the church going guy. David Robbins called me the devil. – David called you that? – David called me the devil. I said okay man, whatever. I said you didn’t pay me to f*cking be nice. You pay me to f*cking win, sh*t. You know I love David. David’s a good guy. But Popovich wanted me to get out of there
so bad so he traded me to Chicago for Will Perdue straight up. Here’s your shit, get the f*ck out. – We’ll take Will Perdue. Give us Will Perdue. Y’all get the devil. – So anyways, so, I go to Chicago and we have
a press conference. I had two of my dogs with me, german shepherds. The next thing you know, I took off my hat
and I turned my head around. I had red hair with a bull emblem on the back
of my head. – Holy cow. – And they said, you’re officially on the
Chicago Bulls. And Phil asked Mike and Scotty, do you guys
mind Dennis being on this team? They said, yeah, if he wants to win, let’s
win. So I got there. – Y’all got there and it was– – It was sawing up from there. – It was from that point on, when you were
in Chicago, you know there’s a lot of heavy press that came with you. The one that I remember is when you married
yourself. When you put on the wedding dress. – That’s right, that got f*cked up. – Explain that. – I was doing a book signing thing in New
York. I was in a hotel. I said what should I do, what should I wear? So I just came up with this thing and said,
I might just wear a wedding dress and I’ll marry myself. It just came to me, just out the blue. And this famous guy from London came down
and said okay, great, we’ll make you a dress and the next thing I said, okay, let me have
eight women that’s gonna be my bridesmaid, whatever the f*ck you wanna call them. And they dressed in tuxedos and I had like
a horse and carriage. I’m looking around these buildings and it’s
like a ticker tape parade. – Yeah. – And people don’t still know it’s me. I still had the veil on and stuff like that. So I walked in and I was signing books and
stuff like that. So I took it off, it was me. And people was like, oh sh*t, he got us. – The whole thing just, I’m going to be free. I want people to understand that it’s okay
to be free. And be fine with all that comes with it. – When I was doing tattoos before anybody
thought about doing tattoos, I was going to David Stern’s office in New York and he said
if you do anymore tattoos, I’m gonna kick you out. I was like, what? So, basically, that just fueled the fire right
there. I said, okay great, I went and got a tattoo
that night and then I just kept getting tattoos, piercings, kept doing my thing, loving my
gay community and then all of a sudden, the NBA said wait a minute, we got something here. We got something with this guy. Because everyone’s starting to love it. Back then, guys didn’t have tattoos, guys
didn’t have piercings, guys didn’t say what they wanna say. If they did say what they wanna say, all of
a sudden they pay a fine for it. They pay the penalty. For me, it’s more like, whatever guys, take
it or leave it. – When you look at all of the players in the
NBA now that cover their sleeves, their necks, or whatever, it came from some place. – You see people that’s in hospitals, doctors. You see policeman having tattoos. So, everything is so acceptable now. – My Aunt Thelma’s got a tattoo on her neck
that says it is what it is. – Right. – She’s older, so it’s gotta be stretched
out to see and say it is what it is. But when it’s like this, it look like it say
wha wha. – Right. – ‘Cause you can’t see a word. ‘Cause she gained some weight in her neck,
too. Whatever, that’s a long story. – Okay. – But it’s a good segway to get into love,
’cause I love my Aunt. And you’ve had your share of love. How long were you with Carmen Electra? – I don’t know, 10, 15 days. – Wait a minute, what? – So we go to Vegas, we get on a private plane,
we go to Hard Rock. I’m downstairs drinking like a f*cking fish. We go to the Little White Chapel. She’s like, your size, five foot nothing. – Well, that’s nice. I don’t think that’s factual information. – Whatever, man. – I prefer 5’5″. – 5’5″. Okay, so she’s like 4’11”. But anyways, we standing there and he’s goes,
well, you know, he’s just going through this whole f*cking ritual of, you know, this civilizes,
and I’m like, okay, I’m just, okay, this mother f*cker. – Just breaking down what marriage means. – I said, wait a minute, hold on. Can I say something? I said, you need to hurry the fuck up before
I change my mind, okay? God damn. – Wow. – He said okay great, do you– – That’s romantic. – Civilized I don’t give a– – What the f*ck? Wait a second, Dennis. Darryl! When did you get that? – [Rodman] What’s up with the chain? – Well obviously somebody has some influence. What is going on, man? When did you get all these f*cking piercings? Did you do this? – I don’t know about that. – Well did he go to your guy? – That’s up to him. – You don’t just show up to work like this
without me knowing. This, this, we, this will be addressed. All right, so Carmen Electra, as you said,
