Laughter is the Best Medicine

“Indians are Cheap” | Russell Peters – Red, White, and Brown

>>Russell Peters: Look at all these Indian faces, Jesus Christ! [Laughter] Look at you, brown bastards, goddamn! [Laughter] Indians just look upset, that they had to spend money, to be here tonight, don’t cha? [Laughter and Clapping] Just the look, on their face, just– [Laughter] [indian accent] “This is bullshit!” [Laughter] “I don’t know, why I’m spending money, to see someone, that looks just like me!” [Laughter and Clapping] [Whistle] [Laughter continues] “I can stay home, and look in the mirror.” [Laughter] “For free!” [Laughter] We are an endless supply, of “cheap” jokes! [Laughter] You know what the best thing about it is? Indian people, were proud of our cheapness! You’re never gonna insult us, by calling us cheap, that’s the best part, you know? [Applause] You can walk up to an Indian, “You guys are cheap!” [Indian accent] “Thank you for noticing, thank you.” Laughter and Applause] “Thank you, very much, thank you.” [Laughter and Clapping] [Normal voice] “That guy just called you cheap!” [Indian accent] “No, no, no…” “He pronounced it ‘cheap,’ but what he was saying, was, ‘smart.” [Laughter] “Very ‘smart,’ he was saying.” [Laughter] We’re cheap. We’re– you know what, here’s the thing– It’s not like I’m up here going, “YOU Indian people are cheap, and I’m the one that’s not.” No, no, no, no, no. [Laughter] [Indian accent] No, NO, no, no, no, no. [Laughter] [Normal voice] I’m just as fuckin cheap, as you! [Laughter] The difference is, now, I have money! [Laughter] I’m just cheap, in better stores! [Laughter] I’ll be looking, at like, an Armani shirt– I hate when this happens. I’m looking at a shirt, from like, a high-end designer, and I flip the tag over, and I see, “Made in India.” I’m stuck with a real dilemma, I’m like, “Shit!” [Laughter] “Do I buy this?” [Laughter] “Or do I call my uncle?” [Laughter and Applause] “I wonder if he knows, where this factory is…” [Laughter] We are cheap. Everybody’s cheap, aren’t they? Never call white people cheap. White people get really upset, when you call them cheap. You ever called white person cheap? They get very angry. ‘Cause white people, actually, are probably, the only people that aren’t cheap. You ever call a white guy cheap? “You’re cheap.” [Douchey voice] “Fuck you, I’m cheap!” “I’ll buy you a beer. You want a beer?” [Laughter] That’s how white guys get around, being cheap! [Douchey voice] “You want a beer? You want a beer? You want a beer? You want a beer? You want a beer? Huh? You want a beer?” “Fuck you, I’m not cheap, I bought everybody beer!” [Laughter] Everybody’s cheap – it’s all about levels, you know? Black people are cheap as shit, and I’ll tell you why, because I know– I grew up around enough black people, to know exactly how cheap you are. I remember going, to my best friend Marlon’s house, when I was a kid. [Russell chuckles] I’d go there, and be like, “Hey Marlon, can I have some cereal?” [Cool guy voice] “Yeah, go ahead, help yourthelf.” [Laughter] Heres the thing, Marlon, and I, have been friends for 31 years. Best friends, for 31 years and I didn’t realize he had a lisp– [Laughter] until I did an impression of him. [Laughter] Like, “Can I get some cereal?” [Marlon’s voice] “Yeah, go ahead, help yourthelf.” [Laughter] I was like, “Son of a bitch, he has a lisp!” [Laughter] So, I go pour some cereal, I got to get the milk– I’m like, “Yo! You only got this much milk left!” [Marlon’s voice] “Ah, shit.” [Laughter] “Ight, gimme the jug, I’ll make some more.” [Audience groaning, in disgust, laughing, and clapping] [Normal voice] “What do you mean you’ll, ‘make some more?” [Laughter] He takes the jug of milk, shoves it under the sink, and starts filling it with water! I’m like, “Yo, this barely looks like milk!” [Marlon’s voice] “It’s ‘thkim’ milk.” [Laughter and Applause] ♪ ♪

100 thoughts on ““Indians are Cheap” | Russell Peters – Red, White, and Brown

  1. 0:32 look at that indian guy rubbing his wet fingers to sanitarise for free. He is a living example in just 3 sec.

