Anecdota

Laughter is the Best Medicine

Tom Willard at National Comedy Center – Aug. 4, 2018


Hi everyone, I’m Tom. I’m not doing
Paula Poundstone, I’m doing my own thing. I’m a deaf guy. That’s why I’m signing. So I can understand
what I say. [Laughter] I was 8 when I started
to lose my hearing and the doctor
was very blunt. He said, “Tom will go
completely deaf some day.” “Teaching him to read lips … will be like money in the bank.” He was right. I never did learn to read lips … and I don’t have
any money in the bank. [Laughter] But lipreading is crazy. Everybody thinks deaf people
all read lips. We don’t. I don’t even know if
you’re talking to me … or chewing gum. [Laughter] (Chewing) “What? What did you say?” “Nothing.
I’m chewing gum.” “Oh. Sorry.” And then later …. “Tom! We have to
get out of here!” “The place is on fire!” I’m looking and
I’m thinking, “Wow, is that still the
same piece of gum?” [Laughter] Deaf people have
a hard time finding work. I’m self-employed … and I can’t even get
that guy to hire me. [Laughter] But then I read that
it’s not good for you … if you sit down
all the time … so I started doing
standup. I don’t expect to become
the next Jerry Seinfeld … but plenty of comedians
you’ve never heard of … make a good living
from comedy, and so that’s my goal: To become one of
those comedians … you’ve never heard of. [Laughter] Let me ask you, have you ever
heard of me? No? So far, so good. [Laughter] I want to tell
a dirty one. [It’s not allowed] I tried to register
to vote … with the Libertarian
Party … but I spelled it wrong … and now I’m a librarian. [Laughter] And I tried to sign up
with Triple A … but I left out a letter … and now I’m stuck
going to all these meetings. [Laughter] And one time I had
a sign-language interpreter … who kept cutting me off. and I didn’t know why … but then I found out why. They didn’t hire an interpreter, they hired an interrupter. [Laughter] I didn’t even know
they had those. Okay, my time is over, but thank you, I’m To …

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