Q is today’s big loser. And what a monumental day
it is. You’re going to go into
this building right now, buddy, and attempt to shatter
a world record. -Time is of the essence.
-Yeah. Here you go.
Just go right now. Don’t ask questions! Who here likes turtles? Raise
your hand if you like turtles. -Yeah, yeah.
-So here’s two of our producers. So you guys all see
these eggs today? -Yes.
-Yes. There’s 144 turtle eggs that are supposed
to hatch today. Sal: So they’re being told
that Q is a scientist who’s going to come out
and help little baby turtles out of all these eggs. Murr: What we’re telling Q is that he’s here
to smash these eggs over his head
as fast as possible. -Yeah.
-You see the problem. Yeah. Hey, bud. Do you have any semblance of what you’re thinking
about today? I have no — I have zero clue
as to what this is. It’s fun, buddy. I’m sure — for you. Are you guys ready
to meet the doctor? All: Yes! Q, you’re going to go out there,
say, “You guys ready? Here we go”, and attempt
to break the most eggs over your head
in one minute. [ Laughter ] And Q, remember.
You’re being timed. Speed is of the essence. -How’s it going?
-Here we go. -You excited?
-Three, two, one… Go! [ Children gasp ] [ Child screams ] Go! Go! Oh, my God. -No! [ Laughter ] Oh, no. Oh, no! Look at the girl. Obviously, these are
store-bought eggs. [ Children shouting ] Almost there!
Almost there! Go, go, go! This is going as planned. 4, 3, 2, 1! -Okay, that’s it.
-Yay! Huh? How did I do? -Okay, Q.
-Yeah? Now turn around
and give this presentation. Joe: Let’s get started
with this presentation. Alright, “I’m so happy everyone
is here to watch these…” Alright. “I’m so happy everyone
is here to watch these…” [ Laughter ] Oh, my God! Look at his face. You have egg on your face. [ Laughter ] Where are the turtles? [ Laughter ] [ Child crying ] [Bleep] you guys.
[Bleep] you guys. We just cost some
therapy bills, boys. No, we’re gonna tell
the kids eventually. -Turtles! Turtles!
-Alright! [ Children chanting “Turtles!” ] Turtles! Turtles! Oh, God. No amount of chanting
will bring these turtles back to life. Turtles. “Turtles hatched
in captivity are 100% safe
from natural predators.” [ Laughter ] “And each turtle lays
up to 1,000 eggs. So, if we have
144 turtles here…” “We can have 144,000 turtles
in the future.” [ Children screaming ] It’s mayhem. Oh, no, Q. “This is my turtle, Myrtle”. That’s Myrtle. “Let’s name these baby turtles”. This is dark, man. This is really dark. “Go for it, kids!
Just grab one!” [ Laughter ] No, here’s one.
Here you go. Joe: Be careful.
Don’t break it. Actually, I don’t
trust you with it. Let me hold it. Alright, actually,
let me hold it. Q, drop that egg. These are very delicate. [ Laughter ] We said drop it,
not throw it to the ground. [ Children chanting
indistinctly ] [ Laughter ] Well, we cracked
that punishment. [ Chuckles ] [ Chuckles ] Boy: Boo! [ Laughter ]