Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

How Emma Thompson Prepared For ‘Late Night’


LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST
GUEST IS A TWO-TIME ACADEMY AWARD WINNER YOU KNOW FROM
“SENSE AND SENSIBILITY,” “LOVE ACTUALLY,” AND “HOWARD’S END.” PLEASE WELCOME, DAME EMMA
THOMPSON! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪ ♪ ♪ ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )>>WOOO! OH!>>Stephen: DELIGHTFUL. DELIGHTFUL. I’M AFRAID THAT’S ALL WE HAVE
TIME FOR. THANK YOU. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THEY’RE VERY EXCITED. THEY’RE VERY EXCITED.>>THANK YOU. ANYWAY, SO, TAXI. I’M EXHAUSTED NOW! I’M EXHAUSTED!>>Stephen: THANK YOU FOR
COMING BACK.>>I’M SO GLAD AND HAPPY TO SEE
YOU.>>Stephen: YOU KNOW, AN
INTERESTING THING HAS HAPPENED SINCE THE LAST TIME YOU WERE
HERE. YOU HAVE BIG NEWS IN YOUR LIFE. YOU CAN VEHICLE A DAME FOR THE
PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO DON’T KNOW. EXPLAIN WHAT A “DAME” IS?>>WELL, I’M NOT ENTIRELY SURE. ( LAUGHTER )
NOTHING SEEMS TO HAVE CHANGED. I THOUGHT MAYBE. WHEN IT HAPPENED, YOU KNOW, IT
WOULD BE TREATED DIFFERENTLY IN SOME WAY– I MEAN, OBVIOUSLY, I
HAD ALL THE CHAIRS IN MY HOUSE RAISED SLIGHTLY, THE ONES I SIT
IN OBVIOUSLY GLERCH ELSE’S–>>NOT TOO HIGH. SO PEOPLE ARE SLIGHTLY– “IS
SHE– IS SHE HIGHER?” BUT NOT SURE. TINY BIT SORT OF CONFUSED. I THOUGHT I WOULD BE GREETED BY
PLEAS MEN IN THE STREET. I THOUGHT I WOULD BE ABLE TO
WALK MY SHEEP OVER THE LONDON BRIDGE. I DON’T KNOW. BUT EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE THE
SAME.>>Stephen: WELL, I’M SO
SORRY.>>YES, WHAT I CAN TELL YOU?>>Stephen: HERE IS THE MOMENT
YOURSELF. HERE IS YOU, RECEIVING YOUR
DAMEHOOD, RIGHT THERE, WITH PRINCE WILLIAM. PRINCE WILLIAM.>>SHE’S VERY NICE.>>Stephen: VERY NICE FELLA?>>SUCH A NICE BOY.>>Stephen: DID YOU KNOW HIM
ALREADY BEFORE THIS MOMENT?>>I DID KNOW HIM ALREADY, YES,
I DID. BECAUSE I KNOW HIS DAD QUITE
WELL. AND HE’S LOVELY. BUT I HAD ONLY SEEN HIM WHEN HE
WAS QUITE A TALL BABY. ( LAUGHTER )
AND– AND HE’S GOT A LOT TALLER.>>Stephen: “TALL BABY. TALL BABY.”>>A VERY TALL BABY. AND HE WAS JUST SO DELIGHTFUL. AND NOW, OF COURSE, GROWN UP
WITH CHILDREN EVERYTHING AND.>>Stephen: AND HAS BABIES OF
HIS OWN.>>I RUSHED TO HIM AND SAID,
“DARLING, CAN I KISS YOU?” AND HE SAID, “NO, NO, YOU CAN’T
KISS ME.” I KISSED HIM LATER.>>Stephen: THAT’S NICE. I ALSO NOTICED IN THIS
PHOTOGRAPH YOU’RE WEARING–>>SNEAKERS.>>Stephen: YOU’RE WEARING
ATHLETIC SHOES.>>THEY’RE POSH SNEAKERS. EVERYBODY GAVE ME A LOT OF
TBRUBL THAT. BUT I THINK THEY LOOK NICE.>>Stephen: THEY DO. SO YOU CAN GET AWAY QUICKLY IN
CASE THERE’S A SWORD. IS THERE A SWORD INVOLVED?>>NO, AND IT’S NOT FAIR. MY HUSBAND IS VERY CROSS. IF YOU ARE GIVEN A KNIGHTHOOD,
THE WIFE BECOMES LADY SO-AND-SO. AND THE HUSBAND GETS NOTHING.>>Stephen: YOU’RE DAME.>>I’M DAME AND HE’S PLAY OLD
GREG MEH. AND HE’S NOT PLEASED.>>Stephen: SURE, I CAN SEE.>>PLUS, I WEAR THE BADGE IN
