Welcome to the best goddamn draw my life you will ever see…I’m Zlatan – who the hell are you? Zlatan, part man, part god, was born in Sweden in 1981… …and would go on to become Sweden’s greatest ever sportsperson… You mean second… Pfff… with all due respect to the others…Zlatan is first, second, third, fourth and fifth. Bjorn, before I break your legs. Zlatan signed his first contract with Malmo in 1996 At 17, Zlatan was offered a trial by Arsene Wenger but.. “Zlatan doesn’t do auditions…” 2001, Zlatan signed for Ajax. Things didn’t start well – and they tried loaning Zlatan to Southampton If Zlatan had gone there, who knows where he would have ended up… Liverpool probably But Koeman became the Ajax manager… and he gave Zlatan a chance to show his godliness Trophies were won … Zlatan went on to kick some serious ass across Europe becoming the most expensive player ever with fees totalling 180 million and winning 8 consecutive league titles Kicking ass comes easy to Zlatan Check out Zlatan’s moves… Zlatan fights like a god with his feet and with his mouth… Pep started his philosopher thing. I was barely listening. Why would I? It was advanced bullshit about blood, sweat and tears. Pep, you have no balls! Pep, you bought a Ferrari but drive it like a Fiat. I’m not violent, but if I were Pep, I would be frightened. You’ll have to ask your wife. What Carew does with a football, Zlatan can do with an orange. In 15 years I’ve never seen a good referee in this shit country. I don’t give a s*** who wins, I’m going on holiday. Is Zlatan the best player in the world? Only god knows. And you’re talking to him now.
Yes he is.