Laughter is the Best Medicine

Seth’s Favorite Jokes of the Week: Robert Mueller’s Congressional Testimony, T-MoBell

-That’s Michael. I’m Seth. These are our favorite
jokes of the week. Several bars
in Washington, D.C., will open early tomorrow
so people can watch Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s
congressional testimony. So by dinnertime, you’ll be
just like the Mueller report — mostly blacked out. The FDA is warning consumers
against purchasing an over-the-counter supplement
called Big Penis USA because it contains undisclosed
traces of prescription drugs. Coincidentally, “Big Penis USA” is also what they call
the Ford F-150 in China. [ Cheers and applause ] Despite saying this afternoon that they are
“very bad for our country,” President Trump today
denied that his attacks on minority congresswomen
are racially motivated. Said Trump, “I am not now
and have never been motivated.” Producers at Warner Bros.
have struck a deal with Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf
to offer special items based on characters
from the sitcom “Friends,” including the Joey,
which is a mango cold-brew tea, the Rachel,
which is a matcha latte, and the Ross,
which is the bathroom key. [ Laughter ] T-Mobile and Taco Bell are running a promotional event
this weekend called T-MoBell, which gives out free tacos inside T-Mobile
cellphone stores. Not to be outdone, Arby’s just
announced their new promotion — Sprint to the Bathroom. [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ]

20 thoughts on “Seth’s Favorite Jokes of the Week: Robert Mueller’s Congressional Testimony, T-MoBell

  1. I didn't get the Ross joke the first time around, and I still don't get it. Is it something to do with "on a break"?

  2. I just realised, at that coffee shop – you go in there and ask for a "cup of Joey" and you get a… tea? Isn't that going to disappoint a lot of people?

  3. Hey sock puppet, your hero Jeffrey Epstein tried to kill himself the other day. Better hurry and pay your respects before it's too late

    Anti-Whites tell us that White people and White countries don't exist.
    Then they flood ALL White countries and ONLY White countries with non-Whites until, within a few decades, there will be no more White countries and, eventually, no more White people. Under international law, that is genocide.
    Don't let the words "diversity" and "multiculturalism" fool you. They are simply codewords for White genocide.
    Anti-racist is a codeword for anti-White.

  5. This dude is a fuckin dumb ass.
    The report is over 90% unredacted
    But he says mostly redacted.. More fake news

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