Laughter is the Best Medicine

Hungama (HD) | Hindi Movies 2016 Full Movie | Akshaye Khanna Movies | Bollywood Comedy Movies

Fun and excitement… Fun and excitement… all the fun and excitement Fun and excitement… all the fun and excitement Is it love, or a battle?
A colour you can’t see… I can figure out nothing, Lord! Everyone’s all tied up,
what predicament is this? They walk together,
and yet is there a tussle Everyone’s all tied up,
what predicament is this? They walk together,
and yet is there a tussle To make them see reason… is difficult to
make them see reason The actors that
perform in this play… they do perform a drama Fun and excitement… all the fun and excitement Hurry! It’s time for school Jungle! Rascal! Idiot!
– Step on the brakes! You’re a girl, and you abuse me?
– You want me to applaud you? Why did you push me?
– When did I? You ran into me You deliberately rammed into
me and now you’re talking back! I know roadside loafers like you.
You see a girl and get into the act! Watch your tongue! You broke
the button on my shirt… and now you’re calling me a loafer?
Where will I get a button from? How about the dress which you spoilt?
You know what the laundry bill comes to? Can’t you wash your own clothes?
– Had I the time… I’d show you what else I can wash.
– Go, get lost Get going!
– Go, go away God! I didn’t know
you’d have such daring You came away to Mumbai
without telling anyone at home What would you have
done if I wasn’t here? It didn’t occur to me at all.
Had I stayed there another day… my mother would’ve got me married
to the local landlord’s son So what’s wrong? You have
to marry someone, don’t you? But that chap’s a
nut. He’s a real moron My father had borrowed a lot
of money from his father… for my education and
for my mother’s treatment My father died under
the burden of the debt… and he’s now pestering my mother. He
says, if you can’t repay the debt… have your daughter
married to my son He doesn’t even want any dowry.
– You mean your life is… the sum total of the
debt and the interest So what do you want to do?
– I must find a job at any cost I’ve got to repay the debt
and get rid of the landlord Any job will do.
– Easier said than done, Anjali I’m living here with a
friend who’s an air-hostess She’ll be here by 10:30 next
Friday. Till then, you can stay here But once she arrives, it’ll be
difficult for you to live here I’m sorry, but you mustn’t
take that badly, Anjali I’ve got enough money to see
me through a couple of months If only I could find a
room till I find a job Let’s see what we can do.
I’m getting late. I must leave When love is one-sided…
it’s a punishment When love is one-sided…
it’s a punishment When love is requited, it’s fun Quiet! We’re talking about life
and death and you’re hollering away! Come around, darling.
– No So it has to do with love!
I’ll sing a romantic number… the lady will immediately agree.
– I’ve agreed. For a divorce I’m not giving it to you!
– I’ve got great number for divorce… but it’s a bit romantic and…
– Sing it for your wife! Now sing a song for losses! You’re more of a mosquito repellent!
You’ve been driving the customers away I’ll be a great singer some
day, sir. That is my dream Pipe-dream. Go away –
Today’s the 4th., sir… When did I say it’s the 34th?
– My salary? I have it all worked out.
300 bucks. Let me have it But we settled at 4000 rupees.
– Sure, we did You do get a salary of 4000.
But who pays for your stay here? Who pays for your
food and your laundry? It works out to 4300. Your salary’s
4000. So let me have 300 rupees But this is a fraud, sir!
– Really? So go and find
another job. Get lost! Hey Bholu! Your milk’s getting
thinner and thinner every day Are you pouring water in it? I swear, I’ve never
adulterated milk with water But yes, I do adulterate
water with milk Buy it, if you can
afford it. Or forget it Hello, Nandu! How are you? Why
don’t you sing a song as usual? Sing, my foot! I’ve heard the
mosquitoes singing all night Don’t you have a
mosquito net in the room? Forget a mosquito net, it
doesn’t even have a roof and walls I slept on the railway platform.
– You must think of me at such times I have a great place.
It’s going cheap But you’ll need to pay
me a commission for that 500 rupees.
– I will. But where is it? I’ll show you… do you have a wife?
– Wife?! You know Popat, the moneylender?
He lets out his room very cheap But only to married couples.
– Why? Because his wife’s an amazing dish.
He’s terribly suspicious about her Where will I find a wife?
– Am I not here? You’re crazy! If I tell
Popat that you’re my wife… What rubbish! What I’m saying
is that I’ll find you a wife I’ll charge extra
commission for that. – Are you a milkman or a commission agent?
– I’m an all rounder You indeed are a fast guy Where’s the other lady?
– She’s taking a bath Quickly take the milk.
I’ve got work to do You’re the one I was waiting for, Bholu.
– What is the matter? That’s my friend, Anjali.
She’s looking for a room Low rent. Will you find one?
– There is a room. Very cheap But only for married couples Are you married?
– No She doesn’t know anyone in
town. But Bholu knows everyone Bholu, Bholu the good boy…
– That’s enough Will you give me a commission?
– I will All right, I’ll find a
fake-husband for her then So you’re thinking
of leaving your house? Strange games God
plays. Here I am… waiting to quit the dingy hole I’m
living in and settling in a palace And you! You’re quitting
a readymade palace If you had a father like mine… you’d have found my palace to
be smaller than your dingy hole But what is the problem?
– Ever since I’ve finished college… I’ve been begging for
money to start a business Whenever I talk about money, it’s
as if I’ve stepped on his tail! This is the limit!
– You have just one way, my friend Change your father.
– What? Woo a rich girl, get married and
become the heir to her father’s riches You’re poking fun at me?
– I’m not kidding I’ve even scored with a girl.
Teja, the garbage king’s daughter You’ve heard of him, haven’t you?
It’s his only daughter. Madhuri The garbage king’s daughter and
you? Don’t forget your status Do you even have the money to buy
her a box to collect the garbage? I don’t, but Radhesham Tiwaris son
can buy even the garbage king… not just a garbage can. Tiwari? Owner of Anjali Industries? Right. Anjali Foods, Anjali
Chemicals, Anjali Pharmaceuticals… and several other Anjalis
under my father’s belt You told her that you are
Radhesham Tiwaris son? – Yes. Don’t lose hope, my friend The more thick-skinned you are in
money matters, the better it is for you Harass your father so
much with your demands… he’ll give you something
some day or the other Dad, one last time. Are you
giving me the money or aren’t you? You’ve been asking me for years
and I didn’t give you anything Here you are. Start whatever
business you want to with this 10 rupees! You’re poking fun at me?
– Hear that? He thinks 10 rupees is too little!
My grandfather ran the family with it My father arrived in this
city with just 10 rupees And this is just
what I got in my dowry Ma, say something. Please.
– What will I say, my son? I asked him for a diamond necklace.
He didn’t give that to me either He sold the land in the village
yesterday. He got eight million Let alone taking a look, I
didn’t even get to smell the money He’s put it all in the safe.
– Shout! Yell as much as you want to There’s eight million
lying in the house… and you refuse to give me 750,000? I spend a lot of money… in your education,
boarding and maintenance You aren’t getting a penny more Who will give me the
money, if not you, Papa? What will I do?
– Rob and steal But don’t ask me for the money.
– I can’t take it anymore If you don’t give me the
money, I’m leaving this house Sure, go away.
– I’m leaving! I’ve made enquiries. Radhesham Tiwaris
bungalow in Pali Hill is lying vacant There’s no one there
except a care-taker When the garbage king gets to know,
he’ll put you through a ringer! I’ll marry Madhuri
before he does that Once the marriage has taken
place, it’ll all be over He’s the bride’s
father. The only daughter What will he do? He’ll have
to accept me as his son-in-law Are you out of your mind? First tell me what’s to be
done with my father, the villain Did you ask him for the money?
– Have I been talking in Hebrew? He’s sitting on his money like a
snake. He won’t give me a penny! What did he have to say?
– He asks me to rob and steal He’ll fight my case for free.
– Nice idea So rob and steal. Best
business. No capital required What does he do for a living?
– With a tanpura around his neck… he goes around singing.
– You mean he’s a beggar! I’ll have to live with a beggar?
– No beggar, a large-hearted man Here he comes Sorry, I’m late You?
– You! So you know each other? That’s
good. There won’t be any problem then I’m not staying with this thug! You think I’ll willingly
move in with a witch? You call me a witch?
– No, you are a witch’s mother… a grandmother, everything.
You’re from a family of witches! Priya, let’s go.
– Anjali… don’t act like a child. My
roommate is arriving tomorrow You must somehow find a place! Adjust with him for now later,
we’ll find another place. Hey boss… listen to me In Bombay, you got to pay
even to sleep on the pavements And that’s so dangerous. If someone
drives over, you’re dead and gone Bholu, she agrees.
– So does he According to Popats condition, the two
of you must look like a married couple So here’s the bridal necklace.
That will cost another 50 rupees Here, put it on her Hey! I’m not letting any Tom Dick
or Harry put the necklace on me Let me put it on you then She’s waiting for a prince
to come along. Give it to her One minute. I’ll put it on her Popat-Seth, save my life! What’s the matter, Waghmare?
– I caught a thief with 50,000 rupees But I’m diabetic, you see.
I went to take a leak… and the thief escaped with the money.
– How? I have decided. I’m not going
to trust a thief ever again That’s right.
