Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Kevin Hart – Laugh At My Pain – Almost Lost You Today


MY DAD ALMOST KILLED
ME ONE TIME. WHEN I WAS YOUNGER,
I COULDN’T SWIM. I DIDN’T KNOW HOW. MY DAD DIDN’T BELIEVE ME. THIS NIGGA ARGUED ME DOWN. WE HAD A POOL. I’M SITTING ON THE SIDE
OF THE POOL. I GOT MY FEET IN THE WATER. “MM-MM-MM, MM-MM-MM.” I’M PLAYING, HAVING A GOOD TIME. MY DAD SAID, “BOY, YOU BETTER
STOP PLAYING. GET IN THAT WATER AND SWIM.” I SAID, “DAD, I CAN’T. I DON’T KNOW HOW TO SWIM.” HE SAID, “YOU KNOW HOW
TO FUCKIN’ SWIM. GET IN THAT GODDAMN WATER
AND SWIM.” I SAID, “NO, DAD, I’M SERIOUS. NOBODY EVER TAUGHT ME
HOW TO SWIM.” MY DAD PICKED ME UP,
GRABBED ME, THREW ME IN SEVEN FEET. AS SOON AS I HIT THE WATER,
I STARTED TO DIE IMMEDIATELY. “HOO! HOOO! WHOOOO!”
THIS IS WHY MY DAD’S AN ASSHOLE. THIS IS WHAT MY DAD SAID. “HEY! YOU BETTER NOT FUCKIN’ DROWN.” I SAID, “WHAT? I DON’T KNOW HOW TO STOP IT. I DON’T”–
WHEN I TELL YOU THAT WAS THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE RIDE HOME
I’VE EVER HAD WITH MY DAD IN MY LIFE, KEEP IN MIND,
I ALMOST DIED. WHENEVER YOU COME CLOSE
TO DEATH, YOU BECOME TRAUMATIZED. HARD TO GET THAT SHIT
OUT YOUR HEAD. I KEPT HAVING FLASHBACKS. WE IN THE CAR. WE DRIVING HOME. I’M LOOKING OUT
THE PASSENGER WINDOW. I KEPT REPLAYING THAT SHIT
OVER AND OVER AGAIN. I WAS LIKE, “NO… NOO! NO, DON’T LET ME GO, DAD. DON’T LET ME GO.” EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE,
I WOULD LOOK AT HIM. “WHY DON’T YOU BELIEVE ME? I TOLD YOU I COULDN’T–
I DON’T KNOW WHY.” DON’T MAKE ME LAUGH RIGHT NOW. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT MY DAD
SAID TO ME. THIS IS HOW MY DAD TRIED TO MAKE
ME FEEL BETTER. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HE SAID. LOOK. DON’T MAKE ME LAUGH. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HE SAID. HE WAS DRIVING, RIGHT? HE SAID… HE SAID… [laughter]
“I ALMOST LOST YOU TODAY, DIDN’T I?”
WHAT? THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN, MAN?

100 thoughts on “Kevin Hart – Laugh At My Pain – Almost Lost You Today

  1. "Nooo, nooo! Don't let me go dad, don't let me go! I don't know why you won't believe meee!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA , fucking repeated that part like 20x

  2. That's how I learned too. My brother threw me in 5 ft. Just like Kevin said, I started to die immediately!

    LMFAOOOO! Kevin is a straight FOOL!

  3. I went to the Let Me Explain show in OKC this week and it was a horrible experience for me as a black women. The whole time he and the other comedians demean black women. One comedian actually says that” White women are better then Black women”, then you have to hear the audience clap and shout to that statement. Then when Kevin Hart performed and laughs about how he cheated on his wife with “two white girls”. After the show instead of feeling happy and relaxed, I was angry and hurt.

  4. PLEASE Gurl don get me confused wid demeaning ma own kind but as soon as i saw black woman i thought it was KFC this week

  5. Dont put the fucking punchline in the title of the video.

    Seriously comedy central. You should fucking know better

  6. it's funny, but the sudden cut of the sound when he swears is too annoying. would be better with regular censoring. to difficult to enjoy when the sound just stops for a second or something

  7. He's okay but sometimes he can repeat his jokes and it can get kinda corny. 7/10 in my scale.
    Earthquake, Dave Chappelle + Bill Burr to me are the worlds funniest comics.

  8. This other lill nigga fuck wit me I'm going off Elliot he rude disrespectful talk like that shit u touching is yours bitch nigga u know what CPS is don't make me half to show u how that feels u judgmentañ bitch fucked around and found out I ai t no fool

  9. The funniest thing about that last joke is Kevin repeatedly telling the audience not to make him laugh, and that's not even an insult to the joke. That part just makes me smile.

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