Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

TINDER WAALI GIRLFRIEND AUR PAPA – Standup Comedy by Mohit Arora – LIMEWIT Live


Abhi abhi apan Engineering karne gaye Engineering college me Apan ko mila GAANJA Humne phoonka Semester nikal gaya Are bhai itna phoonka Itna phoonka itna phoonka Parvati maiya call kar rahi kal hume Keh rahi “Kya kar rahe ho aaj kal” Humne kaha “Gaanja phoonk rahe hain” Keh rahi “Achha phoonkte raho phir” Maine kaha “Aunty ke ho gaya” Keh rahi “Shiv ji hosh me rehne lag gaye… …Tum unka stock khatm kar gaye yaar” Toh bhai, phir maine kaha “Aunty aisa nahi hai, paise waise khatm ho rahe… …Gaanja nahi mil raha ab” Keh rahi “Koi baat nahi… … mai sher ke muh me… …noto ki gaddi daba kar bhej rahi hu… Tu Gaanja phoonkta reh” Abhi abhi yaar meri phir setting ho gayi ladki se Tinder pe Waise toh milti nahi Engineering college me gaye na Apne bade bade sapne Ladko se baat nahi karni bhai LADKIYAAN Sirf LADKIYAAN Class me gaye 45 ladke 5 ladki Kisi ka muh tedha, koi guthka kha rahi Koi smoke kar rahi Maine kaha “Yeh to next level pe hai bhai… Mai nahi karu Ek mili third year ki Usee baatchit hui thodi bahut Ek din mujhe keh rahi Tum batao “Mujh me koi kami hai kya?” Mai kaha “Dekh, Aaspaas dekh” Keh rahi ” Haan dekh rahi” Maine kaha “Kitne Ladke dikh rahe hain” Keh rahi “PACHAAS” Maine kaha “Ladki kitni dikh rahi” “PAANCH” Maine kaha “Phir bhi mai tere saath akela khada hu” “Aur mujhe bhi koi ummeed nahi hai… …Mujhe bhi tu friend pasand hai” Toh ladki se setting hui aur phir Mereko pehli problem jo dikhi na Mummy aur girlfriend ki na jamti nahi hai Matlab unki dhamkiya bhi alag alag Punishment alag alag Mummy keh rahi us din “Ghar aayega na khana nahi milega tereko” Maine kaha thik hai bhai Mai girlfriend pe gaya “Kehti ghar aaoge khaane ko nahi milega” Jinhe pata hai, Unhe pata hai Uske shauk alag alag Keh rahi “Tumhari shave karungi” Maine kaha “Dekh mai sirf face pe karta hu” Toh wo kehti “Thik hai, face pe” Maine kaha “Dekh aaram se kar … ..kat jayega nahi to naayi apan dekh lenge” Keh rahi “Nahi Nahi Nahi, mai karungi aaj” Keh rahi “Maine Aashiqui 2 me dekha tha” Maine kaha “Chal thik hai, tu kar le” Kya hi bol sakte hai yaar Chahiye hota hai apne ko To lagi yaha se shuru kara Shuru kara kat diya Apan to bhai mummy ke bete Apan pehle rone lage Khoon nikal raha hai apna Idhar ko bhaag ke gayi Mereko laga Doctor Doctor ko bulayegi Keh rahi “Idhar aao, idhar aao ” Maine kaha “Haan” Kehti hai lo “UMMAAAH” Ab thik ho jayega Maine kaha “Waha doctor G***D mara rahe hai Medicine bana bana ke” Meri chot tera UMMM thik karega Par phir bhai apan ne sacrifice kia Kya kare “Katwa lia” Papa, Papa ke sath aaya koi, Papa ke sath, Papa ke sath aya koi Chalo badhiya Papa yaar Mereko papa nahi pasand apne Dekho tum Maa ki aankho me na Maa ki aankho me tumhe dikhti h MAMTA Papa tumhe ANALYSE kar rahe hote hain Yeh paida kiya hai maine ? Mera hai kya ? Pakka mera hai ? Papa analyse kar rahe hote hain Full on! Matlab Ladkiyo ke liye yaar Dekho tumhe dus problem hai Lekin, you know ladko ki ek dikkat hai Hume kutai padti hai Maar padti hai, maante ho Kisi ladki ko padi kutai yaha pe aaj tak padi ho to phir tumhare kaand hain Tumhi ne kuch bohot hi achha kiya hai Tum next level khel rahe ho bhai Toh us din mereko mere Papa Maarte rahe aise pakad pakad ke Tumhe pata hi hai, kaise padta hai Dandi to hoti hai , ghusa de? Aur mere ko bataya bhi nahi Aise hi maarna shuru kar diya Ek Uncle aaye waha se Keh rahe “Kya ho gaya… …in ladke ne kyu maar rahe ho?” Keh rahe “Kal Result hai iska… …Aur aaj main bahar ja raha hu” Maine kaha “Thik hai” Hamara bhi aayega Toh apan jaa rahe the ek baar scooty pe Papa aur mai Scooty pe nahi, hum paidal ja rahe the Ek ladki gujari Ladki matlab Ek hoti hai “Ladki” Ek hoti hai “Hoor” Aur uske upar jo aati hai na “Pari” Bhaisaab aise nikali “Ekdum KANCHA” Toh bhai, tumhare bhai ko toh aadat hai Laundo ke saath ghumne ki “Oh dekh dekh dekh ja rahi hai” *Typical Delhi Despos* Oye Bhaisaab, tune dekha nahi Aage se dekha tune, aage se dekha Piche se dekhta na tu BAAWLA ho jaata “Bhabhi hai teri” Maine kaha “Pata hai tereko naam uska” “Nahi number note kar liya maine” Toh bhai apne ko kya Hum laundo ke saath ghume Humne aise yaar Muda dekha jab tak nikal nahi gayi Mere vision se Bhool gaye the Papa sath me hain Ab aise mude Kaand ho jayega Toh waha pe likha hua hai Do mojo ke sath Ek moja free Papa ko pasand aayega offer Main aise muda Papa bhi udhar dekh rahe Maine bola “Papa, kya, kya?” Keh rahe hain “Wo do mojo ke sath… Humne kaha “Jaa apne baap ko mat sikha” *That was the last day of his life*

