Merry Lion Comedy Club, Singapore Surya is gonna leave us tomorrow and this is going to be his last impression in Singapore. Let’s hope it’s a good one. No pressure Surya! Welcome One, you don’t want to have too much of plastic waste Second, it’s expensive and third you might have had Thai green curry yesterday and it [the water bottle] works as a fire hydrant I’m usually not comfortable with something this big hanging in front of my mouth My grandmother, she recently joined tinder and she’s very determined I’m telling you. She takes it to the temple and before every swipe she strikes the bell. That’s how determined she is! I love my grandfather a lot. I’ve never seen him but he died 15 times for me so that I could get a holiday every year They never check if your grandfather is actually dead And sometimes I used to kill him two or three times a year because the teacher didn’t remember I remember having Chemistry in class 9. That was the worst thing I ever had I failed by half a mark because my teacher decided to dissect the middle page with a red pen and I decided that the next term I’d definitely pass so I just rememberd the definition “ When gases react, they do so in volumes which bears a simple whole no. ratio to one another and to the volumes of the products, if gaseous, provided the temperature and pressure of the reacting gases and their products remain constant. [Gay Lussac’s Law] I realized one thing right that if you say something out loud 1,800 times you’ll remember it. Next term I passed with 36. Anyway, how many of you have been to a hostel Hostel life is great. So one morning I did not wake up alone and it was weird because I did not have a girl friend and I wasn’t drunk the previous night but I saw the sexiest pair of legs in my room. I was just, in my bed, squinting like this, and I saw that it was Vivek. A friend of mine. A guy. Actually he didn’t have a single strand of hair on his legs As a matter of fact You have seen that Nicole Kidman ad where she waxes her legs? Actually they have just used her face in that ad, For the rest they got Vivek because they could not afford her You guys like Singapore a lot? Today, I went to this zoo, Singapore zoo So I decided to change my career. I wanted to become an Orangutan. [Orangutans are great apes, as opposed to monkeys, and are closely related to humans, having 97% of DNA in common] One, he is my ancestor, that’s believable People pay to see him. For him a Monday is as good as a Sunday. He gets fed on time. He can throw tantrums without worrying. He’ll never get tagged in a ‘MeToo’ post no matter where he pinches And then I went for this river safari. There I saw this Panda And I wanted to become the Panda, instead of the Orangutan because he was also getting the air conditioner that the Orangutan wasn’t getting. Thanks for watching! Please don’t forget to Like, Share, Comment or Subscribe.