oh hello there my children Welcome back to another episode of revelations
with Rumpet yes yes yes The show where I mister Rumpet help you
the stupid stupid children with all of your problems Yes I mean sorry all of your issues
and the problems with the lovely viewers yes yes yes that’s right it’s not stupid no no no no Yes so today anyway I have a special call
from someone who’s written into the show to say that they need my help and I
thought oh why not turn that into a video Yes so Mr Caller Mr Caller are you on the line? [Caller] Hello! [Rumpet] oh that voice sounds quite
quite familiar [Rumpet] oh hello there.
Welcome to Revelations With Rumpet [Rumpet] with me Mr Rumpet. Oh how
exciting. I bet you’re really really excited aren’t you? [Caller] Oh yes I’m very excited yes [Rumpet] Oh good yes everyone’s very excited
to talk to Mr Rumpet yes yes yes [Rumpet] because I’m so amazing. Oh yes
[Bongani] Yes Yes! [Rumpet] Yes so how can I help you
today my friend? [Caller] Oh well you see I have a very serious
and very sensitive problem [Rumpet] Right… Your voice…
Your voice sounds very familiar [Caller] No! No no no no. I don’t sound like
anyone you’ve ever met no. [Rumpet] No? Ok. I’ll carry on for now yes.
So sorry what was your problem? [Caller] Yes so my problem is…
[Rumpet] Yes? [Caller] I’m not famous enough! [Caller] Yes I know it’s very sad isn’t it? [Rumpet] You’re not famous enough? [Caller] Yes that’s right. I know
it’s very depressing [Rumpet] Wait a minute… I…
Is that you Mr Bongani? [Bongani] Um… Uh… Who? No [Rumpet] Mr Bongani is that you? [Rumpet] You’re the only one who I
know is desperate enough to become famous… [Rumpet] to ring up my show [Bongani] No. I would never make a phone call
to a show like this [Rumpet] You would never make
a phone call to a show like… [Bongani] No no I mean Mr Bongani. [Bongani] Yes Mr Bongani would never make
a phone call to a show like this. That’s right [Rumpet] Right…
[Bongani] I would though yes. I’m desperate [Rumpet] Oh ok. You’re desperate are you but
you’re not Mr Bongani [Rumpet] So who are you then if
you’re not Mr Bongani then? [Bongani] Well I’m not Mr Bongani no.
[Rumpet] No no. [Bongani] My name yes is…
[Rumpet] Right [Bongani] Uh… Uh…
[Rumpet] Yes come on. You must know your name [Bongani] Uh…
[Rumpet] It’s not that hard. Come on [Bongani] My name’s Mr Lamp
[Rumpet] Mr Lamp? [Bongani] Oh I haven’t finished yet. Sorry
[Rumpet] No no of course you haven’t [Bongani] Mr Lamp Uh… Mr Lamp Uh…
[Rumpet] I bet this will be even more convincing. [Bongani] Uh… Uh…
[Rumpet] Yes go on then. What’s your real name? [Bongani] Mr Lamp… Oh! Oh!
Lampsofa! Mr Lampsofa [Rumpet] Mr Lamp… Wait Mr Lampsofa?
[Bongani] Yes that’s a lovely name [Rumpet] Well it’s not really that
lovely is it? It’s a bit weird [Bongani] No it’s lovely [Rumpet] Are you sure you’re not Mr Bongani? [Bongani] No. I can assure you I’m
nothing like Mr Bongani [Rumpet] Mr Bongani is the kind of person
to come up with stupid schemes like this… [Rumpet] where he rings people and then
pretends he isn’t the person because… [Rumpet] he’s too humiliated by the fact
that he’s so desperate [Bongani] No! I can assure you
I’m nothing like him no. I need your help [Rumpet] You’re nothing like Mr Bongani you say? [Bongani] No I’m nothing like him at all
[Rumpet] Nothing at all? [Rumpet] oh okay that would be relief because Mr Bongani is a real pain in the butt [Bongani] I’m sure he’s not but…
[Rumpet] No no no he is [Rumpet] Everyone around here says so
therefore no one really likes him… [Rumpet] but yeah we just put up with him
because we have to [Rumpet] but as you’re not him
then I can tell you that [Rumpet] Because you’re clearly Mr
Lampsofa and not mr. Bongani [Rumpet] So clearly you wouldn’t
care if I say that would you? [Bongani] Oh um… No I wouldn’t
[Rumpet] No no you wouldn’t care no [Rumpet] Maybe you would like to say something degrading about Mr Bongani? [Bongani] I don’t know him.
I’d want to be diplomatic. [Rumpet] Oh no you could just say
something couldn’t you? [Rumpet] You could say something like
“oh he’s just a bit annoying” [Rumpet] Go on. Go on you could say that
because it’s just between you and me [Rumpet] Just between you and me
[Bongani] Um… He is a LITTLE bit annoying [Rumpet] Oh he’s very annoying isn’t he?
