Laughter is the Best Medicine

Shut Up and Buy This iPhone

(bouncy upbeat music) – [Announcer] Innovation,
inspiration, ingenuity. The new iPhone. The newest in a line of smartphones that have revolutionized
the way we communicate and make the world a better place. Revolutionize the way we communicate? Aren’t these things
almost a thousand dollars despite the cheap way we use to make them? 100 percent. But what are you gonna do about it? Not buy an iPhone? (laughing) Don’t make me laugh. You’re nutsack, so buy the iPhone. You need a phone right? You can’t call into work
with a carrier pigeon. What are you gonna do? Take your fixy down to the phone smith and grab a handmade Samsung you dumb piece of. You think an Android was made under better working conditions you stupid Pollyanna? We’ve got you cornered pissbag. It’s our world now. Drive an electric car? That electricity still
comes from fossil fuels. Eat vegan? You’re groceries are picked
by exploited migrants. You couldn’t be good if you tried. So wallow in your sin, and play some JuiceJam on
your phone while you’re at it. The way I see it, you’ve got two options. One, you could organize with
other working class people, go on strike, form unions and collectives. Unite together with your
friends, family, and neighbors to dismantle the systems of
oppression and inequality in our society. I know it sounds hard, but
it’s actually not that hard. You could start right now. You’re on the computer, you’re a click away from being better. Or, you could be a nasty
little pig and buy the phone. The new iPhone. Squeal for me pig. Squeal. (techno music) – Hey gang, Brennan here. If you dig college humor
and wanna support what we do sign up for Dropout. For the cost of a very
big dumpling per month, you’ll get videos like
this a whole week sooner, chat with us live in the Dropout discord, and exclusive content
such as Dimension 20. There are no stupid questions. – Are you my freaking dad? (group laughing) – So sign up for your free trial today. Or don’t, ya know, do
what you think is right. I’m not, I’m not trying to
tell you how to live your life. I don’t even know you,
that would be crazy. I um, it was wrong of me
to tell you what to do. I’m sorry, and that’s on me. I’m ruining the CTA?

100 thoughts on “Shut Up and Buy This iPhone

  1. There is literally soooo many videos exposing and making fun of apple that the dick riders buying there overpriced garage look like 🤡🤡

  2. The funniest part of this sketch is assuming the idea came from Siobhan just going on a half hour rant on why apple sucks. Which is a video I’m down to see.

  3. "Take your fixie down to the phome smith and by a samsung you dumb piece of shit" I might be one of a few to get a joke about a type of bike but i appreciate it sm

  4. I know this is the only thing people comment nowadays and that it isn’t really in the creator’s hands but the censoring really takes me out of the video 🙁 even audible bleeps would be better

  5. I'll pass, thanks. My s9+ still works fantastic, and can do everything (and more) better than an iphone. Plus most of the apps are free..and in general the android operating system is just light years ahead of shitty old ios.

  6. It you put bleeping noises and put a cuss count it would've been hilarious. Also today is the day the NEW iPhone came out so why advertise that one (unless it's some sort of joke *sees named college humor*)

  7. the android is absolutely not made under better conditions but at least it doesnt cost both my kidneys even though it cost pennies for them to make and have most of the space taken up by unremovable bloatware and if it gets broken i cant just take it to a normal phone repairer i have to go to one who you certified and honestly apple yes i would rather send a carrier pigeon then use your shitty phone that you update to break down every time you release a new model viva la revolution because im too poor to afford shit anyway so it makes no difference to me

  8. It’s almost like the entire comedic infrastructure of this video is built on the premise that an apple ad would never sound like this and by censoring it you’re seriously undercutting the joke to the point where it’s not even worth it.

    Or something.

  9. You guys could put in something else instead of beeps. Metalocalypse used pinch harmonics for beeps and it was great. You guys should have like a certain sound for each cast member based on their character.

  10. I thought I was supposed to laugh at the excellent writing and social commentary. It took me way too long to realize that this was an Andy-Kaufman-esque prank on the audience, and that the real humor comes from the audience’s rage at the audio dropping out every two seconds.

    “No it’s just censoring,” they’ll say. Sure. Sure it is. Well played, CH. Very droll.

  11. I still don't understand why people in my demographic A) buy apple products and B) buy new phones.
    My last 3 phones I bought used and was quite happy with. .. . if I added the cost for all three of them together they would still be cheaper than any current gen iphone

  12. At least we're moving from undergrad "all white people are evil" towards where social problems actually stem from in 2019.

  13. I miss the iPhone commercials.
    I SAID THE REALL IPHONE COMMERCIALS that you guys used to made with the guy and creepy johny or something

  14. Suikoden II automatically came to mind. One of the best vilains of all times kill a girl after saying he would spare her if she squeal like a pig. The line was so alike… and suikoden is such a great RPG series.

  15. Your not going to call into work with a f***ing Carry-on pigeon!

    I paid $1000 just to call my parents, my one friend and my boss/coworkers! Plus almost $500 a year!

  16. why are any of you acting like you're against apple in any way whatsoever when every single one of you definitely own macbooks and most likely own iphones too :/

  17. Hey college humor! I mean you Sam! These ads are despicable just make it all only on dropout if you're really going to do this. I can't even skip it until 40 seconds in and it doesn't declare itself an ad until then.

  18. You could buy a Fairphone IF THEY MADE THEM FOR AMERICAN CELL WAVES not that I have strong feelings on the only fairtrade smart phone being almost useless to me, nope, no siree

  19. Why pay over a thousand dollars on a phone when I can buy a older model of any phone for half the price because it’s no longer the newest version.

  20. We had 45 years of socialism and we were begging for capitalism and democracy from the West. Now that same west is promoting socialism as something good. This is pathetic.

  21. i know they are making fun of Apple and this is supposed to be funny or whatever but doesnt the entire cast(maybe office) use macs? feels kinda like odd that they would make a video about making fun of apple while still using apple

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