Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Substitute Teacher – Key & Peele


[bell rings] – ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP, Y’ALL. I’M Y’ALL’S SUBSTITUTE TEACHER,
MR. GARVEY. I TAUGHT SCHOOL FOR 20 YEARS
IN THE INNER CITY, SO DON’T EVEN THINK
ABOUT MESSING WITH ME. Y’ALL FEEL ME?
– MM-HMM. – OKAY.
LET’S TAKE ROLL HERE. JAY QUELLIN. WHERE’S JAY QUELLIN AT? NO JAY QUELLIN HERE? – [clears throat]
– YEAH. – UH, DO YOU MEAN JACQUELINE? – OKAY. SO THAT’S
HOW IT’S GONNA BE. Y’ALL WANNA PLAY. OKAY, THEN. I GOT MY EYE ON YOU,
JAY QUELLIN. BALAKAY. WHERE IS BALAKAY AT? THERE’S NO BALAKAY HERE TODAY? YES, SIR. – MY NAME IS BLAKE.
– BL… ARE YOU OUT
OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND? [mocking voice] BLAKE.
WHAT? DO YOU WANNA GO TO WAR, BALAKEY?
– NO. – ‘CAUSE WE COULD GO TO WAR.
– NO. – I’M FOR REAL.
I’M FOR REAL. SO YOU BETTER CHECK YOURSELF. DEE-NICE. IS THERE A DEE-NICE? IF ONE OF Y’ALL SAYS
SOME SILLY-ASS NAME… THIS WHOLE CLASS
IS GONNA FEEL MY WRATH. NOW, DEE-NICE.
– DO YOU MEAN DENISE? – SON OF A BITCH! YOU SAY YOUR NAME RIGHT,
RIGHT NOW. – DENISE?
– YOU SAY IT RIGHT. – DENISE.
– CORRECTLY. – DENISE.
– RIGHT. – DENISE.
– RIGHT. – DEE-NICE.
– THAT’S BETTER. – [sighs]
– THANK YOU. NOW, AY-AY-RON. WHERE ARE YOU? WHERE IS AY-AY-RON RIGHT NOW? NO AY-AY RON, HUH? WELL, YOU BETTER BE SICK,
DEAD, OR MUTE, AY-AY-RON! – HERE.
OH, MAN. – WHY DIDN’T YOU ANSWER ME
THE FIRST TIME I SAID IT, HUH? – HUH?
– YOU KNOW, I’M JUST ASKING YOU. I SAID IT,
LIKE, FOUR TIMES. SO WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY IT THE
FIRST TIME I SAID, “AY-AY-RON?” – BECAUSE IT’S PRONOUNCED
“AARON.” – SON OF A BITCH!
[clattering] YOU DONE MESSED UP, AY-AY RON,
NOW TAKE YOUR ASS ON DOWN TO OH-SHAG-HENNESY’S OFFICE
RIGHT NOW AND TELL HIM EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID! – WHO?
– OH-SHAG-HENNESY! – PRINCIPAL O’SHAUGHNESSY? – GET OUT OF MY GODDAMN
CLASSROOM BEFORE I BREAK MY FOOT OFF
IN YOUR ASS! INSUBORDINATE… AND CHURLISH. TYM-OH-THEE. – PRESENT.
– THANK YOU!

100 thoughts on “Substitute Teacher – Key & Peele

  1. Subscribe to the new Key & Peele YouTube channel for all the classics as well as new-to-YouTube sketches: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdN4aXTrHAtfgbVG9HjBmxQ?sub_confirmation=1

  2. I really never liked their show but this one is frickin hilarious. Can watch it 100 times and it's still funny as…

  3. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐ŸคฃI almost peed my pants….I got my eye on you jeyqualien

  4. โ€œIf one of yโ€™all says some silly ass name, this whole class is gonna feel my wrath.โ€๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  5. Bruh I feel this too deep because so many substitute teachers are literally THIS hard headed about the dumbest things…

  6. One must wonder how many Aarons ("Air-uns") are getting hassled by this video…
    The jesting and joking about this is going to go on for decades…..Welcome to your new world order…
    Ay-Ay-Ron.

  7. My full name is Jacqueline. I had people reference this video and I had no idea what they were talking about. Saw the video. Now we say my name correctly together. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  8. "Timothey."
    "Pre-sent"
    "ThAnK yOu!!!!!!"
    I love that the only black guy in the room said the word "correctly".

  9. Hahahaha.
    I'm asian, so no teacher ever got my name right.
    Its jino, like I would make pizza, not check out your moms vagina every few months.

  10. I get this all the time ๐Ÿ˜ฉteachers think itโ€™s a boy and Iโ€™m sitting there with my hand raised and they mark me absent and I have to shout that Iโ€™m there and they act all confused

  11. I wonder how many times they had to redo this because the cast kept laughing ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ it would have took me about 5 times ๐Ÿ’€

  12. Lol ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†

  13. The secret to a good life is to express gratitude whenever you feel it. Every day, upon waking, I give thanks that Key and Peele found each other and made this amazing art for us.

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