[Bongani] Not very annoying! [Rumpet] Oh right ok
[Bongani] No no no no [Rumpet] sure Mr Lampsofa but even
though you’ve never met him before… [Rumpet] you think he’s only a little
bit annoying. I see I see [Bongani] Well I don’t know you see. I haven’t met him
[Rumpet] oh no no no okay well that’s fair enough [Rumpet] Yes okay Mr Lampsofa
[Bongani] Yes [Rumpet] but you wouldn’t happen to…
You say you’re nothing like Bongani [Rumpet] but I just… The other day I happened to be having coffee with my friend Mr Steven Spielberg [Bongani] Oh really!
[Rumpet] yes yes and he said to me [Rumpet] oh well I have this house
available in Hollywood you see [Bongani] Oh!
[Rumpet] And someone could come
and stay there for free [Bongani] oh wow really!
[Rumpet] Yes absolutely free [Rumpet] but of course if you’re nothing
like Mr Bongani you wouldn’t be interested in that [Rumpet] Because it’s only Mr Bongani
whose dream it is to be a Hollywood star [Bongani] Um Um Uh… I also have
a dream to be a Hollywood star as well [Rumpet] Oh you do? oh what a coincidence
[Bongani] Yes. Oh right yes. [Rumpet] How very very convenient and
coincidental that you happen to have that [Rumpet] Oh yes just when I happen to mention
that I have an opportunity [Bongani] Oh yes me and Mr Bongani
just happen to have good taste [Rumpet] But are you also saying that in
no other way are you similar at all is that correct? [Bongani] That’s correct
[Rumpet] Ah good. Right right right [Rumpet] Well cuz the thing is you see…
Mr Spielberg… He was saying that actually… [Rumpet] he needed someone who had orange spots [Bongani] Oh really!
[Rumpet] Yes he was really looking for someone… [Rumpet] who happened to have orange
spots and obviously though you know… [Rumpet] I’m not sure that would be you
though would it no [Bongani] No I have lots of lovely orange spots [Rumpet] oh you do?
[Bongani] Yes that’s right. [Rumpet] Oh how very very interesting
because actually… [Rumpet] that’s another way in which you are
very similar to Mr Bongani you see [Bongani] Oh really. Oh oh
[Rumpet] Yes yes yes [Rumpet] He also has a lot of orange spots
you see. [Bongani] Oh right. Well plenty of animals
have orange spots… [Bongani] So I suppose that it’s not
THAT unusual [Rumpet] Yes though not that
many though do they? no no [Bongani] Um no
[Rumpet] No and er… [Rumpet] and so you don’t happen
to be a giraffe do you? [Bongani] Oh um Yes! I’m the biggest and
the best giraffe in the whole world [Rumpet] Oh oh… Right… Ok but that’s
very interesting because… [Rumpet] Mr Bongani says that he’s the
biggest and greatest giraffe in the entire world [Bongani] Oh… Um…
[Rumpet] Yes how very coincidental so… [Rumpet] You happen to both want to
be a Hollywood star and you both happen… [Rumpet] to be a giraffe
[Bongani] Yes [Rumpet] and you both happen to want to be the biggest and greatest giraffe in the whole world [Bongani] Yes… Er…
[Rumpet] Oh that’s very coincidental isn’t it? [Rumpet] Hmmm…
[Bongani] Um… [Rumpet] oh well of course you’re both two different people though aren’t you yes? [Bongani] Of course yes [Rumpet] and you’re sure
you’re not Mr Bongani right? [Bongani] Of course I’m Mr Lamp Sofa [Rumpet] but it’s Mr Lamp Sofa who is the biggest
and greatest giraffe in the world right? [Bongani] Um… I would probably
say me and Bongani are equal yes [Rumpet] Oh no no no.
I think by the sounds of it [Rumpet] because between you and me
you said you don’t really know mr. bongani you see [Bongani] No I don’t no. [Rumpet] No so between you
and me actually… [Rumpet] Mr Bongani is not is not the greatest and biggest giraffe in the entire world [Rumpet] He’s actually a bit annoying [Rumpet] He’s so irritating and then he’s
always like “me me me” [Bongani] No!
[Rumpet] And he’s always like
I’m so annoying and I’m so needy [Rumpet] And I want to be famous and oh
I want to go to Hollywood. Boo! Boo! Boo! [Bongani] Yes I do want to go to Hollywood
[Rumpet] I’m sorry what was that? [Bongani] I’m sorry. Mr Bongani does want to go
to Hollywood I’m sure yes. [Bongani] But I’m sure if you got to know Mr
Bongani, you’d find he’s lovely too [Rumpet] You already told me that you did not
know him so that’s [Bongani] Oh I’m just trying to be diplomatic [Rumpet] Oh that’s very kind of you. That’s another
way in which you’re much better than Mr Bongani [Rumpet] Oh yes showing much greater
character than Mr Bongani [Bongani] Oh well you suck Rumpet [Rumpet] I’m sorry what? [Bongani] You suck. I’m trying to prove
that I’m not as you think [Rumpet] Oh oh I see. Oh right. For a moment
there I was very taken aback because… [Rumpet] I thought whoa gosh. Mr
Lampsofa seems so nice up until now [Rumpet] And now he’s suddenly being very rude
like Mr Bongani would be [Rumpet] but clearly as you’ve already made it
very clear earlier in this conversation… [Rumpet] You are not Mr Bongani and so I will
certainly spread the word about Mr Lampsofa [Bongani] Oh!