– You know what Inspector Rane says? He says I took 50,000 from the
thief and I helped him escape! Rane has gone an filed a First
Information Report against me! Do you I think I’m
that sort of a man? This is the first time… I’m
hearing of something like this. If I don’t keep 50,000
on Ranes table… I’ll lose my job!
– No, I’ll give you the money But I’ll charge 10 per cent interest.
– Why 10 per cent? I’ll return all the
money to you. I swear! I’ll take all the money. But
my interest will be 10 per cent 10 per cent?
– Yes And you’ll have to pawn something too.
– Sure, I’ve brought it The papers of my room
and the stamp papers How often have I
told you? Go inside! You see a stranger around
and you come running! Look, they’ve arrived Greetings. How are you?
– Greetings. When did you get married?
– Very recently And you said…
– It’s quite some time, really You don’t eat non-veg
food, do you? – No You won’t leave each other
and run away, will you? Are you in a cattle market,
sir? Why worry about such detail? Let me make it clear. She’s
the wife, he’s the husband Give them the keys, and the
commission to me. You get that? You’ve brought the advance?
– Sure, here it is All right. You can stay
here from today itself Dulari, show them to their room Murder of an elderly couple
for money. Servant arrested See this? When I asked you to do all
the chores and not employ servants… what did you say to
me? That I’m a miser But look at what you get
when you employ servants! You’ll sleep at home
and wake up in hell! Oh yes, nice heaven
l’m living with you in Jeetu, my son! You’ve come back! The way you left, I thought you’d
never look back at this house again Well? You went broke
and missed the free food? Have a couple of morsels if you
wish. But you’re not getting a penny! Daddy, I’m here to seek your
blessings and sweeten your tongue I’ve started a new business.
– Really? What business? Electronics, Mother. DVD players,
CD players… it’s a big showroom It must’ve taken a lot of investment?
– I invested 750,000… and the bank financed me
with the rest of the 6 million 750,000 rupees? Where
did you get the money? You are the one who showed
me the right path, daddy What path did I show you?
– You asked me to rob and steal So I did I got to know that there
was a lot of money in a house I went there in the dead of the night.
The husband and wife were fast asleep I took the key from under the pillow,
took the money from the safe… and kept the keys back! They must’ve called
the cops by now! They don’t even know as
yet. But now they’ll discover But which house did you rob, son?
– This one, Papa it’s the money you got from selling
the land? That’s the one I stole So you robbed your
father! Snake in the grass! When I asked him for it, he didn’t
give it to me. He asked me to steal Now how could a son
disobey his father? It was unaccounted money
anyway. Let the cops arrive I’ll tell them everything and the
two of us will go to jail together Tell me the truth.
Is he really my son? I’m convinced now!
He’s truly your son! My darling son… my
good boy aren’t you? Return Papas money, my son!
– That’s not possible Are you sure?
– Sure Get out of this house then!
– That’s what I came for Lord! Protect my son! I’m told that this house
is to be sublet. Is it true? Not true. Who are you? You walk into my house
and ask me who I am? There was this chap, Pandu… who
used to dust and swab the floor Isn’t he there?
– What work is it? It’s in his own interests.
He’d have made an extra buck But if he’s not here, I must leave Sir! Sir! I’m Pandu! Can’t you believe me? Here you are! So this is the real movie!
That was only a trailer? Pandus mysterious ways, sir.
Come on in, sir… welcome This way, please… As Lord Krishna says…
how about a small drink? No.
– I’ll have one Without any soda or water?
– No Nothing at all?
– No The boss has kept
the liquor for guests But the guests will come
only when the boss is here I didn’t want the booze to get
spoilt. I kept taking small drinks… and pouring in small
amounts of water. And now, there’s just water in it! Pandu, you’re a very smart man.
– Not at all, sir The moment I saw you, I
knew I had met a thief in you All I wanted to say to you was
that I was as good as you are You mentioned something about money You live here all alone, don’t you?
– Yes… the boss hasn’t even looked
at this place for years Despite being such a rich
man, he lives like a villager The lawyers and the managers carry
the accounts to him in the village To pay me a salary, he has maintained
such a big house in the city! If you could get some cream
apart from this salary… what do you think about it?
– Great idea In that case, Radhesham Tiwaris
son is living here from tomorrow Me Me! First class! Sheru, is your
information accurate? Absolutely certain, Garbage
King… I mean, Teja-bhai Who’s he?
– It’s Radhesham Tiwaris son Is it the Radhesham Tiwari of the
multi-million Anjali Industries? Yes.
– He said, he’ll marry you? Tell me the truth.
Else, I’ll kill you! He’s been wanting to meet you I swear it on the scales!
You’re really my little girl! I knew you’d find a
gem even in the garbage! Hey! Get out!
– This is my bed! Your bed? I pay half
the rent of this house! Does the other half
land from the skies? All right. Let’s draw lots
with your name and mine Whichever name the chit comes
up with, gets the bed. Okay? All right. Go ahead One moment. I’ll pick it.
– All right. As you wish you Anjali! Now move… Go away What are you staring for? Go away Get up… what are you up to?
– What? Can’t you sleep quietly?
– When I lie on the floor… the cold gets to my bones
and I start snoring. Like this it’s more like an explosion!
I need quiet when I sleep! So go and sleep on the roof! I
can’t sleep quietly on the floor All right, go and rot in the bed I need peace, not a
bed to sleep on! Go on! Pandu… The garbage! Wash your eyes!
– It’s the garbage king! Remember what I told you? You
won’t get a penny if you mess up. Hurry up now! Hello, sir, hello Mr. Anil?
– He’s on the phone Don’t keep calling me
for 15 or 20 million Take it from the
drawer in my office What happened about the
car? The Ferrari? No way it’s become very common
nowadays. Sachin has one too I want a Rolls
Royce. Three, in fact One for me, one for my daddy… and I want to donate one
to my future father-in-law I’m Teja-bhai.
– Who? The garbage…
– Garbage! Sorry… there’s no garbage here. Go away.
– I’m Madhuris father Father-in-law! I’m sorry,
I did not recognize you it’s okay, you’ll get to know me.
My daughter has told me everything What a gem my daughter has
found! You’ll make a great couple! So when do we have the marriage?
– As early as possible… But we’ll have to tell
your parents. Won’t we? That’s the problem My parents want me to marry into
a family of big industrialists They’ve even taken my birth chart.
But I’ve told them in plain terms If there’s anyone I’ll
marry, it’s Madhuri! That’s for sure.
– So what are we to do? Get married, at the earliest. That’s it.
– And how about your daddy? Once we’re married, what will
he be able to do about it? Even if he does, my boss still
has 500 million to his name Till the marriage they all act
funny. They accept everything later In your shoes, this is
just what I’d have done, son That’s why I’ve taken the
risk. Of getting married So let’s have the engagement
tomorrow. You can exchange rings We’ll find a nice day
and have you married But don’t say a word to your
Papa before all this happens Come, let’s sweeten our tongues.
– Yes, let’s go Only after everything is over
will they get to know the truth Mr. Sahay from the city is here.
– All right Tell Ramdin to keep the
calf away from the cow It drinks up all the milk.
– Very well, madam Listen…
– Lovely voice You never said that to me earlier Not you, my dear woman… I’m
talking about Ustad Aamir Khan. Will you shut him up now?
There are guests waiting for you How can you say such things
about a luminary like him? I’ve started businesses in
your name all over the world… and you won’t use
your brains at all? Do you have something in your
brains? Or are you bankrupt already? Enough of your songs. Chandrakant
and Renuka are waiting for you You ought to have told me! You
just keep talking any nonsense Anjali, you are simply
taking the trouble No trouble. You’re more a
friend than an AIDS virus Not AIDS virus,
Anjali. She’s an advisor Call her a legal advisor! It’s the same thing
– Is it really? You can’t tell a
bear from a potato! In there, I was talking about
Aamir Khan. You must know about him? Aamir Khan? Who
hasn’t heard of him? – I’m a huge fan of his
– See? Now this is a well-informed man As for her, the cattle, the fodder
and the cow dung… that’s her world It isn’t her fault,
actually. It’s your mistake You didn’t expose
her to the city at all How will she know about the world
in the confines of the four walls? That’s not the case,
sister-in-law. – That’s how it is Why did you send your son
and daughter to London? I was born in the city and
I will stay here till I die But it’s different
with the children. They’ve got to keep up with the
world… move ahead in life, so… I hope you don’t have to… go through what happened
Anandilal Kitpitia did What happened? Like you, Anandilal Kitpitia
sent his sons to London. To study. The old couple
lived in the village The children went on to
become very modern, hi-fi… and the old couple
were still raw villagers When the children
returned from abroad… they couldn’t adjust themselves
to the local conditions They were ashamed of their
parents. Forget living together… they weren’t even willing
to call them Mummy and Daddy And one day the children screamed
You bloody Indians and went away The children never looked
at their parents again They kept yearning till they died.
– God! If my children treat me like
that, it’s going to kill me! I’ve told him so often
to move to the city… to learn the way of life there.
Let’s go to the city, please Even if it’s only for a month.
– All right, don’t be stubborn Anandilal Katpitia…
– I’ll think about it Give me the papers.
– Here are all the reports I’ll bring the case papers of
Anjali Chemicals next week. – Okay. We must leave now.
– Very well Do call me if you meet Aamir Khan.
I want a photograph taken with him But he’s dead.
– How’s that possible? I saw Lagaan only recently.