BED. AND IT’S SHARP. IT’S SHARP. ( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE ) VERY POINTY.>>Stephen: SURE.>>POINTY.>>Stephen: SURE. YOU HAVE A BADGE? YOU HAVE A BADGE?>>IT’S A BIG BADGE. IT’S A BADGE, A DOUBLE BADGE.>>Stephen: IF YOU GET PULLED
OVER, YOU CAN PLABFLASH IT TO THE COP AND SAY, “EXCUSE ME,
DAME.”>>OH OR YOU CAN FLASH IT AND TA
HIS EYE OUT.>>Stephen: YOU WANTED TO WALK
YOUR SHEEP OVER LONDON BRIDGE. I KNOW YOU SPEND A FAIR AMOUNT
OF TIME IN SCOTLAND. DO YOU HAVE SHEEP?>>ACTUALLY, THIS IS QUITE A
GOOD STORY. DO I MIND IF I TELL YOU A STORY?>>Stephen: I WOULD LOVE A
GOOD STORY.>>ABOUT SCOTLAND. MY DAUGHTER BFS EIGHT. SO THE SHEEP WERE IN THE FIELD,
AND AT THE BOTTOM OF THE FIELD THERE’S A LITTLE PLACE WHERE I
GO TO WASH. I WASH IN THE RIVER. AND OFTEN, IF THE WEATHER IS
NICE, I WILL WASH NAKED.>>Stephen: YOU HAVE INDOOR
PLUMBING, RIGHT?>>MORE OR LESS, MORE OR LESS,
YES. SO I WALKED DOWN WITH THE TOWEL,
HAD A WASH AND WALKED BACK UP AND THAT’S WHAT I DID– NAKED. TAWZBECAUSE THERE’S NO ONE
AROUND EXCEPT THE SHEEP. OBVIOUSLY, THEY ARE APPALLED,
APPALLED. THERE’S A LOT OF RUSHING, “SHE’S
COMING. SHE’S COMING.” THEY’RE JUST APPALLED.>>Stephen: SOMEONE JUST
SHEERED HER.>>SHEER HER, SHEER HER. DO SOMETHING! HE’S COMING UP THE FIELD BUY. BAAAA”P” IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
NIGHT, IT’S ABOUT 10:00, MY DAUGHTER AND I– SHE’S ABOUT
EIGHT. FOR SOME REASON WE WERE ALONE IN
THE HOUSE, BANGING ON THE DOOR, REALLY BIG BANGING, KIND OF
HALLOWEEN STYLE. AND I CAME DOWNSTAIRS AND
THERE’S A MASSIVE, A VERY GOOD-LOOKING POLICEMAN STANDING
OUTSIDE OUR PORCH, WHICH IS WEIRD BECAUSE OUR PLACE IS WAY
IN THE WILDS. AND I OPENED THE DOOR. AND HE SAYS, “I’M TERRIBLY SORRY
TO BOTHER YOU, MRS. THOMPSON, BUT WE’VE HAD A REPORT THAT YOU
HAD AN INTRUDER ON YOUR PROPERTY TODAY.” AND I SAID, “AN INTRUDER?”
I IMMEDIATELY TURNED INTO JAMIE LEE CURTIS, IMMEDIATELY. AND I REACH FOR THE NEAREST
WEAPON. I HID MY DAUGHTER IN THE
CUPBOARD. I SAID, “WHAT KIND OF INTRUDER?”
AND HE SAID, “WELL, SHE SAID IT WAS A NAKED MAN, ABOUT 50 YEARS
OLD.” ( LAUGHTER )
SO I– I LOOKED AT THIS POLICEMAN, AND I THOUGHT YOU
KNOW WHAT? WHAT WAS GOING THROUGH MY MIND
WAS FROM A DISTANCE, MY BOOBS HAVE DROPPED SO FAR THEY READ AS
TESTICLES. ( LAUGHTER )
AND I NEARLY– ♪ ♪ ♪
THANK YOU SO MUCH. THANK YOU FOR ITTHA THAT RIFF. BOOBS, TESTICLES, RIFF. DA-DA-DA! BAD, BAD, REALLY BAD, LIKE MINOR
CHORD. I’VE NEVER RECOVERED. I KEEP TRYING TO FIND THAT
POLICEMAN. HE WAS GORGEOUS. AND THEN HE SAID TO ME, “IT’S
ALL RIGHT. I’M SO SORRY. SHE DOESN’T SEE VERY WELL.” MY DAUGHTER SAID, “MOM, THAT’S
ABOUT THE TIME YOU CAME BACK FROM–” “SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” THE SHEEP WERE ALL
OUT THERE AT THAT POINT GOING, “IT WAS HER! IT WAS HER.” THEY HAVE NO LOYALTY.>>Stephen: NOW YOU HAVE A NEW
FILM WITH MINDY KALING.>>YESTERDAY, THE WONDERFUL
MINDY KALING.>>Stephen: IT’S CALLED “LATE
NIGHT,” AND YOU PLAY KATHERINE NEWBURY, WHO IS THE HOST OF A
