WAAH Ahh! Stop, I could’ve dropped my croissant! *Record Scratch*
*Classical, Sophisticated Music Plays* 🎵I’m gonna make the whole world deaf🎵 🎵From all of your screams🎵 🎵Duda Da Duda Da Duuu🎵 It’s over between us bro But Bro!
-I’m not your bro, dawg But Dawg, come on!
I’m not your dawg, homie What’s the weirdo doing…? Magic, DUH? A wise man once said: “Aim small, be small- -And don’t belive in yourself, Nathan. You’ll never amount to anything.
Get out of my classroom” And then, uhh, he unwrapped his fingers
around my throat and err, let me leave 4th grade was wild! *Dramatic music* *Dramatic music intesifies* Are you a pedophile!? Pedophile!? That’s a pretty big word for a 6-year old! Dustin, what did you get? Alrighty *facepalm* -s Act like a bitch, get slapped like a bitch You think you can steal from me boy!? Did you just f*cking assume me GENDER!? No you’re right, I’m a dude *people speaking over each other* Oh my god… You FUCKING kids! I’VE GOT PLACES TO BE! ♫And you may ask yourself…♫ ♫Well…
How did I get here?♫ What was your test on again? Human anatomy? *Death stare* I failed biology because I don’t have DNA I have DN-Slay Can you read? OOH!? Can I read?
-Yeah, can you? Can you host? *Crowd realization* They ask you how you are,
and you just have to say that you’re fine When you’re not really fine, but you just
can’t get into it because- they would never under… 😘 Hah! HA! Ha! For gods sake I kiss my mom harder than that! *appropriate Disney song* No no no-! Get back motherfucker,
you don’t know me like that! ♪Now, this is a story all about how♪ ♪my life got flipped, turned upside down♪ ♪And I’d like to take a minute,
just sit right there!♪ I’ll tell you how I became the
prince of a town called (hawkins?) *Clears throat* *Piano* Finally! I can’t even believe I thought we would
be good together now that I think about it! We got too much in common first of all! How can I deal with a girl that likes the
same movies, music and food as me? Okay? You copy me-
Where is your artisitc integrity!? ♪You better back the fuck up
before you get smacked the fuck up♪ What the hell are you talking about? *Punchy-noise* *roar* Someone certainly enjoys making an entrance I have a very strong vision
for this character *the sound of someone’s mind crushing a can* My mind crushed a can I think that I added a
dimension to the character Pretty… I made it haha jokes Carol, for once in your life,
shut your damn mouth! HELL F*CKIN YEEEAAAAAH *Suspicious sound* Who are you, and how did you get in here? I am a locksmith and… I am a locksmith Even the babies are one of the most
dangerous animals in the world So I build this cage to keep him secure so there’s no possible- OH MY GOD For all we know, she’s the monster …monster, you DUMBASS! *Punch that dumbass* What’s going on?
-It’s Will. He’s trying to talk to me HHhhhhHhahahaha Through the lights Ahahahaha You serious? Hey Girl, you dropped something What? Your standards, hi I’m Steve So basically, what I was thinking of is erm… AHH FUCK. I can’t believe you’ve done this You’re dead Wheeler. DEAD! i pooped my pants Okay so, for this next scene- Where’s Barb? Haha, yeah I could litterally kill you! If I wanted to kill you, I’m being sarchastic Oh!
-Yeah I’ll just chop off your arms and rip- Hi, I’m a sex offender! Damn, you look like hell Chief Oh yeah? I look better than your wife when
I left her this morning I don’t have a wife, I live with my mom Even better Kissing Sucks! *Sad violin music*
If you know how I feel, why would you say that? Like, you put me in such an
uncomfortable situatuon like you- Don’t do it man
-I swear to god I’m gonna do it dude! I don’t know how I’ll live if you do it!
-I’m doing it! DAB! AHH I dont believe we’ve met, what’s your name Ele-
-Eleanor! I’m 11, so STFU Kylie Jenner to the foyer I have a little surprise for you Is that a chicken? Netflix series Stranger Things is set in
Indiana during the early 1980’s and features a
character named Steve Harrington The show Parks and Recreation takes place in
Indiana during present day And features a character named
Jean Ralphio Saperstein Is this just a coincidence? Yes But wait! There’s more! Hey-hi! Nice to meet ya, I’m Ben
-Oh hi! Hey-hi! Nice to meet ya, I’m Joe Is, Steve Harrington
Jean Ralphios real father? I’ll never tell Wait a minute (Yes that’s sweatshirt in slow motion) *In perfect harmony*:
♪MP3 copied on a vinyl♪ What are we doing? OH MY GOD that’s what I was just doing! THAT’S IT!
Everything makes sense, yo tell me I’m wrong! You’re wrong
-Okay Jacob keep your shirt on!!
-NO! GIVE. ME. GOD.DAMN. WAAFLEES! I’m your host, John Coco Marshall needs this pin to seal his victory
otherwise John has the opportunity to catch up OOOH, He misses!