– Lagaan? I’ve been… it’s Ustad
Aamir… have you ever heard him? Let’s go. We might miss the bus! You are all alike!
Lagaan! What Lagaan? Saved! The ceremony is over!
– What are you saying? I say, it’s nice Ten days later is an auspicious date.
We’ll have the wedding on that day I’m the one who’s eating this
paratha. So you needn’t laugh I don’t need your
permission to laugh! Those who laugh
belong in a loony bin! And broken parathas
belong in the garbage bin! My parathas are neither burnt
nor broken. I’ll eat all I want Is someone there? The man and wife have left the lights
and fans on, to have a honeymoon! How are you? Is
everything all right? Any problem? What aroma is that? What’s
cooking? Potato-pancakes? Yes When we were just married,
Dulari made some for me too Her mother died the
moment she ate one Ever since, potato-pancakes
have been a no-no in my house My wife makes nice
ones. Will you have some? Would you like one?
– No, you’ll be left hungry Oh no, have some!
– I hope your wife doesn’t mind? Do you mind, lady?
– Oh no, not at all See? Bring it up. Quick! Hurry up, darling! We’re hungry What’s one going to do?
One moment. There’s more Not burnt, not broken… steaming hot
pancakes! Here you are! For you and your wife.
– Some chutney? Sure, there is Take it all away. We’ll
take the bowl later Yogurt?
– We don’t have any It’s ok. Even if it’s in pieces and burnt,
I can eat to my heart’s content I’ll fix you! Here you are! And I
went mad looking for you! In the bank, in the bar…
– You’ll have your money Let the marriage take place first. No marriage! Only destruction! Are you already drunk in the day? I’ve only drunk, but when he
arrives tomorrow, I’ll be buried! What rubbish! Who’s arriving? Your father Radhesham Tiwari He’s arriving with his wife!
– What am I going to do? Go underground. Quit the city.
If possible, quit the world! Right now, go away from here!
– What are you telling me? That old man can’t do without cows,
buffaloes, fodder and the works He’ll stay in the city
for a week, at the most So disappear for a week!
– That’s an expensive proposition Living in style, I’m
already deep in debt Pawn the ring garbage gave you
and check into a cheap lodge it’s only for a week! Isn’t that right?
Of course it’s right! What? You’re going away
to London? For a week? What’s the hurry? For business? To make money?
Of course, you must go ahead Take care of yourself
in the aircraft Don’t thrust your arm outside the
window. Yes, I’ll tell Madhuri… go ahead and make money. Bye Master is here!
– So this is our Pandu? How have you been, Pandu?
– Your blessings, sir Greetings.
– Welcome, sir What’s happening here?
– This is our manager, Mr. KC Shukla This is your first visit to our
city, so this is a small welcome You must be tired,
sir. We’ll leave now What for? I want to
get to know all of you Please come in, all of you Where are you going, Pandu?
Go and fetch the luggage For a week or two… how much
luggage must he be carrying? Who told you?
– So? Sir’s going to live
here now. Forever What happened? Fetch
the luggage. – Nothing. God, nice way you’ve found
of snatching my livelihood The things he did so he
could sleep on the bed! He now sits quietly! But at
least I can sleep in peace Not a drop of water here Let me tell you
what I must today… Let me tell you
what I must today… let your heart remain with me let your heart remain with me Let me tell you
what I must today… Let me tell you
what I must today… let my heart remain with me My eyes are glued to your face… to your face, I’ve lost my heart You are the one…
who lives in my heart Pining torments me… I feel scared Your sweet words might
yet cast a spell on me Let me bear the
sweet pain of love… Let me bear the
sweet pain of love… let your heart remain with me let your heart remain with me Let me tell you
what I must today… Let me tell you
what I must today… let my heart remain with you let my heart remain with you Lay off! I’m being forced to live with you! I know you’re not a decent man… but I thought you had some
manners. You have proved me wrong! Don’t even talk to me again! Don’t ever talk to me! Stop it! Is that the beat?
Or are you killing flies? Don’t do something you can’t!
– So why are you doing it? Shut up!
– I was following you with the beat Don’t follow me.
Accompany me with the beat Get it? If tune is the mother,
the rhythm is the father One who doesn’t get
it is good for nothing The bell.
– The door’s over there Want me to send you packing?
– I forgot! Whom do you wish to see? The mistress! Who are you, sister?
– It’s me! Who are you, sister?
– Radhesham Tiwaris… Shut up! Who are you, sister?
– I’m Mrs. Anjali Tiwari I’m glad your name hasn’t changed I’ve made Anjali a
member of the Wild Forest The forest?
– No, it’s a club. A social club Now that we’re here, we must
learn the ways of this city The women in this city
aren’t lizards on the walls They do a lot of social work. What’s surprising is that… everyone there knew Anjali beforehand.
– Is it? The moment we stepped in,
everyone shook hands and said… What’s more? He too recognized
me and shook hands with me! That’s when I realized what a
huge business empire we’re running Who was the unfortunate man? Shah Rukh.
– Hungry who? Shah Rukh. The Khan. Film-star All the film stars come there.
– We must live in style now No style for me.
– Bring a bat into the house… it’ll still hang from a
tree when it goes to sleep! Pandu, you get no salary next month.
– It’s a saying, sir! The saying is, bathe as much as the
crow wishes to, it can’t become a swan! That’s true!
– I’ll bathe and get ready We’ve got to go to the dance class.
– Dance class? At this age? You’ll sprain your waist! Let it be it’s an English dance. Like this! A new way of sweeping the floor?
– See? He starts a fight whenever
I want to do something nice That’s the only difference
between marriage and war In a marriage, you get
to sleep with the enemy Anjali darling… mercy! What’s happening here?
– The English dance If you jump around at this age and
something happens, I’ll have to pay up Nothing’s happening to me.
– I’m talking about the tiles, not you Quiet! High society
women dance every day… to keep their bodies fit.
I suggest, you dance too Me?
– Yes. Don’t we live in Mumbai? We must learn to live in style.
Look at your managers and officers They live in such style.
You are their employer… and yet you go around half
naked! Don’t you feel ashamed? I wear what clothes are
necessary to cover my body And look at your body! It’s sagging Take a walk every morning. Buy a
dog, to throw your weight around You can take a walk with me then.
– You just won’t take me seriously I’ve wasted a lot of years in
the village with cattle and fodder I can’t take all that now.
Just watch what Anjali does now I can see it all! Your obsession
with western culture has begun… I wonder where it will end! Radhesham Tiwaris from
your village, isn’t he? Who?
– The owner of Anjali Industries? Oh yes, he’s from my village.
– I’m told he’s in the city nowadays Go and meet him. Since you and
he are from the same village… out of sentiment, he
might give you a job Really?
– Give it a try You and his company
share the same name Maybe that will make him
happy and he’ll give you a job The third time he
has stopped singing! This thing has stalled
for the third time! The old one was good enough.
But you still bought a new system You’ve changed too. So
why not the CD-player? If you find a new woman,
will you throw me out? I’ll do that, if the need arises.
– Just you try I’ll show you. I’m the
mother of two children And people still say I
look like your daughter Be thankful they don’t
think I’m your grandfather Stop joking and bring a new woman!
It’ll become like your CD player! It’ll break down!
– What’s the number of this store? Radhe-Shyam. –
Praise the Lord This is Radhesham Tiwari speaking You’ve sold me a qawwali
in the name of a Thumri? In just a day, it’s broken
down. Colds, dysentery… You must see a doctor, sir.
This is the Videocon Gallery I’m talking about the CD-player…
the nuisance you sent to me No sorry. Pick up this trash
and get going immediately And send me a new one immediately No, no, sir. I’ll come
and personally check it Who you?
– Anjali… Anjali, yes… what
work do you have? I wish to meet Mr. Radhesham.
– Well? What’s the good news? For a job.
– We have a flourishing business He doesn’t need a job.
– No… I’m the one who wants a job.
Take a look at my certificates All right. The master’s very
busy right now. Come later Please…
– I told you! Go! I think I must wait a while If I get to meet Mr.
Radhesham, my work will be done Must be his daughter Know where the CD-player is? I’m here to repair it But I’m not a mechanic. I own
a store, I’ve got to check it Must be in there What airs! Spoilt brat! Hey, roving eyes… over here.
– Jeetendra from Videocon Over there The body’s lying here.
Take it away in a bier Take it away.
– I’ll take a look. Two minutes No need to take a look.
I told you, it’s dead Two minutes, I’ll check.
– No need to check. Don’t touch that It must be minor problem,
sir. Let me at least check it! Pick up the box and
get going. At once! Not to worry, sir. I’ll send
a salesman and have it replaced No, I want my money back! I don’t want any replacement.
I want my money back! He has left? One can’t
trust these city-guys at all! Greetings.
– Greetings. You? I wanted to meet you. But madam
told me that you’re very busy She’s a liar. I’m
always free. What is it? I’ve come here looking for a
job. Here are my certificates Wow! You’ve done M.A. And B.A. Classical music too! Wow! Haven’t you done your SSC?
– Of course, I have I was only kidding What sort of a job are you looking for?
– Anything will do All we need is a security guard And there’s no need for an M.A.
Or a B.A. For that, is there? Let’s clap Girl, you haven’t left?
– I… You keep out of this!
– Sir… He will talk any
nonsense. You get going Go away, I say!
– What are you doing? Is that the way you talk to guests? Have you forgotten your manners?
