Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

life lesson & laughing/cringing at my old self ๐Ÿ˜…


Hey guys! I just wanted to pop in and share a little reminder, a little lesson that no matter where you are
in your journey, it gets better. Specifically, you get better. So I just had an audition –
a Skype audition, since I’m at home – for this TV show, concept-thing
that I don’t know much about. Who knows if I’m gonna get it. That’s just not in my control. But basically, the casting director asked
me to compile clips from my history, sharing my journey and also my examples of my media experience: hosting, acting, all of that. And so I just spent the past hour looking through all my old video clips, trying to find whatever I can find. And I watched all these old videos of me. Like, I got to speak on Chinese TV and I was listening – I was like, “Oh my god, my Chinese was so bad.” My Chinese is still not that great now, but
it is a little better now. And my speaking was so bad. Hosting, I was camera-shy. I couldn’t make eye contact with the camera. – Tell me about that mixtape that you recently released. And happy belated birthday! – Thank you! So the mixtape is called Honestly: The Birthday Mixtape, and I released it a couple weeks ago on my
birthday, October 21. And the idea of the mixtape, I got it –
I had this idea early on in the spring, early summer. I wrote this poem called Honestly. And it’s just funny because it just shows
that I really have improved and I’ve grown since doing this for so many years. I don’t know if you guys realize, but when I started Lavendaire – which was four years ago – even if you watch my first Lavendaire video,
it was not that good. But you may not know that I’ve had years of
experience leading up to that first video. I started making YouTube videos in 2007, singing. I was performing, doing that kind of stuff. And I started hosting, looking-to-the-camera
type of videos in 2012, I would say. It’s really motivating. It’s funny and motivating to look back at
these old videos of me trying to make it work. I think back then, I didn’t have the skills. I had the interest and so I just went out there and did it. I didn’t second guess myself even though I
know I wasn’t qualified. I just raised my hand like, “I’ll do it! Let me do it. Let me make this video, let me interview this
person, let me shoot this for you.” I just volunteered myself and I just did it. And this is the kind of thing that you just
do by learning and practicing, and you get better through that action over time. So I just want to remind you guys that everybody’s
journey in the beginning looks like shit. It just looks bad, you look stupid. But hopefully if you keep at it, then you’ll get better and you’ll be able to look back and laugh at yourself, the way that I kind of am for me. But I also feel like for other areas,
I look back and I’m like, “Whoa, that was really good.
I’m proud of myself for doing that.” So yeah, I guess just looking down memory
lane today, feeling proud of myself. I realize that I’ve actually been doing for
a few years now. I think back then, when I just graduated college and I was going to these auditions and these
hosting roles, I didn’t have much of a reel. I just started one or two years – you don’t have that much work, that many video clips to show. Fast forward to now, I’m like 6 or 7 years
doing this and I have Lavendaire, I’ve done speaking engagements at Stanford,
LinkedIn, I spoke at TEDx. It sounds cool to say that and some of the
things I forgot to mention in my audition. I was like, “Dang it, I should’ve mentioned this and that.” But anyway, I didn’t realize until looking at it, how many things that I’ve experienced and gone through. And it’s really cool to say, “Hey look, I
have this body of work now.” And I know that has you get older, there’s going to be even more things you can add to your body of work. So it just gets better and better. Your resume, your portfolio just gets better and better. There’s this kind of struggle that, in media, they want people to be young, they want fresh faces. And yet, when I was young, I was like 21-22
really trying but not really getting anywhere. Now that I’m older – I’m 27 – I feel like, hopefully I still look young enough to do things like this. But I have, at least, the experience and the body of work. And I didn’t wait for someone else to cast me. I didn’t wait for these other external factors. What I did was I just created the YouTube
channels, made my videos. Through doing this very often, I’m not afraid
of the camera anymore. I’m very comfortable talking
to the camera in front of people. That took practice. That took years, 10 or more years, my whole
life of doing this. The first time I ever got up on stage, the
first time I gave a presentation, the first time I made a video, I was not able to do this. I was not able to do it. And it’s just cool to look back, is what I’m saying. And I just wanted to remind you that, no matter
what you’re trying to do, it gets better. You get better as long as you keep putting in the action. Just keep trying, that’s it. I think that’s all I want to say in this little vlog today. Hope you enjoyed it, and I’ll see you guys
in the next one. Bye!

