Laughter is the Best Medicine

“Indian Doctors” | Russell Peters – Almost Famous

I would never go to an Indian guy that became a doctor Especially one that was born and raised in this part of the world fuck that Cause if we were born and raised here you had real dreams, and it was never to become a doctor Let’s be honest. I would go to an Indian woman I became a doctor cause when an Indian woman becomes a doctor that means she really wanted to be a doctor Cause even her parents like sweetie. You don’t have to become a doctor, You can just marry a doctor She’s like fuck you. I wanna be a doctor. I need that kind of determination from my doctor You know well you had dreams in your 14 years old right Sandeep, but it wasn’t to be a doctor That’s not what a fourteen-year-old dreams about it 14 year old has dreams that are ridiculous that that your dream at 14 should never be Logical it should just be the dumbest shit you’re doing at 14. I’ll tell you what my dream was when I was 14 It wasn’t to be a comedian. I didn’t even know this job existed My dream it’ll make you feel better about whatever your dream was My dream at fourteen here’s I thought I was going to do with the rest of my life. I thought I Wanted to be a dancer Alright first of all fuck you all right Second of all I’m not a stripper. I would I was a breakdancer like ,yo I’m going to do this shit forever Not a realistic goal, though What was your dream when you’re a fourteen-year-old boy growing up on the mean streets of Mississauga? Sandeep now be honest don’t make no bullshit up huh? A musician did you play an instruments? oh- well good. That’s a good start. I always I don’t have Indian guys You know yell out shit that they never did I wanted to be in the NBA Did you play basketball ? not once, just love Giant Black men y’know just- What instrument did you play? Guitar, you good? You still throw down on it? Yeah, so you wanted to be a musician-I know what happened tell me if I’m right. You’re about 17-18 years old you’re sitting in your room playing with your “guitar” And your mom walked and you were thinking I’m going to be a musician your mom walked in and then “san doo” Cause that’s all you need to do for an Indian nickname All you need to add 2 o’s to whatever you want the nickname to be Some do like look what Edward and Edwoo. Well that could be your name Ed Wu. Sorry that um that didn’t work as He might very well be an Ed Wu, yeah your mom Morgan Son do We’re going to college, why don’t you become a doctor? You’re like what’s wrong with your face? If you become a doctor you can fix it! So you put your guitar down and picked up, Stethoscope and it was all over after that that’s why I could never go to you I don’t want my doctor to have had other dreams about being something else my doctor in America is Going to be a black guy From the hood who grew up with every disadvantage real hood like in the hood hood like where the-where people were like you could Yo cuz! Let’s go kill some motherfuckers today! I want my doctor to be the guy that said “No Man!” I’m gonna be a doctor! And everybody in the hood was like “Ain’t nobody gonna fuck with the Pharaoh” He’s gonna be a doctor and shit That time I know I got the right doctor cause he’ll say and shit at the end of sentences He’ll look pissed off when I walk into the doctors office. That’s the doctor I want. Alright Mr. Peters, Seems your nasal passage’s inflamed and shit You fill out this little bitch-ass prescription Holla at me tomorrow, Motherfucker That’s the right doctor for me-I don’t want my doctor to be some bratty Indian kid who grew up in Mississauga Halfway through an operation. Just goes fuck this shit. I wanna play guitar and then goes [FUNNY NOISES]

100 thoughts on ““Indian Doctors” | Russell Peters – Almost Famous

  1. Is my parents chill if they support my dreams? My dream is to be a Korean singer (Im half asian and american btw) and they even let me go to Korea to improve my skills…damnnnnn

  2. I wanted to be a fashion designer
    I forgot I'm an Indian
    I became a doctor
    Also, I'm a girl.
    Russell's never gonna be my patient now…

  3. If you look at many famous Indians in India, for example, lots of Bollywood celebrities, artists, singers, musicians, etc..,
    a lot of them hold an Engineering degree.
    Because if you're from India, before you do anything else in life, you must become an Engineer, and then decide what the fuck you actually want to do in life.

  4. Enjoyed the video. 👍
    I would like to share something…
    The reality is that only 10k out of 1.5M aspirants get a seat in Govt. Medical College in India.
    Just imagine what level one should achieve so as to outsmart the other hard-working students.
    And even after getting into a college, you have to handle all the possible diseases and accidents on this planet.
    I myself spent countless nights studying before I made it. Higher competition demands higher standards.
    Believe me it's not a joke. I respect Indian doctors (but only those who did it from a Govt. College, otherwise anyone could become a doctor by paying USD 150k donation)

  5. Anyone ever have that moment with your parents that, you are sitting in your room and they call so u say "what" no reply, then u say "what" again still no reply but then ur parents are screaming at u for not listening EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE NOT LISTENING TO YOU. 😶😐🙃

  6. Russell Peters-Russians|Расселл Питерс – Русские. Озвучка – Gra_Vik

  7. This is the problem and sick mindness of Indian people.
    We are even ready to mock ourselves and our people just for some money.
    The day Indians dont change this mentality and have some self respect, they would always be treated down.

  8. wanted to be a soccer player, was really good at it…..
    forced/ended up being a dental surgeon…. in Mississauga….. at age 26….. fuck!

  9. Atleast youth over here in India aren't getting pregnant at 11-12 or addicted to hard drugs with no goals in life what so ever. What you make fun of here, is exactly what west wants on their life.

  10. I just watched a comic tonight who stole this joke. I knew something was fishy when I heard it. Helen Hong. Be on the lookout

  11. Haha so funny….u think so ?
    DICKHEAD…Watch Kenny Sebastian stand up comedy videos….will make u realise how much u suck at ur job !!!!!

  12. This fucking shit is from INDIAN origin I think.he always bully/mock INDIA and it's culture and try to be a real native of fucking face dick.your face looks like a pig.

  13. Difference between this bugger and Trevor Noah – Trevor Noah actually does hilarious jokes without offending people. And what does he do?

  14. looking at this thread a lot of Indians are sensitive and not really into comedy. you could have used this thread to show good examples of Indians
    to the rest of the world but instead you act like the stereotypes we see on the news.

  15. What’s funny is the when is was 14 I wanted to be a doctor. Now I’m a painter and training to be an MMA fighter.

  16. My doctor in Brampton is Indian born. I have a really hard time understanding him, he puts R's in words that do not or never did require them.He once gave me a prescription for an antibiotic for high blood pressure. If you ever wonder why hospitals in the GTA are full of elderly Indian people, it's because they see Indian doctors that wanted to be musicians…..

  17. It's funny how he has only jokes on Indians. Why not china? Um, north Korea? Ummm Russia?
    Holf on! Ahh! I see why. 😂

  18. What type comedy is that degrading cultures, professions ,religions
    these types of comedians have serious mental problems they need to go mental hospitals.

  19. U know russel u talk quite shit about indians but let me tell u ur face is even bad in co.parision to shit. So stop nonsense about india cuz people shit like u tarnish indias reputation. So just shut fuck up now

  20. In my country if you grew up in where I was from the rural areas or small towns your choices were:

    1.) Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer
    2.) Be a grab driver, construction worker or factory worker.
    3.) Sell counterfeit products in the train stations.
    4.) Do insurance scamming by jumping in front of moving cars or perhaps even faking people you have no legs or arms and ask people to give you money.
    5.) Opening a “hot dog” restaurant or “exotic food” restaurant.
    6.) Marry a rich husband (for women only).

  21. Well , Indians are probably why America runs be it Google or a restaurant . Also our doctors are one of the best in the world . So fuck you 🖕

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