– I know my manners, mind you The poor girl…
– Poor girl? So give her half your wealth!
– Sure, I will! I won’t ask you!
– I know what’s on your mind! But I’m the Pandey family too.
I brought three cars full of gold Return it to me with interest
and do what you want to! In any case, I fed your guests and
took the vows to become your wife! God! This wife sure is a curse! She drove the poor girl away Why did you take the trouble? I told Mr. Radhesham to phone me…
I’d have the CD-player changed. But I’ve come here for a job You issued an ad, didn’t you? Sorry… I don’t understand I want this job The job? What are
you talking about? I need it very badly Where’s the need for Radhesham
Tiwaris daughter to take up a job? Looks like there is
a misunderstanding… I get it. I am an individual, I
have an identity of my own. Right? That’s a nice thing. I’ve seen
girls with that attitude of late Even if their father is a
millionaire, to prove your worth… you’ll work at pizza joints,
cafes and other places I’ll give you the job, if you wish.
But what will I be able to pay you? What’s 5000 rupees for you?
– 5000? I know it’s little.
But this business… Oh my God! I haven’t
even offered you a seat Come to my office, please If you speak the truth, you’ll blow
this last opportunity you’ve got I agree to work at 5000 rupees Your name?
– Anjali Anjali! So daddy has named
his business after his daughter Jeetu. Call me Jeetu.
– But… We’re going to be friends, okay? Stop playing with water and
get on with the work, Pandu Look, our new puppy.
– Wow! Where are you going with the hippo?
– No hippo, it’s my doggie And I’m asking the dog where
it’s going with the hippo? Shut up! Because I’m your wife,
you can’t talk any nonsense! You’re always acting
proud like a peacock But don’t forget. When the peacock
loses its feathers, it’s naked! Let’s go, puppy.
– You can laugh all you want to The things that
happen in this house! You? Here?
– Hasn’t Anil returned? The lodge… he’ll return
after a week from London You can come after a week.
– Let me meet Mr. Tiwari then We’re going to be relatives
soon. And we have to meet some day He’s not in right now.
– Where has he gone? To the market.
– He? To the market? The temple! To offer namaz!
– Namaz at the temple? No… to chant the Lord’s name.
– All right. I’ll wait here That’s no good. After the
prayer, he’ll take a bath Won’t be come home for a bath?
– Yes… no! He’ll bathe at the temple.
He has sworn it, you see There’s a well at the temple.
– He won’t drown in it, will he? He will come home, right?
– Yes, tomorrow! I’ll come tomorrow then.
– Sure? Why are you crying?
– Tears of happiness There’s going to be love
between the two of you I’ll come tomorrow Didn’t this garbage bin find
another time to spring here? Pandu, you’d rather vamoose.
Or you’re going to be dead Dead!
– God Someone from my village
was here to inform me Master, can you give me 5000
rupees? I’ll work and repay it Of course. I’ll give you the money Take a train and go to
the village immediately Or you’ll land in trouble Trouble will break out even
after I’ve left for the village Lord Ganesh, don’t think I’m flattering
You, but You can very well do it That girl Anjali…
make her fall for me She’s Tiwaris only daughter. If she
falls for me, it’ll be a huge lottery An order from Hotel New Horizon.
They want 50 sets of Videocon TV it’s 6 p.m. Let me drop you home No… I’ll take a bus I’ve got a car.
Why must you take a bus? C’mon… don’t think too much What happened?
– Nothing How can I go away,
until you go inside? Why not?
– I can see you then A coke, please Some chips, please Come. Mister, watch the
movie ahead. Not here I’m not an enemy… I’m not an enemy… why have you driven me crazy? Why have you driven me crazy? I’m a friend… I’m a friend… so why’ve you stolen my heart? So why’ve you stolen my heart? I was out one day,
straying from the path… when colorful roses
of love blossomed All distances were finished.
We began to get closer Such was our state, we
began to breathe faster I’m not among your assassins… I’m not among your assassins… so why’ve you thrust me
among those that live? I’m a friend… I’m a friend… so why’ve you stolen my heart? So why’ve you stolen my heart? I’ve lost my heart, although
it all began as a joke I’ve forgotten the world
to lose myself in your love I wonder how I will
tell you about my love… how will I profess my love to you? I live in your heart… I live in your heart… so why have you given
my heart a sweet pain? So why have you given
my heart a sweet pain? I’m the beautiful
moonlight everyone covets… God alone knows who I was born for My desire is a writing on the wall So there will be victory and
defeat in this game of love I rock in your arms… I rock in your arms… yet, why do you accuse me? Yet, why do you accuse me? I’m not an enemy… I’m a friend… so why’ve you driven me crazy? So why’ve you driven me crazy? Why’ve you stolen my heart? Why’ve you stolen my heart? Can’t you sit without
clinging to the girl? Can’t you sit without
clinging to her? Is she your sister?
– She’s my wife! So what are you going to do? What? What wife, son? Your beard says
it all. You weren’t married ever You baldie! Who the hell are you? Who the hell are you to ask me?
– Forget me. Who are you? Who are you? Whoever you guys are, I’ve
bought a ticket to sleep in peace Not to watch the movie!
Go outside and fight! Where will I get a rampuri? I don’t know Bhelpuri,
paani-puri, you get there. I’m talking about a knife! Where will I get one?
– Don’t do anything rash, boss I’ve decided. If I see him with
Anjali again, I’m going to kill him Either he lives, or I…
– Master, master… he’s her boss She has only respect for him.
She’s not in love with him How do you know?
– I see them everyday in a restaurant Which restaurant? He escaped But if he looks at you again,
he’s going to walk on his hands He doesn’t know what
stuff I’m made of Forget it. There you go again.
– No, Anjali I can’t tolerate anyone
teasing you. I’ll kill him! Now look… Jeetu… Why? What happened?
– Let’s go, please What is it?
– What is it? What’s biting you?
– What’s biting you? What’s biting you, tell me?
– You tell me what’s biting you How did you get here?
– Walking. What’s it to you? Walking? You’ll run away now!
Why’ve you standing between us? Why? You own the place?
– Yes, this is my father’s pad. So? It’s my grandfather’s pad, so?
– You got the nerve, eh? You got it? Want me to show?
– All right, you show it Try and touch me.
– You try and touch me Don’t use my lines!
– You don’t use my lines Go away…
– Want me to show you? I’ll show it to you.
– Go on… get lost Want me to show you?
– Let me see! Coward! You don’t have the spine! Paper-tigers. They won’t
even touch each other You don’t know me.
– Who are you? I’ve seen so many
like you! Go away! Come here and talk to me! Pipsqueak I’ve seen so many
like you! Go away! Here I am! What do you want to say?
– What is it? What? I’m not scared of you! Oh God! I’m going to catch them today! God Almighty! Why’ve you crying? Why’ve you hollering
away? What’s wrong? You ask me what’s happened? What
a thick-skinned man! Disgusting! Despite what you did, you
proudly stand before me! Aren’t you ashamed? Am I a virgin bride… to
feel shy without reason? Tell me clearly what has happened So you want to hear
it from my mouth? Is someone else around?
– Not the values I’ve imbibed… to utter disgusting things!
I’m from the Pandey family Keep crying! What were you doing with
that girl in the shrubs? Girl? What girl? I was
looking for my cane. Without your dhoti? You look so innocent! Butter
wouldn’t melt in your mouth! Tell me, who is that girl? I
don’t wear glasses like you! Tell me. For how long has this
game of hide n seek been going on? You drive the girl away
the moment you see me! How can you even think
of something so filthy? You can very well do it!
And I can’t even think of it! I have done nothing! Even if I have… it’s
a great thing I’ve done! You haven’t bought me… to expect me to watch the fun!
– So go away! Right now! All right, I’ll go away.
But first return to me… the 3 cars full of gold I brought
in dowry, along with interest I’ll go away after
that… Till then… I won’t let you have a ball!
– Shut up! What’s up, master? Did the
girl say something nasty to you? One thing is clear, Bholu.
She’s in love with her boss Not someone crazy like me I’m glad my craziness
has been of help How else could I have
made the world see reason? You’re getting disheartened
for no rhyme or reason She’s in love with you,
but she won’t tell you She wants to make you feel jealous.
– What sort of love is that? This game of love, you know About swimming across oceans
of fire and all that crap Take my advice. Fall in
love with another girl Want me to knock your teeth out?
– Don’t jump the gun Pretend to love someone else.
Like you’re burning in envy… she too will burn, if
she really loves you She’ll come running to you.
Take it from me in writing I’ve had it! Jeetu, my mother’s here If she sees me here,
all hell will break loose I said I was going to a computer class.
– Why? Because I haven’t told my
parents I’ve taken up a job here If she sees me…
– I get it, I get it Stay here, I’ll handle her Hello… welcome! Wow! You look beautiful! New sari! New pair of shoes! What can I do for you?
– Give me some music cassettes Music I can dance to.
– Sure, what do you want? No, I want only Western music!
A childhood habit, you see Know what? I’ll make a nice
collection and send it to your house I hope you know my address?
– Who doesn’t? Remember to send it
across. Please don’t forget Has she left?
– Has she? Phew! Saved! Jeetu, I got to leave early today.
– Why? Tomorrow’s my birthday Aren’t you inviting
your boss to the party? No, there’s no party. Actually,
I’ve got to out shopping Let’s go. I’ll accompany you.
– No, I’m expecting a friend You don’t want to invite
me to your birthday party… but I’m going to give
you a surprise surely Priya, Priya, Priya… My dear! I went crazy about you,
the moment I saw you I know, there are
obstacles in our path But rivers and streams
do flow down the mountains Like we have to unite some day You mean the life to me. I
love you more than my life You are dearest to my heart If she’s jealous, she’s in!
If she’s in, I’ve scored! Did you write this?
– Yes, but… Devil! You?
– I’m here to wish the birthday girl Fat roses! Who told you
today’s the birthday? You are a very special
customer. And we maintain records But there’s a mistake in your records.
– Really? The birthday’s tomorrow. Not today But I was told it’s today.
– Who told you? That’s what I heard.
– All right, all right Do come again tomorrow,
like you’ve come today You must. The first flowers
have been given by you, you see? That’s all right He has brought roses? And a letter? My dear Anjali. These
roses are a token of my love Roses arrive today, to
be followed by the bee I’m the one he’s
going to sting first How was it? What? My bouquet, of course.
– Bouquet? I gave it in your mummy’s
hands. Didn’t she give it to you? I see, that one? It was very nice Did you read the note
I left in the bouquet? The note? Yes, I did What did it say?
– Well… don’t you know?
– No, I mean… did you like it?
– Yes, of course. Very much So you don’t mind any
word I’ve written, do you? Mind? Why would I mind? So why did you lie to me?
– Lie? That yesterday was your birthday?
– Actually, Jeetu… You didn’t want to
invite me to the party That’s not true. There
was no party at all I know, because the party’s
tomorrow and so is your birthday Your mummy has invited me So you’re coming tomorrow?
– I won’t, if you don’t want me to You must! Why mustn’t you?
At what time did she say? At 7, she said.
– I see Know what? Come at 9.
– Why? The time has changed a bit I’ll be there at 9.
– All right If Jeetu had arrived before the
cake was cut, I’d have been exposed Why’ve you standing outside?
– Actually… I’m waiting for some friends of mine.
They don’t have the proper address Know what? Go in there
and enjoy the party I’ll join you as soon
as my friends arrive Of course! I’ll join
you in a few minutes He’s the same boy! Dad! I’ve had it! He’s hiding from me! So I was right This boy’s having an
affair with Anjali, I’m sure You’ve got your peace… all I’ve got is my craziness You’ve come to your senses… and I’m still in a daze But you’re the one
my heart still loves You’ve got your peace… all I’ve got is my craziness You’ve come to your senses… and I’m still in a daze But you’re the one
my heart still loves You’ve got your peace… all I’ve got is my craziness How am I going to placate it? My heart is crazy, it won’t relent How will I tell my heart? It does not know
what love is all about I’m obsessed with you…
and you don’t even realize it You got all the hospitality,
I was treated with indifference You’ve got back to your
senses, l’m still in a daze You’re the one my heart loves You’ve got your peace… all I’ve got is my craziness Here’s someone who
could die for her love… and there’s someone
who’s unfaithful in love What pain these distances give…
only in separation will we know Ever since I have seen
you, I’ve gone crazy You’ve got your sleep… I got only helplessness You’ve come to your senses… and I’m still in a daze But you’re the one
my heart still loves You’ve got your peace…
all I’ve got is my craziness You’ve come to your senses…
and I’m still in a daze You dare call that
boy to the party? You invited that witch too.
– Which one? The one your eyes were
glued to at the party! Wow! That’s a wolf
in sheep’s clothing! I can understand it from the
way your feet were moving and… the way your anklets were
chiming. Now that you’re exposed… you accuse me and find the excuse
of having fun with that young boy? The pot calling the kettle black! Speak! Who is that girl? I caught you in the shrubs,
so you cast mud at me… and try to save yourself?
Listen carefully! I’m not letting your scheme work!
I’ve had enough of your farce! You take me for a fool?
You think I’m an idiot? Just let me tell
you! I know how it is! It’s not going to work for long!
– All right Give me the gold I brought
with interest. I’ll go back! Go back! How about the expensive
saris I’ve given your horrible body? Who’s paying for the goodies you
helped yourself to over the years? I cooked for you all day and
night! My work pays for it all! You paint the town red with
strangers and talk back at me! The scores are leveled!
If you can do it, so can I! Will you do it? Will you?
– Yes, I will too! So will I!
– Go ahead and do it! Who’s stopping you? Just stop
interfering in my affairs! You mustn’t interfere either!
– I won’t! Hello.
– Hello I’m Teja-bhai.
– Please come in I haven’t recognized you. –
I’m your son’s father-in-law I don’t get it. I won’t beat around the
bush… and confuse you. I’ll come the point Don’t let your B.P. Get out
of hand when you listen to it That’s what I say. Come
straight to the point My daughter has decided
to marry your son What? Hello One moment. Your daughter
has decided to marry my son Right?
– Right So what can I do? Tell your
daughter to change her mind No, you don’t understand The two of them have got
together and taken this decision They’ve got engaged.
They’ve even exchanged rings What is he talking about?
– It can’t be our son Because our son is not here.
– I know Your son is in London.
– Right But your son was here.
– When did he go back? After the engagement,
he went away. On business I’ve sent my son to London for
further studies. Not business Now look, mister. What’s
happened is in the past Let’s peacefully and
amicably sort it out It can’t be sorted out, Teja-bhai. My son will marry
the girl I want him to You mean, whatever has happened…
– What has happened? They’ve just exchanged rings,
right? They haven’t got married yet He’ll throw the ring
away. End of the story How will he take off the ring? My daughter isn’t an empty bottle
whose label he can change at will Don’t talk too much!
From the look of you… I can tell how your daughter must be.
– Does she also sport a moustache? Radhesham Tiwari! If you’re
a big man, I don’t care! You don’t know Teja! I come
from a family of killers There wasn’t a day when my
father’s knife did not taste blood! His father was a butcher?
– You are insulting me! You’re still here? Shameless man,
go away. – L’ll go away! But I will surely come back! Listen…
– What? I’m talking to her, not you I suggest we call our son down here.
– Yes, call him here And see whether he obeys to you or me.
– Won’t you go away? L’m leaving. Don’t yell as if
you’re fighting the elections! Could there be some truth
in the rubbish he just spoke? Not at all. He’s just a fool Do you really think so?
– No Know what? We’ll telephone
him and call him over Wait! I’ve got to know the truth.
– What? That Anjali and you
are not man and wife Meaning?
– I’ve heard the bickering… that goes on between
the two of you. How would you know how happy
I am to learn the truth? We do keep fighting… but
we are really man and wife. I know everything. Look at this Miss Anjali Does anyone
address a married woman as Miss? Ever since you wrote that
letter to me, I understood… you would really marry me. You
will free me from Popats cage! Marry you? What if Popat gets to know?
– To hell with the old fossil! Anjalis coming You’re the one I was waiting
for. There’s a letter for you I thought I’d give it to you.
– Okay, I get it So this is the extent he has
gone to! But why must I care? Mother has written
to me from the village The landlord’s son will arrive.
He’ll marry me and take me away We’ll live in marital bliss My dear Anjali, I’m sending
Raja to you by tomorrow’s train You’ll get to know each other better,
if he stays with you for a few days He’s the one you’re
going to marry anyway Don’t forget, we’re alive today
because his family has helped us You will never disobey your mother.
You will agree to the wedding I’m sending you a photograph of
Raja. He’s no longer like he was… he has changed a lot. He has shaved
his beard, he now looks like a prince You’ll be stunned My prince will come to marry
me and I’ll dance in joy Another villain? Who the hell is he?
– Whoever He’ll marry Anjali and even
drive me out of the house I have an idea.
– What? Let’s scare him and
force him to return How? He’s the one. – So go and scare him!
– No, not here. It’s a crowded place Once I scare him, he won’t
step in Mumbai again. Come on What’s he up to? Has he gone mad? He’s cleaning something. The
shoe or the pole, I can’t say He’s stuck to it!
– He must be electrocuted! Go and save him!
– Are you crazy? You’ll die too Find a stick. One blow,
and he’ll be separated Is that why they tried to kill me? Yes. I brought you
here, because I liked you Anjali isn’t as
innocent as you think She’s having a terrific
scene with someone Who?
– The one who… He’s a very dangerous man.
Have you heard of Chhota Chetan? I saw the movie.
In 3-D. – Not that He’s from the underworld. Even
the cops are terrified of him He has committed 40 murders,
but he still hasn’t been caught He uses a new knife for every killing.
I saw him with a new one yesterday Maybe it’s meant for you.
– So why did Anjalis Ma send me here? They plan to bring you to
the city to bump you off Even if Anjali marries Chhota
Chetan after your death… her family has nothing to lose.
– No, that can’t be true Whether you believe it or
not, your body will believe me Is Raja here?
– Go to sleep Raja! Is there anyone here
answering to the name Raja? I’m going to finish him!
He’s hiding somewhere around My men have just broken
a few of his limbs He’s my 50th victim. I’m having
a grand party after killing him I’ll finish him if he comes
here. Tell him I was here Did you see?
– How would I? You covered my face! Why did you lie? You say he has
committed 40 murders, he says 50! Whatever! He has committed
the murders, not me Now get the hell out of here.
– How far is the railway station? I’ve got catch a train back home.
– No point in venturing out There’s a strike in the
railways. Can’t say when it’ll end So what am I to do?