SHOWED CALLED “TONIGHT,” IN THE UNITED STATES.>>YUP.>>Stephen: AND WE HAVE A CLIP
HERE. YOU’RE IN THE WRITER’S ROOM. YOU CAN TELL WHAT’S GOING ON IN
THIS CLIP? WHY ARE YOU IN WITH THE WRITERS?>>BECAUSE SHE’S LOST HER MOAJO,
REALLY. AND SHE NEEDS TO MAKE THE SHOW
BETTER BECAUSE SHE’S BEEN THREATENED WITH IT BEING CUT,
AND SHE CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT IT. IT’S HER ONLY THING.>>Stephen: SHE’S THE MAINSTAY
OF LATE NIGHT. SHE’S BEEN THERE 20 YEARS.>>YES, SO IT’S BASICALLY
SCIENCE FICTION. ( LAUGHTER )
DID YOU SEE THE WAY I SLIPPED THAT IN. SNEAKY. SNEAKY LITTLE POLITICAL REMARK
THERE FROM DAME THOMPSON.>>Stephen: WE DON’T NEED
POLITICS IN LATE NIGHT.>>OH, NO, WE REALLY DON’T. GOOD GRIEF. ANYWAY, SO SHE’S COME INTO THE
WRITERS’ ROOM TO TALK TO THEM AND GIVE THEM A ROW AND SAY,
“YOU’VE GOT TO MAKE THIS BETTER.”>>Stephen: JAMES.>>IF I MAY, I JUST WANT TO SAY,
IT IS SUCH AN HONOR TO MEET YOU, MISS NEW BER. I’M CHRIS REYNOLDS.>>WHEN MY PARENTS GOT
DIVORCED–>>I DON’T KNOW WHO ANY OF YOU
ARE. I DON’T KNOW WHO ANY OF THEM
ARE.>>OH, WELL TOM. I’M– I’M TOM. I WRITE THE MONOLOGUE. I’M ACTUALLY THE YOUNGEST
MONOLOGUE WRITER IN THE HISTORY OF THE SHOW.>>I DON’T CARE.>>OKAY.>>DO YOU KNOW I’M NOT GOING TO
REMEMBER ANY OF THIS. HERE’S WHAT WE’RE GOING TO DO. YOU’RE ONE, TWO, THREE. FOUR.>>HI, CATHERINE.>>OH, THANK GOD. HOW IS YOUR BABY?>>SHE’S 27. ( LAUGHTER ).>>Stephen: TRUE. ALL OF IT. TRUE TO LIFE. ( APPLAUSE )
>>BUT YOU SEE, I THINK IT IS TRUE TO LIFE.>>Stephen: A LITTLE BIT.>>A LITTLE BIT.>>Stephen: FROM SEEING THIS,
DID IT MAKE YOU WANT TO HOST A LATE-NIGHT SHOW? DOES IT APPEAL TO YOU ATALLY.>>HAVING DONE “S.N.L.” RECENTLY–
( APPLAUSE ) DID YOU SEE IT? IT’S IRRELEVANT TO THIS
INTERVIEW, BUT THANK YOU VERY MUCH, I REALLY APPRECIATE IT. THANK YOU FOR WATCHING. BUT IT WAS SO INTERESTING
WATCHING THE WRITERS, THAT PROCESS OF THEM WRITING AND
THINKING AND CREATING ALL NIGHT. AND YOU JUST THINK THIS IS SO
IMPORTANT, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE YOU THINK ABOUT LAUGHING. MARK TWAIN, RIGHT, YOU KNOW THAT
BIT?>>Stephen: I’M FAMILIAR WITH
HIS WORK.>>THERE’S A CHARACTER– AND I
CAN’T REMEMBER WHAT THE WORK IS– BUT IT’S SATAN AND HE’S
TALKING TO HUMAN BEINGS AND HE’S SAYS, “YOU KNOW, YOU PEOPLE,
YOU’RE A BIS PATHET.>>BUT YOU DO HAVE ONE POWERFUL
WEAPON, AND THAT IS LAUGHTER. BECAUSE YOU CAN PUSH AT HUMBUG
AND IDIOCY AND POWER WITH WORDS WSUPPLICATION, WITH PERSUASION,
BUT ONLY”– THIS IS WHAT HE SAYS. I LOVE THIS. “ONLY LAUGHTER WILL BLOW IT TO
RAGS AND ATOMS AT A BLAST AGAINST THE ASSAULT OF LAUGHTER,
NOTHING CAN STAND.” WHICH, OF COURSE, IS UNTRUE,
BECAUSE YOU HAVE TRUMP, AND WE LAUGHED AND LAUGHED AND LAUGHED. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>Stephen: WELL SAID. BUT IT’S A NICE THOUGHT.>>YOU TRY. IT’S A NICE THOUGHT.>>Stephen: “LATE NIGHT” IS IN
THEATERS JUNE 7. EMMA THOMPSON, EVERYBODY! WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK

100 thoughts on “How Emma Thompson Prepared For ‘Late Night’

  1. She's probably one of the very few people in this world who are so extra and not only don't i mind it at all, but i am amazed but her energy and comedic talent and i want to hear her tell stories all the time!

  2. Dame Emma, please never change. We love your sass and your theatrics. 😂 Since Ang Lee's 'Sense and Sensibility', I've been a fan of her work and humor. Top notch!

  3. That entrance was EVERYTHING. She has such balls for a Dame! You gotta love Colbert knowing he was just basking in her glow

  4. I love how Emma just casually throws out there that She “knew his dad quite well” about William 😂

  5. If you’re not yet in love with this lovely creature go watch Sense and Sensibility. I guarantee you you will fall head over heels.

  6. Emma totally owed this interview Colbert is a crap interviewer Emma told him stories and was very funny and he just dismissed them and got on with next question what an absolute tool. Emma is an absolute legend what a vary humble and down to earth woman she is.

  7. I really love her, its a shame she is English. Most horrible, uneducated people in Europe.
    For people who don't know what i am talking about, just go outside London.

  8. it's irrelevant to this interview and her awesome personality, but I LOVE her blouse and earrings!

  9. Ummm…i just found out she adopted a refugee in 2005 who was an ACTUAL child soldier. She. Is. Freaking. Amazing.

  10. I want to comment on todays soccer games compared to soccer games back in the early days up to the mid 20th century. I don't know why they keep changing the rules taking the fun out of the game, in real soccer a foul is not when one player decides to fall down and get a free kick or PK, there's also a rule in soccer called a ball to hand that is when a player kicks the ball on your arm you can't react fast enough to move your arm so its a no call i saw referees giving PK for ball to hand ,where is the real fun in soccer ,soccer to me these days are a bunch of spoil brad running around on the field crying like a baby. A referee should know what a real deliberate action is on the field from one player to another than the bull crap I've been seen in these games,I'm sure fellow passed time soccer players agreed with me, its unbearable for me to watch todays cry babies pretending they're playing soccer, I truly enjoyed watching the women play today than the so called actors in the male teams.

  11. Well, stop illegal immigration, secure the border, reject open borders, tighten asylum, end sanctuary cities, and respect US citizenship, US citizens, and legal immigrants, and you won't have Trump anymore. Really quite simple.

  12. Mrs. Thomson,
    You are very beatiful.
    But why don't you make normal movements.
    You are special.
    —————————😏——————–

  13. I was so not expecting to hear that Scottish accent from Dame Emma lol Somehow this made her even more charming 😀

  14. Here's a classic Emma Thompson moment when she describes how she terrified Stephen Fry. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSRy3J1YMS0

  15. Yes, she's a gem. Brilliant on so many fronts. But I have to say it, she's a tad over the top in this one – unless she's drunk, that is. When it comes to comic timing, no-one beats Colbert.

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