100 thoughts on “life lesson & laughing/cringing at my old self ๐Ÿ˜…

  1. I need to watch this! My last year of college starts next week, and for a few days now, I was thinking about school feeling unsure about what will I do career wise after I graduate. (I got to college for an art program). After watching this video, I learn to not give up, volunteer for jobs so I can gain experience (just do it!!), and stay optimistic!
    Thank you for being an inspiration Aileen. I love this video so much. <3

  2. I feel like YouTubers usually just laugh and cringe when they make this type of video (looking back etc). But you managed to give such a valuable lesson with this!

  3. Hey Aileen, your timing couldn't have been more perfect. I am in my first year of MBBS and college started a month ago. I have been struggling with staying away from home and fitting in this cycle of sleeplessness. I think I'm taking too much pressure and freaking myself out. But I don't know otherwise.

  4. I do YouTube for 9 years now and I know exactly what you mean ๐Ÿ˜…I am proud of my journey and who I am today! ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿผ

  5. Thank you so much for the inspiration. It does get better with time.
    We just need to take a step back once in awhile to observe and appreciate our efforts.

  6. Lavinder hi ,m at the point of my life where m lost m want to quit the life but even scared of dieing can u please suggest me something ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž

  7. I need friends like you in real life ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ

  8. I can't stop procrastinating pls help me i tried to watch that vid i procrastinated while watching it the time then i watched the whole vid. I need help

  9. Hi, Aileen! I actually just listened to your mixtape that you mentioned in one of your old clips and oh my gosh it is so beautiful!! You need to keep at it! I know it's tough but you're really talented and I love your voice. I hope to hear more of your music in the near future! Lots of love, Hannah! (P.S. You inspired me to write my own songs. I might publish them on YouTube eventually but I still have to build that confidence. XOXO)

  10. Hi Aileen we really enjoyed your video you have done a lot of different things and you're right we grow as we go.

  11. I love you โค๏ธ you make want to be the best version of myself โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ

  12. thanks so much Aileen, this was so heartwarming ๐Ÿ™‚ I also love that even tho you can giggle at your youger self's skill level, you also have deep respect for her boldness. i hope i can make my future self proud! ๐Ÿ˜„

  13. Love Aileen for being that inspirational n motivating … im 34 n decided to learn gem cutting … i was shy to go to that class thinking that i have grown old but every time i watch ur videos i get so motivated to go n follow what u want n dream for … lots of love

  14. very very inspiring. iยดm just going through that first phase of starting to make videos and itยดs actually very simple and easy as long as you donยดt think about the fact that youยดre not the only person on this planet and people are actually gonna see what youยดre doing. veryyyy scary.

  15. I have a random question to ask. I'm curious, what did you major in college? (I'm also curious about others reading this message.) And could you tell me why? Thank you to anyone who responds.

  16. Thanks Lavendaire, you are so sweet! I feel really motivated and assured that my life path is going to be a good one ๐Ÿ™‚

  17. Thank you Aileen.
    I was glad that I heard "It gets better" this time now from you.
    Unfortunately I couldn't get good result about my work yesterday. I really felt down, but thanks for you, I will keep trying. I will get better!

  18. Iโ€™m trying to learn to put myself out there more even if I donโ€™t think Iโ€™m โ€œgood enoughโ€ to do it. Itโ€™s been an enlightening experience

  19. I just not get it why and how I can relate to every single video of yours even with your whole life (not the acting part but pretty much every mental journey ) โคโคโค s

  20. Strength is a blessing when you hear it from a woman who has been through tough times. I have learned to hold on to principles, patterns and strategies that life through me into. How I have changed, I forget those things which are behind and press towards the prize of a higher calling in the Light. I can not call my starting out, a messy experience, with out showing that I feel like that. It does not feel good to grow, because growth, requires changing something in our routine that would not change unless I had no other option. Your life is built to lead others who are struggling to come to the other side of change, you Aileen are the "repairer of the breach", to bridge the gap between fear and faith. Your true conversation is touchable to the soul, and what you say, that makes others uncomfortable is the nerve that is hidden until you are naked before others. I love having lunch in Aileen's soul cafe!