– Hide somewhere here Chhota Chetan and his men will
look for you all over Mumbai So hide under an assumed name.
– But where will I hide? Find a cheap lodge near the railway
station. Hole up in one of them Catch the first train out
as soon as the strike is over Else, I’ll have to mail
your body to your village Believe me, or go to hell Welcome! Welcome, Teja-bhai Hey sonny… come here.
Let me show you something This is my son.
– This? Recognize him?
– No No? And he says he’s
your father-in-law! Ask him! Have I married your daughter?
– No Have I promised to marry her?
– No Tell me something…
are you weak in the head? No.
– So why did you kick up a fuss… that he had promised to marry
her? Why did you create a scene? Is he your son? Any doubts?
– No I have no doubt that he’s my son He’s not the one I spoke
about. It’s your other son What’s all that
about? Which other son? Your elder son!
– Look at him I have another son and I
don’t even know about it! You have a brother too!
– You are a big man… who runs a big business
empire. You must have forgotten But your other son lives
right here. Everyone knows that My God! What am I hearing? You have another son
outside my knowledge? This man is lying!
– He’s your son, all right Though he’s a bit dark of skin When I saw her, I
was a bit doubtful But anyone who looks at
you will say he’s your son The same eyes, the same
nose, The same lips… This is rubbish! Don’t scream! Call your servant,
Pandu. He knows everything He was witness to
everything. Where is Pandu? He’s gone to the village,
his father has died Died, or did you have him killed? You send him away when
you’re about to be exposed? I understand it all! It’s your
ploy to stall the marriage! Enough! Make anymore noise and
I’ll sue you for defamation! Shut up! You aren’t
Tiwari, you’re a disease! I’ve cured diseases like you!
I visit the courts every day Don’t forget, I come
from a family of killers Are you threatening me? Are you?
– Yes, I’m threatening you! So go and do what you can!
– You’ll know it very soon! In a week’s time, if you don’t let
the marriage take place… you’ll know! My God! I’m doomed! Mom! What are you doing? Am I supposed to stay
here or go back to London? My son, at what time is your flight?
– At eleven tonight, Mom Go away! If you stay here… you’re going to get spoilt
in your father’s shadow! Dad, I’m leaving. I’ll confirm
my ticket at the airport All right. God bless you Let’s get out of here. There’s
no meaning in staying here Let’s pack our bags and get going!
– Only after coming here… I’ve got to see your true colors!
– What rubbish are you talking? You don’t believe me and
you believe a stranger? I wouldn’t have believed it earlier But there’s no way I
cannot believe it now You are a flirt! Before our
marriage, you have been a womanizer! L’ll go back only when
I have all the proof! I’ll shave my moustache
if you leave this city! Your heart won’t relent
unless you see him! That bloody Videocon!
– My virtuous husband, aren’t you? You keep listening to
classical music all day… and this is what you do by
night? You are Satan himself! Wow! You accuse me? I’ve
seen your programmes already! A good thing, isn’t it? Keep
watching it… and kill me! God! She won’t die like
that… go to her help! Manager, do you have a room? Whatever it is, I shouldn’t
have to leave the room And I want an attached toilet Name? Raja… Tulsidas Khan What name is Tulsidas Khan?
– Shut up, scoundrel Your father’s name?
– Javed Chaurasia Your mother’s name?
– Mumtaz Bedi Are you the India-Pakistan border?
Were you born to cross parents? Shut up, or I’ll slap you!
– Is your old man dead? Of course, I’ll pay you And give me the keys,
quick. I badly want to pee And don’t tell anyone
that I’m staying here Pay for the cups you broke.
– Get lost Pay for the two cups you broke.
– I won’t! Get lost! Give that to me My umbrella! I’ll carry it for you.
– Not necessary The name is Babu Bisleri.
– I don’t want to bathe! I can’t trust anyone. Everyone
appears to be Chhota Chetans man They’re out to kill me! Anjali,
why did you do this to me? Why? Priya, what am I
going to do about Jeetu If I tell him the
truth, I’ll lose my job There’s a vacancy in my
office for a receptionist Your qualifications are the best
among the lot. I’m sure you’ll get it But you’ll have to
wait for a month. A month? What will I do with
Jeetu in a month? Don’t go to work at all. What if he visits Radheshams house? He’ll get to know the truth.
Which he has to, some day Ring him up and ask
him for leave of a month Tell him that your Papas suspicious That he sends the driver
with you everywhere When you finally land the
job, you can tell him the truth Sir, I’ve checked it
thoroughly. It’s first-class Since you sent me the new system
did I ever call you to tell you… that I wanted you to come
here and solve a problem? No, sir. You didn’t.
– No? So did you dream it had a problem? No? So why have you come here?
– Service check, to see if it’s okay I know there’s no problem with it.
– No problem What are you looking around for? Sir, isn’t Anjali there? So this is how it is! He calls a woman of his
mother’s age by her name! You do get along well, don’t you? We know each other very well, sir You must’ve met at your shop, right?
– No, sir… we’ve met mostly outside.
– Romeo and Juliet meeting outside! No wonder she goes
out all dressed up! Anjalis not in – Have you checked everything?
– Yes Is all the payment made?
– Yes Nothing outstanding?
– Not at all So what are you looking around for? That painting it’s lovely.
Must be very expensive? I don’t know, I stole it There’s the door Can I have a glass of water?
– No water supply for three days I’ve been drinking only coffee.
But there’s just a cup left. Anything else? I’ll come in a couple of days to
check whether there’s a problem No, you have given us enough trouble.
Don’t give us anymore trouble… we’ll bear the
trouble we already have If I could meet her mother,
maybe I could meet Anjali too Is the wife there, sir? My wife! Not the wife! It’s not a joint-account!
She’s all mine What I meant was…
– I know what you meant She’s not in right now.
Tell me what it is regarding Will you tell her I was
here, asking for her? Must I?
– Please don’t forget Oh no! I can’t forget
this till I die! Sister! She’s regaining
consciousness. Please call her husband There’s no need to worry. You got injuries in
the feet and head… because of which you’ve
been unconscious all day But the doctor has examined
you. Everything is all right How will I thank you?
– Why thank me? I just got here Thank your husband who’s
been here all night and day He didn’t budge from here. He
cried so much, he’s in a bad way You’ll be discharged in a day or
two. Look after yourself, okay? I must leave now it’s all my mistake.
Please forgive me Who’s that boy who has tainted
a virtuous woman like your wife? You! You fed her all the crap and
compelled her to come to the city! I didn’t want to set
foot in this city! I know the water in this
city is contaminated… and the people here are scoundrels!
– Sir… Anandilal Kitpitia…
– I’m sick of you and your… coming! Stop ringing! This is Jeetu from
Videocon. Is Anjali there? Anjali has drowned in the sea!
– Please give her the phone… Are you trying to bully
me? You wretched guitar! I’m not giving the phone to
Anjali! I’m not! What will you do? Sir, give me. Bull’s offspring! Whom
are you threatening? I know scum like you! Your father must’ve been
up to no good to sire you If you even utter the name
of the Tiwari family… I’m going to break the legs
of everyone in your family! He appears to be a dangerous man Looks like only a beating will…
– What beating at this age? It was different earlier. I used
to fell a couple of them in the ring I’m talking about
thugs, sir. Not you I’ve fought a lot of such criminal
cases! I know a few thugs too You’ve only got to pay them and
show them what this chap looks like Don’t hit him too much. Just
give him a push and let him go If he acts smart, I’m going
to break his legs and… No, please, no!
– One leg then? No! He won’t look appealing
without his hands and feet Just give him a light slap There he is… I’ll be
hiding behind the tree Let’s go What’s your problem? You dare toy with the
womenfolk of the Tiwari family? Beat him up! Where are you going?
Who’s going to pick him up? Hey mister… get up.
Your friends have left You can’t use this telephone.
It’s meant for the staff Everyone wants to use it Anjali, where have you been?
I want to meet you right now! No, I can’t meet you right now.
I’m out shopping with my parents I’m calling you on the sly How long are we going
to play hide and seek? You’ve called me after five days!
You know how worried I’ve been? Hadn’t you phoned today, I
was about to go to your house No, don’t do that. If
my Papa gets to know… He’s got to know already!
He sent goons to beat me up! But what’s God going to do? I’ll
have to do something on my own Won’t I call you at your house if
I want to talk something official? Which I did. But the old man
flared up and called me names There was another bastard
there who was very rude God! Jeetu, don’t call
my place ever again I’ll give you a friend’s
number. Her name is Priya The number is 6334523.
Call only in an emergency There is an emergency!
Now, this moment! I want to ask you something, Anjali.
It has to do with my life and death What?
– Do you love me, or don’t you? Say something. I’m sure you love me… but I want to hear you say it. Say yes, just once… and I’m willing to take
on the whole world for you Jeetu, how will I say it? Just once, say I love you If you say no, I
will never call again Why don’t you say something? Is the old man around?
– Yes If you agree, you don’t
need to say anything Just cut the line.