100 thoughts on “TINDER WAALI GIRLFRIEND AUR PAPA – Standup Comedy by Mohit Arora – LIMEWIT Live

  1. Catch Mohit Arora LIVE along with other Viral Standup Comedians & Poets at a LIMEWIT Live Event Near You.

    REGISTER at : www.limewit.com/live

  2. डिट्टो कॉपी। कुछ और कर ले बच्चे। गलती से तुम्हारे वीडियो पे आ गया। दुबारा नही देखूंगा।

  3. Shi hai yrr aaj kal b grade comedy kro women objectificaion kro… Vulgar bno or comedy ka nam pr famous ho lo… Or jb ek aunty keh de ke ldkio ko chote kpde nhi pehnne cha he Yeh toh us pr bdk jao pr yha Yeh saf keh rha hai ke ldki ke sth sex krne ke leyai sb kuch shen kr lo toh ki dkkkat nhi hai wah mera youth tuje salam

  4. Self respect wala comedian public nahi hans rahi to khud hi hans raha hai bhosadi ka…..🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  5. Pta ni logo ko kya ho gya h… Arey yr comedy h comedy ke tara enjoy kro… Why peoples are offend with his jokes? Btw nice work bro

  6. Bhai u are doing awesome but u are copieing zakir bhai and this is not ri8 for you make ur own style #awesome

  7. Abhey lodey k thudey saale gaandve.. Behnchodh gaandu
    Chutiyo jaisi shkl hai teri uppr se kr kea rha hai tu gandve.. Chutiyaa sala..

  8. Abey chutiye crowd mad dikhaya karo tu to chutia hai hai he unka bhi chutia mat kaat bhai… I swear itni C bhi hasi ni aa rahi…. Tu lajpat nagar ka to nahi papa ki mobile ki dukaar tu bakchodi kar raha hai

  9. Mohit bhai, gaand maraane ka bussiness kaisa chal raha hai.

    Maa chuudane ka business start kiya?
    Apne papa ko bol darwaaze pe cashier ka kaam karenge.

    Teri video dekhne nahi aaya. Just dhande ki baat ki.

  10. Y they use so cheap language….and girls are not the kancha and thing only that u can set or rate them….ur content is too much…😡

  11. So Cheap…Chutiye Teri Behen Ke Saath Koi Aisa Kare…Jaisa Tu Apne Chutiye Se Video Main Bol Raha Hai Kaisa Lagega….BC bus yehi hai comedy tum jaise chutiyo k liye…growup and be a real comedian not a cheapester…

  12. Fuckers he is atleast trying to be someone rather than commenting judgemental comments y’all burning ass people ..very well done brother keep going💛

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