  21. I can totally relate to these , we learn through experience and its a learning process.You have totally turned from moth to a colouful butterfly.I always get a good vibes watching your video

  22. In the last 5 years I dared to change my career, go back to school and have my son. Canโ€™t believe I did that

  23. Aileen is like gravity..she attracts everything and everyone…I love everything about her…her eyes, hair, smile…her soul โค๏ธ
    Edit: she's 27 ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜จ
    You look much much younger Aileen ๐Ÿ˜

  24. Many times we think that nothing has changed, but when we look back everything has changed. Many times we critisize ourselves for not doing this and that, that we haven't achieved anything but if we really go back in time, we can see how many things we have done and how proud we should be of ourselves.
    Thanks for that reminder. <3

  25. at first i saw it was 6 min vlog but it felt like 2 mins wow i enjoyed it , also thats why they say THINK PROCESS NOT PRODUCT cuz process is everything and it is so fun

  26. Great video Aileen! I like watching old videos, just shows how much time and energy went into doing them and how far you came – keep up the good work xoxo

  27. Hi Aileen, this video is just right in time for me. I am a new subscriber and I have been binge watching your channel everytime I need to add some dose of inspiration. Thank you for this one, just what I need today.

  28. You are Awesome. . Genuine beautiful soul. . And beautiful outside too. . Omg i cant believe you are 27 ๐Ÿ˜ป

  29. YouTube blessing are you. .. you're so real and I love it! Thank you for sharing. Keep up the good work ๐Ÿ˜Š

  30. Wow I think video came in the right time actually๐Ÿ˜Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ
    When you think about something and it just hit you in your face, wow ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ™†๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’œ๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒฟ

  31. I've always been shy – gradually getting more extroverted but it's a long journey! I can't imagine doing what you do though – well done for putting yourself out there, and for helping others! ๐Ÿ™‚

  32. You should be proud of your progress and your diligent work! Iโ€™ve been trying to improve myself, and I have to remind myself daily that things will get better. โ˜€๏ธ Thank you for your advice and for reminding me once again. Good luck on your audition!

  33. omg!!!! I just realized we have the SAME Chinese character "้„โ€œ in our names. It's not commonly used and sometimes people don't even know how to pronounce it.

  34. Hello, Aileen I really need help I m lost I can't found my self I do not remember who I was or who I m i feel like I don't have no edentity
    I m one of your followers for 2 years now all your videos helped me a lot thanks ! !but I don't know where is the problem I m not the brave talented strong girl any more
    Please some help ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ณ

  35. Does "bright" by ecohsmith still strengthen you Aileen?

    Your voice sounds like the ocean when it comes upon the shore, it gives you peace when you sleep at night.

  36. I'm happy that I found your channel. Your videos are so inspiring.
    This video is really cool and nice. Thanks for telling us your own history. It can help to many people who watch you. Thank you so much๐Ÿ’œ

  37. love you Aileen, this vdo really inspires and motivates me. I was very down today and I don't feel doing anything, but this VDO boosts my energy.

    love you, my inspiration

  38. I wish I can speak as confidently on camera and in front of people as well โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ you are my inspiration!

  39. Love your video and love all the girls leave those positive commons below.
    I always feel so connected with your story and those feelings you shared with us, I'm sure we will get better tomorrow, and no matter if we finally achieve what we want, we can enjoy this journey~~

  40. I have stage fear.I'm 23 but even now I still scared to speak infront of people.. I really wann get over my fear. This is a great lesson…..thank you so much for this video..โคโคโค

  41. โค Just travelled solo! Your channel has given me so much courage and helped me make goals and achieve them. It does get better โค

  42. Portuguese, Italian, and French subtitles are available! Click "CC" and check the video settings. Thank you to the contributors listed in the description ๐Ÿ’•

  43. I'm still afraid of recording/filming myself because I feel awkward about people around me hearing me talk to myself aloud </3

  44. Just what I needed to hear today. I'm starting my YouTube channel, and even though my videos aren't perfect I still upload them. And I keep on reminding myself, "I will get better" even if I cringe at some of the things I say, or how my words jumble up.
    Thank you so much for this message and good luck on your entertainment/media/hosting career.

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