– Know the truth, Jeetu? How often will I tell
you not to use this phone? Why did you get up from
your bed? Go and lie down There’s this beautiful fairy… she has descended from the skies… she stands before me… she’s the one I have
fallen in love with I have fallen in love with her She’s the light from
the Moon and the stars… she’s the lamp in a temple One glimpse of her
has driven me crazy She’s the melody of my breath,
she means the world to me What’s my heart, I could give my
life to her, if she asked me for it There’s this beautiful fairy… she has descended from the skies… she stands before me… she’s the one I have
fallen in love with I have fallen in love with her When she looks at
me with a smile… my heart goes out to her Her charms are as
enticing as she is it’s her dreams I’m lost
in, all day and night… she’s the one I see when
I awaken every morning There’s this beautiful fairy… she has descended from the skies… she stands before me… she’s the one I have
fallen in love with I have fallen in love with her I have fallen in love with her I’m glad she’s taking a bath! Anjali! I’m here to take
you away! Come on out! What brings you here? Who are you? You’ve forgotten me so soon?
– Oh yes My CD-player, TV set, oven,
refrigerator are all working very well. Go away I request you one last time,
sir. Please don’t stop me Give my Anjali to me
with your blessings, Don’t you feel any shame at all? A boy and a girl love each other
so what’s there to be ashamed about? A girl?
– You think she’s an old hag? I get it! You’ve fallen in
love with Anjalis riches! Tell me… how much money
do you want to forget Anjali? Don’t weigh my love in the scale
of wealth, Radhesham Tiwari! Shut up, you beggar!
What have you got to lose? I’ve earned name and respect
in this country and the world You spoke sweet words
and led her astray… and she drove you crazy
with her silly antics But remember, she’ll never leave me
to go away with a pauper like you! Really? If you’re so confident,
call her here, you old fossil! And ask her in my presence.
– I’ve asked her several times… and she has answered me too!
– You’re lying to me! If she says the same thing to me… I’ll live all my life
with half a moustache! You need to have whiskers first.
Go away, before I call the police! Not even the military can separate
two lovers, do you understand? I know you’ve locked Anjali upstairs.
– How did you get to know? What else can you do, Tiwari?
Quietly hand over Anjali to me… or I’ll have to go
upstairs and break the lock! To do that, you’ll have
to step over my dead body! That’s enough, Radhesham. If I
don’t take Anjali away in 24 hours… I won’t be Jeetu from Videocon!
– Think of another name. Go on! You have 24 hours, Tiwari Stop me, if you’re
truly your mother’s son! Right now! I’m willing
to pay 10 for each of them Send seven strong guys here
right now. And listen… each one of them must wield
a gun. And every gun must work No, it’s not a bank. I have
a priceless antique item I can’t see it being
robbed in front of my eyes The hospital bill is so high I don’t know how
I’ll ever repay you. Your husband has paid the bill He borrowed the money from
me at 10 per cent interest Not every girl has
a husband like yours Anjali, the taxi’s waiting Listen! Let’s run away!
– Now? Yes. I’m ready No, not now. Maybe a few days later You’ve always been saying later You haven’t fallen in love
with your fake wife, have you? No, actually you’ve
misunderstood me That letter…
– It’s still with me If you betray me, I’ll have
you thrown out of this house… and I’ll show that letter to
everyone and give you a bad name Don’t do that. You are the one
I love, but I feel scared… if Popat gets to know, he can send
us to jail with his money power All right. Come out Come out! You will do as I say.
– What? The two of us will
elope in a few days Where to?
– There is a place… Popat can never get to!
– But… Don’t worry. Just go and
hide in some cheap hotel Where? There’s a hotel opposite the station.
Stay there and behave like a madman I’ll come there later and say
that you’ve escaped from the asylum I’ll take you to the
railway station… we’ll take a train and run away! Is that necessary?
– Yes If we leave together,
Popat will get suspicious If we leave separately, he won’t
even guess we’ve eloped together Someone’s going to help me!
– Who? The police. Sub-inspector Waghmare I know how to entice him. Okay? But make sure you carry
enough money from here Don’t worry. I’ll take so
much cash and jewellery… we’ll have a
honeymoon all our lives! Rob something once I’ll tell the Marwari and send
you away on a honeymoon forever I know you’ve hidden him somewhere! Have you got rubbish for
brains? I’ve told you… I don’t have another
son, I don’t! I don’t! So who was he?
– How am I to know? Radhesham, don’t
test Tejas patience! So you don’t believe what I’m saying?
– No, I don’t! Are you sure? 100 per cent?
– Sure, hundred per cent! Okay. So listen The one you’re
talking about is my son That he promised to marry
your daughter is also true But I’m against the marriage.
So I’ve hidden him away somewhere Where I have hidden him, I’m
not in the mood to reveal to you Do what you will! Go away! You will now see
what stuff I’m made of Not only will I find your son,
if I don’t take the two of you… beg in the local trains of Mumbai,
I won’t call myself Teja-bhai! Give me in the name of God!
– He speaks for the beggars too! Radhe! Radhe! Why did I leave my village
and come to this hell? Hey buddy, someone
fishy staying here? I’ve been sent by the Garbage King Talk to me You… Ask me what you must to.
– Who are you? Babu Bisleri. The mole Is there someone hiding here? Yes, he’s the one Who is it? You?
– Yes, me Why have you come here?
– Where have you been hiding? I went mad looking for you! You even
gave the hotelier an assumed name I went crazy banging on every door! I’m the one who has gone mad You said your employer
would go back in a week He’s not willing to budge,
so what do I do? Rot here? It’s got to be very dangerous. Had
I stayed there another minute… I’d have been crushed between
garbage and my employer Never mind. There’s no
point staying holed up here I need to decide something.
– The Garbage King has already decided The marriage is not taking
place. He’s out to kill you If the marriage does not
take place before that… He’ll beat me to pulp,
right? Never mind that Here’s what you’ll do.
I’ll give you a letter Quietly go and give it to
Madhuri. No one must get to know Write the letter by all means.
And also give me 200 rupees I’ll immediately take
the letter to Madhuri… and no one will get to know! Swine! What did you think? You’d promise marriage and
toy with my daughter’s honour? You must’ve betrayed a lot of
girls. But you can’t deceive me! Forgive me!
– Open the door… else, l’ll break it down! L’ll
break every bone in your body… string it in a garland and put it
around your arrogant father’s neck! Open the door! Sonofagun! What do you think? You’ll hide here and I
won’t be able to find you? I can look at a fly and tell
you whether it’s male or female! Open the door!
– Chhota Chetans thugs! I don’t want to marry
her. Leave me alone! I’m here for your funeral,
not your wedding procession! I don’t want to marry her!
I’ll go far away from her! Shut up! You won’t get the
girl even in your dreams! I’m going to kill you!
Come on out, you swine! Break the door Make mincemeat out of him
and lay him at my feet! Thrash him! You play a drama with me? Get up! Who’s this? You said that scoundrel
was hiding in there! That scoundrel told me. Leave this clown alone. And
find that son of a bitch. Come on Hit me! Thrash me! Don’t
let me live anymore! Just about anyone comes along
and gives me a thrashing! When is the railway strike ending? I’m glad you came soon.
Whom do you wish to see? I’ll do it for you, but the documents
of my house and 50,000 rupees… you must quietly
bring and give it to me Sure, I’ll do that.
– I haven’t seen… the party Can I see him once?
– You’ll find him at Welcome Lodge If I ask for Nandu at Welcome
Lodge, will they tell me? No, he’s going to stay
there under an assumed name I’ve asked him to pretend madness.
That’s how you will recognize him Welcome Lodge? All right, I’ll go
to Welcome Lodge and meet your punter I’ll tell him that you’ve sent me I’ll get him out of there and have
him at the train, the very next day I’ll be there! Nandu and
I will run away from there! Is there someone here
who’s off his rocker? Is there a madman here? Ask the boss.
– Don’t you act funny with me I’m warning you! I
know it for a fact… that a madman has run away from
the asylum and is hiding here! A madman? So say that clearly, sir! That madman is surely hiding here!
– Who? This one’s sure a nut.
– A policeman! Officer! Get me out of
here! I’m in a bad jam! They’re coming to take you away.
– I’ll leave on my own How can you go away just like that?
– What will you do about it? You can’t go away. Everyone
knows you’re crazy… you’re mad Officer, they’re hand in
glove. I’ll tell you about them Hands off me.
– I’ll explain They want to prove that I’m
mad, take me away from here… so Chhota Chetan can kill me!
– See? I told you he’s mad!
He talks any nonsense Get out… move it!
– He gets into fights! So he’s one of them too! Why have you shut the door? Why? Come here!
– What for? I’ve got to tell you something.
– No thanks. Let me go You needn’t worry, feller.
I’m Inspector Waghmare The other party has sent me here.
– The other party? The other party will arrive
exactly at 10 to take you away We got together and made
the plan to deliver you there Are you one with them?
– Yes God! Now I know why the police
are terrified of Chhota Chetan! Damn it! Wow! I can’t figure out how such an
atom bomb fell in love with you! Not she, I was the one who
fell Ever since I was a child Since you were a child?
– I never imagined… this would happen
to me! I’m leaving! Scream!
– I’m going! People will really think you’re mad.
– I’m not mad! Go! Get him! Hold tight! Tomorrow morning, she and
I will come to take him away His expenses… you will bear. Will I get some tips first? Sure, if he runs away,
you’ll get a tight slap What are you telling
me? Anil has gone mad? He doesn’t step out of the room. He’s the only man… who’s
living under an assumed name. It must be Anil then He wrote to me that
he’s hiding here. That girl has betrayed me, he says He misunderstands you and
says, Kill me! Kill me! Maybe he’s scared of your papa.