a very small person. – Madonna was kind of short. – Damn, that’s right, you rolled with Madonna,
too. – Yeah, she was cool. – You guys still cool? – Yeah, well. – Got a relationship, like you guys, if you
saw her, you’d be like, Hey Madonna, what’s up? You would speak. – We’re on that level, yeah. – That’s pretty legendary. – There’s more girls but we ain’t gonna get
into that. – G*d damn, Dennis, well, that’s how you got
the contusion. Bam Bam. I know you had some contusions. – [Rodman] He’s with you too? – Bam Bam has been with me for a while. He’s a little more reserved. You know what else I wanna know about? Kim Jong Un. Like do you– – Kim juggled, yeah. – First of all, how are you friends? – Yeah, it was dope in the beginning. – How did that happen? – He loved the Chicago Bulls. He contacted Michael first. And Michael told him, like no, I’m not doing
that. So, the next guy he asked was me. He said, okay Dennis, you wanna go to North
Korea? They didn’t say Kim Jung Un, they said you
wanna go to North Korea? And I immediately said yes. And I’m thinking it’s like a f*cking autograph
show. And the next thing you know, the Harlem Globetrotters
doing an exhibition over there in North Korea so they asked me to be on the team. So basically, get off the plane, we walk into
this private hanger. Got 20,000 North Koreans – Oh my God. – In the stadium, they all in black and white. And all of a sudden, everybody stands up,
clapping, clapping, clapping. And they stand up and they turn around towards
me. Everybody’s quiet. And I’m like, I’m thinking, they are cheering
me. I looked over, I said, who is that little
guy right there? – Holy cow. – They said, that’s our Supreme Leader. I said, Supreme Leader what? – Oh no, oh no. – He said no that’s our leader. So, he said, how do you like our country? I’m like, it’s cool. – [Hart] Yeah. – Just sort of stuff like that and then all
of a sudden we just start talking about Chicago Bulls. – Great segway into the Bulls. How do you like our country? I think it’s cool. The Bulls are my favorite. Best friends. – We’ve been good friends after that. – What do you guys when you hang out? – We play basketball. – Do you do things that make him feel like
he can play or are you ever like, all right, f*ck it, I’m gonna play for real to show you
you ain’t sh*t? Pow! Get that sh*t out of here. – No. – When the last time you talked to him? – Last sh*t hit, they always call. – Really? – Gotta have flip phones. – What’s going on? You know, you know what year this is, right? – My phone’s always tapped. – Oh, sh*t. – You know, the people don’t know that. If people finally knew that, my temp phones
always tapped. – Who just told you to do that? Kim Jung did that? Who’s in the headset? Holy sh*t. You know, this is the part of the show where
I normally let you ask questions. Kim Jung Un! Okay, all right, okay, all right. Normally, this is the part of the show where
I would get you to ask me questions and I will answer them. But we’re not gonna do that because people
are listening. Stop chuck– Kim Jung Un! I hear you man! Okay, Dennis, Dennis. I would say I’ll call you, but I’m never f*cking
calling you. Kim Jung Un, I’m not your problem. – That’s Donald Trump’s problem. – He’ll turn Cold as Balls into a full f*cking
government issued situation. You’re fired and so are you. ‘Cause I don’t know what the f*ck is in those
microphones. Ah, ah, I just want to apologize, if you all
are listening to anything that you think was wrong. We are sorry at Cold as Balls, okay? All of us are. And, Dennis, you were a great guest. You listening to me Kim? Oh my God. I’m sorry and I love Jesus. Jesus Christ. Where’s my? Russell, meet me in the back! This whole set is tapped!

100 thoughts on “Dennis Rodman Becomes Supreme Leader of the Cold Tub | Cold as Balls | Laugh Out Loud Network

  1. Hate him or love him

    Dennis Rodman gonna die knowing he did everything he wanted to and lived life to the fullest.

  2. Dennis dipping his fingers in like a casual lord of the ice, while Kevin can't even fully commit past his legs XD

  3. Dennis Rodman isn’t weird,he’s just himself.He doesn’t confine himself to a certain sect of people or way of thinking.He’s free.
    He doesn’t care what you’ll think of him

  4. White 🤚🏻 hand really Kevin you know how sensitive everyone is now days, you if a white dude said thank you black hand all hell would break lose! Just saying…..

  5. Nope there's a guy who spends hours in icy waters in the north with nothing but shorts on then walks around on the ice and seems to be unaffected by the cold entirely, Unfortunately I can't remember his name….

  6. I thought you were hurt Kevin your a joke nobody cares about you, leaving the seen of an accident you caused people covering for you

  7. If "white hand" was "black hand" and the guys in the tub were 2 White Boys……this would be a situation…
    Just an observation…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *