Laughter is the Best Medicine

Portuguese comedian Ricardo Pinho in Hong Kong

Garren Chu, everyone. You guys [indistinct]? Alright. Please give a really warm up to your next comedian, the dashing
Ricardo Pinho! Hello. I am from Portugal. Everything you are hearing right now is the product of Google Translate. On TV and movies, even the aliens speak English better than I. Did you notice how I just said “better than
I”? Google Translate. I’m finally working on my self confidence
with women by thinking about Adolf Hitler. Because Adolf Hitler had girlfriends. And can you imagine those girls talking to
their mothers about that? Sweetie, your boyfriend he’s literally Hitler. I know he can be a jerk sometimes. What I mean is, he’s a mass murderer. Mom, you need to stop with that. Everytime I bring a guy home you always find something. I think my English is getting better. The other day I got an email from my bank
warning me about “phishing” attempts. Have you ever got one those emails? Be careful with “phishing” attempts? I deleted that email. I know that’s not how you spell fishing. Whenever I meet new people I don’t know how
long I should wait until I finally say “I really like McDonald’s”. I don’t want to pay for expensive ethnic food. I’m ethnic. And from my prespective, McDonald’s is ethnic. American cuisine. You got very serious. I was making jokes about Hitler and you laughed. I make jokes about McDonald’s and suddently I’m a monster? I don’t even like McDonald’s that much. I mean, not as much as monkeys love bananas. Monkeys are very passionate about bananas. Monkeys do anything for bananas. Mister Scientist, you want me to go up those
stairs, get punched in the face,
go down the stairs, and get an electric shock? There’s no way I’m going to do that! I’ll give you a banana. Oh, there’s a banana? I’m on it. Monkeys learn to use computers just to get bananas. Monkeys should have jobs. And then, they would find out that bananas
are cheap. We humans are going to pay for that. I think that’s the very beginning of the Planet
of the Apes. I’m from Portugal, and I’m Portuguese. And I recently found out that there are people
who hate the Portuguese. I didn’t know people knew we existed. Were they done hating all other countries? Our population is so small there aren’t even
enough of us to make a stereotype. And Andrew Chu, that was weird. I was back there, listening to a Chinese guy
in an English night speaking Portuguese? What are the odds? I think he’s trying to seduce me. But I’m not an underwear model. I’m not wearing underwear. You looked at my penis? I said I’m not wearing underwear. I’m wearing pants. I’m still thinking about Hitler. I heard you like Hitler jokes. By the end of the Second World War Hitler got married. Sweetie, are you really going to marry… Hitler? Yes mother, I will never find anyone that’s
as good as him at genocide. Thank you very much. Ricardo… he is very very single. If anyone’s interested.

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