Right now, he’s been hidden somewhere Tomorrow morning, they are
taking him to the asylum Madhuri, why are you crying? He’s in this state
only because of me! I’ve been wanting to tell
you something for a long time Go ahead I’m not a singer, like you
think. I come from a rich family There was no dearth of riches
and comforts in my house But my parents were
against my music They wanted me to take over the
family business, and I didn’t want to I began to feel suffocated
there and I ran away from home Why’ve you telling me all that? The drama we’re both
enacting… could we really? They’re here to take him away.
Did he cause problems last night? He did, I banged the
hammer on his head and… Is he dead? – No.
Plastic cups don’t break easily I got to hammer his head
again and take him away I’ll play the music for him.
It’s days since I beat up someone I’m mad! I’m a lunatic! Not so much over-acting…
don’t go overboard! He’s begun to speak! He’s not dumb! I’ll carve you to pieces!
Either you live, or I I’ll kill you first
and die afterwards! Yes, carve me to
pieces, kill me! Hack me! Calm down, Anjali What will you get out of yelling?
It’ll only attract the neighbours If you lose your respect,
how will you live with honour? What respect is left
to be lost anyway? Look at this letter!
Written by her lover! My dear Anjali, our hearts
met and united at my shop I know, that old man is
a shackle in your feet I did what I could to
reason with that scoundrel… but he just won’t agree!
– Lies! This is a pack of lies! I’ll hack you to pieces!
He further writes… There’s just one way left. Tonight, I’ll quietly
rescue you from that hell Read it for yourself!
Why do it on the sly? Go away openly! Before that, end your
relationship with me! He got someone to write the letter! He wants to throw me out so he…
can bring that young girl home. Which young girl! No wonder he’s putting all
these false proofs together! But that’s not happening!
I will go away… I brought three cars full of gold.
– You want that back with interest? Yes!
– That’s what you want? I’m not giving it! I’m not parting with a
penny. Do what you can! Go away and file a case.
Before that, leave the world! Weep on Videocon’s shoulders!
Don’t shed tears here I know Anjali very well. She can’t
have an affair like the one you say You mean, he’s having an affair?
I know Mr. Tiwari very well He’s not that kind of a man! The less said about your
knowledge, the better! Sir, trusting womenfolk
is like committing suicide I suspect you too are having
an affair behind my back! Lawyer! Are you here to sort out my
problem or create one for yourself? No, sir. We must solve this puzzle We can decide it only after we
get to know who’s behind all this Who’s that boy? Let’s call him here Oh yes. Let’s decide
this once and for all I’ll call that boy right here.
– No, sir… I have a condition before
you call that boy here You’re a very hot-tempered
man. – Give that to me You will reason with that
boy, without getting excited… or creating any scenes. It ought to remain in the family The two of us will go inside… he mustn’t think you’re humiliating
him in front of the world Speak up, Tiwari. Here I am Did you write this letter, Romeo?
– What? Anjali, our hearts…
– Yes, I wrote it You wrote this letter despite knowing
what the consequences would be? Yes.
– Since you have so much courage… then tell me…
how much you love to Anjali. Anjali means the life to me! You want to hear that again?
– Lawyer! You?
– Papa! So you were born of
him? It makes sense then When the brand itself is faulty,
this is how the showroom will be! Boys are often naughty at this age But the womenfolk must preserve
their honour, mustn’t they? Watch your tongue, lawyer!
– I see! The bitter truth! Whatever my son’s character,
he’s surely better than you are! You don’t even know how many sons
of yours are roaming the city! What rubbish!
– Listen boy. Speak the truth Did I ever tell you that
I’m in love with you? No.
– So then? I’ve been talking about
Anjali, his daughter My daughter Anjali? Which
new daughter is that? You also have another daughter! He’s lying! Absolutely!
– O God! What am I hearing? It’s lies! Something’s happening to me… Tell me the truth. How many
wives and children do you have? My darling wife! He’s lying!
– You’re the one who’s lying I used to drop her
here every evening! Decide brother-in-law
or father-in-law. One moment… where’s
that girl right now? Papa, this old man must’ve
hidden her somewhere God! What a monster!
– He’s lying Do you have any contact number? Yes, I have her friend’s number Ask her where she is. Call her here.
– Yes, call her here! This is our Nandu! He has run away from home. The
informer will be paid 200,000 200,000! Popat! You’ve
hit the jackpot of 200,000! Let me see how you step out.
It has to do with 200,000 rupees How did you get there?
– Popatji, I’m leaving Leaving? How can you
leave just like that? Your picture has been
published in the newspapers! The one who takes you home
will get 200,000 rupees Don’t mess with my reward,
please. Stop there… stop! Remember something?
Isn’t she your daughter? Sorry, I made a mistake They met in the garden as
father and daughter. God! Take me away!
– God isn’t a weight lifter, fat lady! Shut up! My child… am I your father? You call her My child and ask
her whether you’re her father! Shut up… my child…
am I your father? Hurry up and speak. It has
to do with my married life! No What nonsense! You told me
that you’re his daughter! That he hates the idea of
you working in my store! And I even met you
at this very place! Please forgive me All these misunderstandings
are taking place because of me But please hear me out once After that whatever punishment
you give me, I will accept I came to this city
to look for a job Despite the best of my
efforts, I couldn’t find one And when I got the opportunity
to work at his showroom… I didn’t want to lose it. So
I spoke one lie after another To hide one lie, I had
to lie many more times That’s the truth After a very long time,
I’ve spoken the truth today Don’t cry, my child What has happened is in the
past. We hold nothing against you Where is your other son?
– There she goes again! You want to see? You want to? I come here for the last time! One problem ends,
another one begins! Welcome, you’re the
one we were missing. – It’s either this
way or that today! You folks don’t know what a
dirty rotten scoundrel I am! I knew that the moment I saw you.
– Silence! Where is my daughter?
– What? His daughter? He always asked where my son was! And now he asks
where his daughter is! Do you suffer from an affliction?
– When you got to know… that I’d have my daughter
married to your son… you had my daughter kidnapped!
Where is my daughter? She has married me and is
very happy to be with me Shut up! What are you going to do?
– I’ll take your life! It’s not a toy. You might
kill me! Put it away! Shut up! I could pump
your body with lead anyway! I know all of you are
conspiring against me! So everyone’s going with
me. If anyone refuses… it’ll be his last refusal! Move it! I’m going to bite
you back, you dog! Stop there!
– Get him! Get him! Get him! Out! This is no garden, it’s
my den. The den of death Where’s my daughter?
– It’s coming out of my ears! From my house to here, you
asked me a hundred times! Which language you do understand?
– Where is my daughter? Tell me, else I’ll kill you! You hit me! Garbeg. – You! Wait there… You… spiting on me. You kiss my wife! You dare kiss my Mom! Freeze! I’ve got a
pistol! Stay where you are! One, two… Catch. Your father was dead,
isn’t it? His son dies now! Hey loony! Quiet! Hands up! How will I? Tell me where my daughter is.
– She has committed suicide She has ended her
life in a dry well! You poke fun at me? The
slugs in this gun are real You want to see? You
want to? Take a look Nobody moves! Else
you’re dead-meat! Stick your hands up, or
I’ll send you to hell! Hey hero… you want me to
send you through the mobile? Stick your hands up! Go on! Listen… How much more will you make me run? Anjali, where are you? Everything’s suddenly
so quiet, isn’t it? Like the clouds
clearing, after a storm A lot of things are clear surely I admit, I loved you because I
thought you were Tiwaris daughter I have to give some girl the
charge to my life some day So I thought, why not… Jeetu says he wants to marry me Nandu says that too Nandu and I have been pretending
to be man and wife for many days So that consideration
Nandu must surely get So you’ll marry both of us?
– No Actually, during the
melee that took place… I found a way out of this dilemma.
– What? I’ve written both
names on these chits Whichever name comes
up, I’ll marry him What? Nandu, you pick a chit.
– I won’t! I always lose! No, not me! I always lose!
– We have no other way, Nandu I’m not picking lots.
– I’ve prayed to God… He’ll help me choose the right boy Jeetu, you pick a slip I knew I’d lose! Nandu in this one too?

100 thoughts on “Hungama (HD) | Hindi Movies 2016 Full Movie | Akshaye Khanna Movies | Bollywood Comedy Movies

  1. 💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💌💌💌💌💌💌💌💌💌💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

  2. Halchal, hangama, Hera fery malala malweekly, deewane huwe pagal ,jitni bar dekho maja aata h full of tenstion free nice

  3. Priyadarshan ki movies hamesha Bahot cute category me atee hai. sorry, Cutest category me atee hai, Na wo comedy hoti hai, Na emotional drama, Na Action, Na Mythological, Just Cute.

  4. Rajpal yadav is always epice…
    Hs hs kr pagal ho gya yaarr

  5. Aisi cute films ab kyu nahi banti .itni lambi film par 1 sec ke liye bhi bore nahi ki .can watch it 10000000000000000 times

  6. One of best comedy movie ever made in India ,watched it over 100times, still loves it and that last scene akshay khanna smile😊😊😊😊😊

  7. Naam tilsi das khan mata ka naam mumtaz devi what a line ha ha ha ha ha ha ha naam hai ki india pakistan ka border ha ha ha ha like karo iss line par bhai log 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤗🤗🤗🤗

  8. बहुत ही अच्छा है राम राम जी सभी भाई-बहन को जय हिंद जय भारत

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