  2. He's just making jokes on India and insulting them in front of foreigners! that's the reason why other people still hate Indians

  3. Indian people use hindi language for their mother tongue …man can you even spoke one word, can you even try it…but Indian people can speak what you called your mother tongue(english) and they can understand as well…do you even understand hindi…Man English people are useless they can only spoke one language…so you people should look up other countries…well you bullied about their accent man,if they were born and raised in America they will surely spoke like you….can you even speak my language cause you only learn one language…we can speak our language uff one extra english of course…๐Ÿ–•

  4. Mother f*** you are talking about growth of India which is stolen money from this country and well infrastructure done from British

  5. You are right.few jealous indians bastards dont accept the fact but are expert in arguing and imagining that they themselves are great esp LOOSERS esp those who misuse technology

  6. Hey there a** I dare u to do this same in Indian stage with same words …I don't think u will be going back to ur nation in single peice….as u landed….

  7. You forgot that India is the 2nd largest market for international mobile companies + we pay there salary too, You dumbass MF!

  8. Fun fact, we are so cheap that ISRO gets through successfully without getting funds from other country with India employee and also parts of rocket was earlier carried by bicycle(that's passion) , i wonder what will happen to NASA if it wasn't for we indians ๐Ÿค” My cheap Indian heart is living proudly. ๐Ÿ˜‚

  9. Russell, you could do another standup on how butthurt Indians are, just look at the comments section right now๐Ÿ˜‚ Only some Indians can take a simple joke, mujhe fark Nahi parta๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜Ž

  10. I spend money very sensibly, because it's hard earned , no shame in admitting that๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚. Call me kanjus left , right and centre but I am content. No point in blind spendthrifting ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜.

  11. Anyone who has to bootstrap themselves is cheap. Its a requirement! Indians just has excellent ettiquete when they do it lol

  12. There is a big difference between cheap and frugality, this person will never understand it……financially illiterate NRI…..

  13. Not just because of India, but this dude is not at all funny. Idk y . There is much better talent in India standup comedy !

  14. Everybody can be cheap. But (and I am so serious when I say this) Indian people are by far, the cheapest people I have ever encountered in my life!

  15. Freddy mercury Queen FredsGotWingsG fredy mercury Queen Gwyeen queen of hearts was in KC and the sunshine band ..he wrote the Rocky horror picture show ..ELO dire straits Super tramp all the good songs . Freddy was the second Indian… meryvinchian …I was is the first…we don't eat babies ..or wicked shit…..they hate us …bc they eat babies …my babies ..??? I meet them in the moon…

    Operation early cooker stove pipe 96 avercardo .. to rob my ..powers. …no more..

  16. You should do a bit about how Indian people have no regard for a line…they just run to the front of a line at the bus stop with smiles on their faces hoping people will say let the poor,ignorant immigrants go ahead,,, or how they never say thank you when you hold a door open for them…or even better… how they pick their noses on busses and touch everything on the bus with their snotty hands before they get off….or… even funnier how many of them have to yell at each other in public areas because they have turbans wrapped over their ears. The jokes are endless….you're welcome…

  17. Indians are too sensitive which doesn't seem to understand joke which proves to be even more cheap. If you are cheap try to take that as compliment and work on it

  18. You insult everyone for no reason that's why you would never happy in your life I heard your life story that's why I said this

  19. American (oohh sorry sorry Umm….MERICAN) are so failed at studies that they started believing in the flat earth theory and now have a whole f**king community based on that and this guy is just one of them
    We have the best art, the best music, the best scientists (oh sorry again… The most efficient scientists) who can make stuff with less budget than the budget of avengers endgame
    Wow just wow guys congratulations guys with your knowledge
    you guys don't even know the potential of a country and start to talk shit about it because of some discrimination within the country based on caste creed race religion which will eventually fade away in some years

    Thank you for being so stupid
    A humble Indian

  20. People getting offended when he even calls himself a cheap person and some dumbass replyin that comment with some racist illogical stuff which doesn't even make sense
    True Comedy in comment section

  21. You are the cheapest man i ever seen..making cheap money by hurting others..having a microphone in your hand is not a big thing to mock others….hate you

  22. Dark humour is like a transparent water…. Not everyone gets it… Being qn Indian it's shame that lots of Indian can't even take a joke but can bash other countries and laugh

  23. @Russell Peters U gotta keep Ur fat a** mouth shut buddy…. Ur a** should be jealous of your mouth coz there's a lot of shit coming out of ya mouth…..

  24. As an Asian I TOTALLY AGREE WITH Russell Peters, when it comes to being CHEAP. I BELIEVE CHINESE comes first, followed by INDIANS, THEN "JEWS". And the last Joke about "SKIM MILK" was detrimental hilarious…..

  25. I don't why this son of a bitch( Russell peters), can't make a stand up comedy without using " India". In order to feed himself and his family, he needs to make fun of India and Indians. Poor asshole he wouldn't make money without using India. Then he would be cheap. Fuck u Russell.

  26. I drive uber eat and Doordash. I never accept the indian restaurant order because indian customer never tip and mostly yelling at me when i canโ€™t find them adress.

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