He missed like I miss my dad every day YA KNOW I’M JUST TRYNA sIT HeRE AND EaT MA
WAFFleS AND YOu JUsT F*CKinG DISREspecTED MEEE! …she sometimes doesn’t
like hanging out with you *Facial recognition got a hit* Jesus Christ, that’s Jason Bourne ♪When I’m through with you♪ ♪They’ll never find your body♪ ♪And even if they did…♪ All they’d find would be teeth You have a lotta nerve showing up here What? You could have at least called said
“Marissa, hey, it’s not gonna work out” “Sorry I waisted your time. I’m a dick!” Yep ♪McDonalds is so tasty and delicious♪ ♪Badabbambambaaa, I think I just got Diabetes♪ What’s on your face It’s a mustache Meg Ohoho, I think it’s sexy!
-I think it’s gay It’s not gay Brian, If I’m gay, then
Freddie Mercury was gay! Freddie Mercury the lead singer of Queen!?
He was incredibly gay! He was not, he had a mustache!
Which is practically like a wedding ring! This is crazy Calm down, she’s just closing her eyes Banana? Holy… …yes, we went out to find Will,
not another problem! Curtis, what do you think? Oooh, know you know I ain’t allowed to think! *piano-playing* Motherf*cker Pff, screw gravity! Smash, Smash, S-mash! Yeah ♪Set out on a mission, to find our inner peace♪ ♪Make it-♪ That was legitness Remember kids,
if a strange man offers you sweets There’s probably more in his car *Ding* Happy Birthay B*tch So you just gon’ bring me a birthday gift
on my birthday to my birthdayparty on my- -birthday with a birthday gift Happy birthday? Is that blood? Next time you fucking put your hand
on me Imma fucking rip your face off, bitch Hey man, here’s your parachute OOh, so you think I’m too scared to jump
out of this plane without a parachute now? No I- you should probably just wear one? Why cause I’m scared? Of falling?
And dying? Whoooah! Precisely, yes That’s it! AAAAAAAaaaaaahahhhh Nevermind, can I get that parachute please ♪My first kiss went a little like this♪ WOW!
-Dude, that’s creepy *guitar*
BITCH! Thank you So son, you wanna play any sports?
-No I wanna dance dad! You wanna what? I said I wanna DA- Hello, and welcome to standing up school! *Flop* Aaand, you failed Steve? I’m gay! Guys, you know what we should do?
We should summon a demon! Okay, stop! You black, we don’t do that You right, I’m black, nevermind *Tyler Joseph’s most impressive lyrical work* ♪AAAaH, It’s okay, when it’s in a threeway♪ ♪It’s not gay, when it’s in a threeway♪ ♪They see me rolling, they hatin’
controlling and tryin’ catch my ridin’ dirty♪ ♪Tryna catch me ridin dirty, tryna catch-♪ Iggy Azalea… Is the best rapper of ALL TIME! (I don’t even know what this sound is) This is what I get for adopting you!?? Btw, you’re adopted You’re just pissed off cause you wanna
hang out with Steve! *Death stare 2.0* Steve?
-Who is Steve? Her new boyfriend THIs Is WHy MoM DOESN’T F*cKInG LOVE YOU How do I get to you? H-How do I find you,
what should I do? *demogorgon breaking through wall-sound* ROAR What you got is you got a bird And you got a bee And, what happens is they find each other On the internet They talk to each other for a little bit And then, if you’re lucky they’ll see each
other in person And then, and that’s, and then you have a family Thank you Uhh, buzz? We missed the truck We’re not aiming for the truck I don’t wanna hang out with you
anymore when this is over When this is what, over? I said, I don’t wanna hang out with you
anymore when this is over! When this is what?
You gotta finish your sentence! Over That’s it, my sentence is over! Your sentence is what, over. My sentence is… Wait a minute, I have to
say over even if the sentence ends -with the word ‘over’? End with the word what, Bryan? Over OVER! Why are you wearing pajamas? Tche! PPh! These aren’t pajamas! This is a warmup suit! You’re still drinking! I don’t drink anymore so
don’t start with that again! So why was this under your bed? WE NEED WATER TO LIVE! NOT IN MY DAMN HOUSE!! ♫We’re breaking free♫ ♫We’re soaring, flying♫ I love you so much, would you marry me?
-Shut up Lucas What are you fucking gay? ♫I wanna be drunk when I wake up♫ Where’s the f*cking queen!?
We need to save the queen! We are at the white house!
-AAarghH Nooo! We need an adult in the white house *a world on fire by Bo Burnham* Why are you running? WHY are you running!? And she just threw it all away! I just, I don’t know if there’s anything I
could’ve done to have prevented it I’m sure it’s gonna be fine!
-It’s NOT GONNA BE FINE EVER NEVER GONNA BE FINE WHAT THEY HAD WAS SO SPECIAL YOU
DON’T EVEN KNOW. You would never know. What do you mean I’d never know!?
I’ve been in love! Ouchh, not like them! Not like them… When you capture the right moment… It says more *Inspirational music*
*Eagle roaring* Wow man… That was…That was That was pretty lame
-Wow, alright Yeah, that was pretty cringey You spend far too much time
with your computer, It’s not healthy It’s my life That’s very very sad! ♫You’re what would happen if
Winnie the Pooh f*ucked Slenderman!♫