[Rumpet] And I will help Mr Lampsofa… [Rumpet] become the most famous
giraffe in the entire world [Bongani] Oh well that’s very kind of you but… [Rumpet] That’s why you called isn’t it? You called because you’re not mr. bongani and of course… [Rumpet] Mr Bongani doesn’t need my help to become famous. Yes it’s only you Mr Lampsofa [Rumpet] and you made it very clear
you’re not Mr Bongani [Bongani] Oh well you see. You see…
[Rumpet] No it’s fine Mr Lampsofa. [Rumpet] What I’m going to do is I’m
going to speak to my friend Mr Steven Spielberg [Rumpet] And I’m going to say to him
that Mr Lampsofa would be perfect for the job [Bongani] oh! [Rumpet] Yes and that will catapult you
into fame and fortune [Rumpet] and Mr Bongani well he will have to wait.
Yes I was gonna offer it to him… [Rumpet] and to hook him up with the job
[Bongani] Oh right… Oh no [Rumpet] But now it sounds like you are a
much better choice mr. Lampsofa [Bongani] Well maybe you could recommend Mr
Bongani to Mr Spielberg as well [Rumpet] Oh no no
[Bongani] I want to help all my giraffes [Rumpet] Oh no that would be silly though
wouldn’t it? [Rumpet] Why would anyone
recommend two people [Rumpet] when there was one person who
was clearly much better for the job [Bongani] Oh!
[Rumpet] By the sounds of
things… [Rumpet] You are already a thousand times
better than Mr Bongani [Bongani] Oh…
[Rumpet] Oh yes [Rumpet] Even from this
very brief phone call that we have had… [Rumpet] I can tell you are already two times at least
better than Mr Bongani [Bongani] Twice as good? Oh no
[Rumpet] Oh at least twice as good. Maybe more [Rumpet] I mean that would probably
be a low estimate you know [Bongani] Low estimate?
[Rumpet] That’s a safe estimate [Rumpet] oh yes I I mean
probably more like five times better [Bongani] Five times?!
[Rumpet] But I’ll just have to spend some time… [Rumpet] To actually plot it
down on a graph you see. [Bongani] Oh oh
[Rumpet] So I can properly visualize… [Rumpet] How much better you are than him but I
can tell you even on a mental exercise level [Rumpet] I know already you’re miles better [Bongani] But… But.. Oh Um… But I don’t… [Bongani] Oh that’s very kind of you but I’m sure if
you got to know Mr Bongani… [Bongani] You’d find he’s lovely too. [Rumpet] But you told me already
you did not know him [Rumpet] So it’s amazing isn’t it?
I’m gonna fix all of your problems Mr Lampsofa [Bongani] Oh that is amazing [Rumpet] Yes it’s gonna be the greatest
episode of Revelations with Rumpet ever [Rumpet] Where I actually help someone
[Bongani] Oh… Oh [Bongani] Um… Actually…
[Rumpet] It’ll be amazing [Rumpet] Oh yes? Is there something
you want to tell Mr Lampsofa? [Bongani] Um… Yes there is [Rumpet] Oh that would be nice. It’ll be nice
if you were very truthful wouldn’t it? Yes [Rumpet] Do you have something maybe
you want to tell me? [Rumpet] Perhaps maybe you were maybe
making a little bit of a fib weren’t we? [Bongani] Um… Um Yes I was [Rumpet] Yes you’re going to come clean
now aren’t we? [Rumpet] Oh yes this is going to be so good
Oh yes stupid Bongani’s going to finally admit it [Bongani] Yes so my name is
not Mr Lampsofa [Rumpet] Oh oh really… Oh whoa… Oh my
gosh… I’m so surprised… Oh my god… [Rumpet] Alright well what a surprise…
oh no yes [Bongani] yes so my real name…
[Rumpet] Oh yes your real name yes… [Rumpet] Oh does it happen to begin with a B?
[Bongani] Yes it does [Rumpet] Yes okay well you can tell me it’s fine
I will not judge you [Bongani] Yes so my real name… Mr…
[Rumpet] Yes is… Mr… [Rumpet] Bon… Bon…
[Bongani] No. Mr Boxsofa. That’s my real name [Rumpet] What? Mr Boxsofa?
[Bongani] Yes Mr Boxsofa. [Bongani] Yes and I have no idea and don’t
have any relation to Mr Lampsofa or Bongani anyway [Rumpet] What?
[Bongani] Ok bye? [Rumpet] Mr Bongani! Oh! Children!
Oh what happened there Oh Mr Bongani is so stupid oh so annoying.
Oh Mr Lampsofa and Mr Boxsofa. Stupid yes okay well I guess that’s it for another
episode of Revelations with Rumpet Nice to see you children. Hopefully next week we’ll have someone a bit more interesting than Mr Bongani Yes ok Bye!