Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Key & Peele – School Bully


[bell rings] [indistinct chatter] – [laughs]
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? WHY YOU READIN’, BITCH? – BECAUSE I LIKE TO READ,
AND THIS IS A REALLY GOOD BOOK. – YOU’RE A REALLY GOOD BITCH,
BITCH. – WHY YOU GOTTA
BOTHER ME, MAN? – BECAUSE.
[dramatic piano music] I’M NOT DOING
VERY WELL IN SCHOOL. I’M READING
AT A THIRD-GRADE LEVEL. I REALLY DON’T WANT
TO GET LEFT BACK, SO WHEN I SEE SOMEBODY
READING FOR FUN, IT MAKES ME FEEL
THAT MUCH MORE STUPID! AND THEN I GET MAD!
[music stops] – UM, I DIDN’T
KNOW THAT. I– THANKS SO MUCH
FOR OPENING UP TO ME– – SHUT UP, QUEER! – I DON’T UNDERSTAND. WHY–I MEAN,
WHY YOU GOTTA GO THERE? [piano music] – I’VE BEEN HAVING
SEXUAL FANTASIES ABOUT SOME OF
THE OTHER GUYS AT SCHOOL. – WHAT?
– GIMME THAT! I’M AFRAID OF THESE FEELINGS
AND WHAT THEY MIGHT MEAN. IT’S LIKE, BECAUSE
I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH, I GOTTA
POINT THAT HATE OUTWARD TOWARDS YOU!
[snickers] [music stops] – YOU UNDERSTAND THIS
ON SUCH A DEEP LEVEL THAT– – I DON’T UNDERSTAND [bleep]!
– WHOA! – NOW I’M GONNA
PUNISH YOU PHYSICALLY FOR ACKNOWLEDGING
MY EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS! – WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, I WAS GONNA SAY IF YOU
UNDERSTAND YOURSELF SO WELL, THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD
TRY WORKING ON CHANGING IT. – OF COURSE
I WANT TO CHANGE IT! BUT IT’S THE ONLY
DEFENSE MECHANISM I HAVE AGAINST DEEPER, MORE TERRIFYING
PROBLEMS BURIED INSIDE OF ME! [brakes squeak] YOU’RE LUCKY MY DAD’S HERE.
[piano music] – [banging]
GET IN THE DAMN TRUCK, SON. I NEED TO TAKE YOU HOME AND BEAT
ON YOU ‘CAUSE I HATE MYSELF. AND YOU LOOK LIKE
YOUR MOTHER WHO LEFT ME. THEN I’M GONNA BLOCK OUT
THE GUILT I FEEL OVER MISTREATING YOU
WITH A RIVER OF VODKA. – I’M GONNA INTERNALIZE THAT AND UNKNOWINGLY TRANSFER IT
ONTO YOU TOMORROW. ♪ COMING RELUCTANTLY.

100 thoughts on “Key & Peele – School Bully

  1. 😢 I don't like being dumb, I don't like being 5 yrs older then all my classmates. When I beat kids up I'm really just beating my self up because I hate myself. Tommorow I'm gonna kick some kid in his stomach until I hear something crack because it's all I have, he will one day have a good job and family and I'll have nothing. I might as well shoot them all 😡 I have nothing to lose.

  2. "Get in the damn truck, son. I need to take you home and beat on you cause I hate myself. And you look like your mother who left me. Then I'mma block out the guilt I feel from mistreating you with a river of vodka." 😂😂😂😂

  3. Am I the only one who has almost NEVER laughed one bit at a K and P skit, but enjoy almost all of them? I don't even see them as humor, they're much more….I dunno.

    Like they call themselves humor to get public sight, but they're ALWAYS deeper than they appear, even the ones that stay strictly WITH the funny.

    Regardless I don't consider them comedians. These guys are…*shrug* Digital Poets on the human condition.

  4. In these circumstances wherein I am unable to express my pent-up emoticons I do really need that interpreter of Obama.

  5. I still dont understand that bully shit. How someone could just sit there and take it. I did horrible things to the two clowns who thought they were going to bully me. I'm grown up now but I still see those turds from time to time. And I have to resist the urge to walk up and slap the skin off em. Clowns was shook when after one summer I outgrew their asses. And I never minded getting kicked out of school for dog walking them bitches, and didn't mind being punished by my parents for getting kicked out school. It was worth it every time. The only reason I eventually backed off is when their parents threatened to sue. I miss playing with my chew toys.

  6. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂🤣🤣🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣😂😂😂😂

  7. I think this funny😂, even though its true. Thats why when im at school and someone says something negative to me, I just tell them its going to be alright 🙂

  8. Coming reluctantly

    This is what I say when my dad calls me downstairs to pull the 8 inch butt plug out my asshole because it’s ‘not healthy’.

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